Tag: #TrustinGod
Mr. Bojangles – Our furry treasure with a tripod leg and a golden heart

Mr. Bojangles – Our furry treasure with a tripod leg and a golden heart

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“But ask the animals, and they will teach you, or the birds in the sky, and they will tell you; or speak to the earth, and it will teach you, or let the fish in the sea inform you. Which of all these does not know that the hand of the Lord has done this? In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind.” (Job 12:7-10)

One of David’s and my favorite stories of our initial deep connection begins with a text message I sent to David. I had agreed for him to stop by my house before he returned to VA Beach – just a few days after we met. “I hope you’re not allergic to cats,” I began, “as I have three. I promise I’m not a crazy cat lady. They all found me, and I couldn’t say ‘no.'”

David’s first text to me with Bo on his lap as he returned from Ft. Myers, FL.

That’s when David sent me the now infamous photo of our precious Bo-man sitting on his lap while he drove his car to my home in GA. Really, God? I remember thinking. He’s a cat-man, too?

I soon learned that David is much more than a cat-man. He has the tender heart of an animal parent.

And Bo was much more than a cat. He had a tripod leg and a golden heart that outshone his beautiful coat. When Bo looked you in the eyes, you swore he was seeing into your soul. While we reluctantly surrendered our fur-baby back to God in November 2024, he will live forever live in our hearts.

Bo’s full moniker was Mr. Bojangles – a name given due to Bo’s initial penchant for wandering. David adopted Bo and two other cats after one of his friends passed away, leaving the sweet kitties as orphans. Bo’s name at the time was “Orange,” which David felt lacked the character this noble beast deserved. Along with Bo came Monroe and an older female cat who didn’t live long after her former owner died. Monroe was the alpha and dominated Bo. Monroe lived with David for close to seven years until he eventually died in his sleep.

Bo was initially reluctant to trust David – preferring to stay under David’s house most of the time. He only ventured out for meals and nighttime discovery missions.

David kept his window open at night, hoping Bo might eventually venture inside. One night, he did just that.

As any cat person knows, kitties perceptively know how to wake us by gently brushing their whiskers over our faces. That’s precisely what Bo did one evening – surprising David with a gentle whisker kiss in the middle of the night. It’s as if he said, “I trust you now, and I’ll let you keep me.” There was no going back from that moment of surrender.

David continued to let Mr. Bojangles out during the day, thinking that’s what his kitty wanted. In the process of moving to his new place, David’s roommate thought he’d be helpful by bringing Bo over with him while transporting his personal belongings to the new property. Without thinking, he simply placed Bo in the car without utilizing a cat carrier for the journey. Upon arrival, he opened the car door to get out and before he knew what was happening, Bo bolted from the vehicle and disappeared into the night.

For six weeks, David despaired over ever seeing his best friend again. He scoured the streets every day, putting fliers and food out, even leaving blankets and clothing in the garage with the door slightly open, hoping to lure Bo back home again – all to no avail. David even visited the local animal shelter weekly, praying that someone had turned Bo in. They didn’t.

One fateful evening, David’s roommate came rushing in, yelling that Bo was in the garage. David immediately rushed out to find his fur baby crying with excitement at being back with his daddy. Blessedly, the long lost prodigal had eventually found his way home – a little skinnier but grateful to be back where he belonged.

From that day forward, Bo never went outside again.

Over the next 3-plus years, Bo accompanied David on countless car rides. Never content to sit in a carrier or ride shotgun, Bo considered himself the navigator, sitting on David’s lap throughout the journey – only venturing off for an occasional drink, snack, or use of his accompanying litter box. After doing so, Bo immediately resumed his spot, fully understanding that David couldn’t drive anywhere without his guidance. Bo took his navigator job seriously, as did David.

This oft-repeated practice led Bo to be on David’s lap that sunny October day as he drove to visit me for the first time. David had left his kitty at his younger brother’s house in FL while he served with Samaritan’s Purse. The two were almost to the Florida-Georgia line when my text came in. David said he laughed out loud when he saw my message. He remembers telling Bo, “Wait until she sees this,” as he sent me the photo of them together.

As if receiving a text message with a cat on his lap wasn’t enough to stun me, David shocked me further when he showed up at my front door with Bo nestled in his arms. I’ll never forget Bo’s big eyes staring back at me when I opened the door that day. To say that Bo was unique barely scratches the surface of the larger-than-life persona captured inside his tiny fur body.

Bo lived with David during his time renovating Herm and Nancy’s home in Ft. Myer’s, FL, following Hurricane Ian’s decimation of their property. Despite the loud noises of David’s air compressor and high-pressure nail gun, Bo slept on David’s air mattress in a construction zone for nearly 4 months as if it was nothing.

I witnessed this un-cat-like behavior for the month I lived in this space while helping with the rebuild – and it never ceased to amaze me. We only let Bo venture out of his temporary bedroom in the evenings – after Herm and Nancy had settled down with their Shih Tzu, Gigi, in their room. Bo would walk around, smell everything we’d worked on during the day, and calmly return to the bedroom for the night. Knowing we’d passed his inspection each evening meant a lot to us. In every way imaginable, Bo was one cool cat.

As quiet as a dormouse, Bo never cried or uttered a sound until he came to live with me during the final phases of David’s renovation. David had proposed to me a month and a half before, and we knew Bo would eventually need to learn to get along with my two kitties, so I began socializing him while David finished his FL work. I had lost my dear Rocky a few months prior and was happy to have sweet Bo with me.

It was during this interval that Bo discovered his voice. He soon learned that by yowling in the morning, he would get fed whenever he wanted to. To prevent being woken up at night by Bo’s new yacking, I’d keep him in my bedroom with extra kibble. There was no question who was in charge at that point. It was always Bo.

While I was concerned that this older, furry gentleman would be overwhelmed by my younger, bigger, and more excitable fur baby, Leo, it didn’t take long for Bo – a formerly mild-mannered cat who had been picked on by his former roommate, Monroe – to express his hierarchy. A few swift whacks to Leo’s giant Maine Coon head taught Leo to respect his elders and give Bo deference whenever he walked into the room.

Bo also had a way of luring Leo in for a sneak attack. Occasionally, he would unexpectedly walk over to groom Leo’s head, giving him a false sense of security and causing David and I to gush over the peaceful scene before us.

It was only when Leo, David, and I least expected it that Bo would whack Leo in the head, causing peals of laughter to spring forth from David and me. Leo would always shake off the whack in disbelief, learning another lesson of respect from his dominant older brother.  

Bo was like that – full of unexpected acts of hilarity and intelligence. He used to walk laps around the kitchen table while David and I would eat. We knew he wanted more kibble, so we encouraged him to walk “just one more lap” while we ate before we rewarded him with extra food. He’d often sit after the first few laps, giving David and me his big “kibble eyes.”

“One more lap,” I’d encourage. “You can do it, Bo!” He always did.

Bo also proved that you’re never too old to learn new tricks. With just a bit of encouragement, David and I taught Bo to stand on his back legs and stretch “up” into our outstretched hands for head scratches and treats – or even to balance a small toy on his head – no small task for a cat with a tripod leg.

I remember the first time David sent me a picture of Bo with his left leg stretched out as he sat. “Have you ever seen a cat sit like this?” David asked. While I hadn’t, I was puzzled over what would cause him to do so. During Bo’s time living with me before David and I got married, I realized Bo couldn’t bend his back leg and tuck it to sit as most animals do. I suspected that it had been broken at some point in his mysterious past.

Despite my theory, our vet told us that Bo had a “moveable kneecap,” which prevented him from bending and sitting normally. Instead, Bo would frequently squat on his haunches – always looking as if he was waiting for us to place a tiny chair beneath him. I took dozens of pictures of him with his outstretched tripod leg, as we called it. Such scenes always made me smile.

It was during that same vet visit that we learned that Bo had kidney disease. That explained his compulsion to drink water to excess. Although we placed him on a special diet, Bo never liked his dietary food. We eventually gave in and fed him what he wanted, supplemented with extra water and mashed pumpkin for a boost of nutrition and moisture. Water was always crucial to Bo’s good health. We’d often find him with his head stuck in the toilet, drinking the cool water – despite the numerous water bowls and cat fountain we’d gotten him. He gained weight, thriving for another year and a half before his medical condition caused a slow deterioration.

David frequently “boxed” with Bo, gently patting his kitty’s face until Bo would swat at David – completely without menace. Even when he’d get irritated with David and mouth him to prove he was the superior fighter, he’d always do so without absolute gentleness.

Back in August, I kept Bo with me while David returned to VA Beach to work on his house renovation. Bo’s appetite had decreased, and I gave him three meds daily. I couldn’t get up the nerve to stick him with a needle to give him the lactated ringers the vet had said we could give him at home. The extra fluids were intended to keep Bo from getting dehydrated and help flush the toxins out that his kidneys weren’t. Despite the meds, Bo was losing weight and getting weaker every day.

A week after David left, I drove Bo and my other kitties up to VA Beach to what I thought would be Bo’s last days. Instead, Bo thrived on the car ride, as he always had. Upon arrival, David and I immediately gave Bo his subcutaneous fluids. He miraculously recovered – eating well, gaining weight, and even lapping David and me again as we ate.

I’ll never forget the joy in David’s voice when he boxed with Bo again one evening. It was what we were praying for – just a little bit longer with Bo – boxing, lapping, and yowling for kibble in the early morning. God gave it all to us, and we were so grateful. We thanked God daily for our extra time with Bo – knowing he would tell us when he was ready to go.

He eventually did.

When Bo stopped eating – despite the appetite stimulant I placed on his ears every day and all the different types of food I tried to entice him with – we knew it was time. In abject sadness, David made an appointment with a former vet in VA Beach for the following day.

We learned we had gone to the wrong vet’s office when we were in the exam room. Even though we were in the wrong place, the staff gave us exactly what we needed on this day, even surprising us with a clay print that will forever serve as a reminder of the paws that walked all over our hearts.

I swore my heart was ripping open as we said goodbye to our sweet Bo-man that day, but we gave him to God, telling him that he was in good hands as we let him go from our earthly lives. David made him a casket, and we swaddled him inside it for the journey home to GA. His earthly shell may rest in our garden, but we believe he is now running around in heaven – completely healed of his trick tripod leg. We know we’ll see him again there one day.

Isaiah 11:6-9 tells us that, “The wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling[a] together; and a little child will lead them. The cow will feed with the bear, their young will lie down together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox. The infant will play near the cobra’s den, and the young child will put its hand into the viper’s nest. They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain, for the Earth will be filled with the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea.” Such beautiful assurances speak to animals being in heaven. I feel confident we’ll see all those we shared time with on Earth when we’re there.

God may only bless our lives with our fur babies for a short time, but that doesn’t mean the lessons they teach us are any less significant by their duration. Bo taught us to love deeply and to laugh every day. He personified faith and trust, no matter how many times we stuck him with needles or asked him to hold on.

Our Heavenly Father does the same with us. We might not like the pricks or appreciate the patience God is cultivating in us – but we know it’s all for our own good.  Like Bo, we are blessed with every good day we have on this Earth. Thank God for a Savior who loves us.

And thank God for the blessing of love and furry companions that bring sunshine and light into our earthly existence. What a Savior we serve! We are so grateful for His incredible compassion and the promise of a brighter tomorrow.
Hallelujah Day

Hallelujah Day

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“The Lord reached down from on high and took hold of me; He drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support. He brought me out into a spacious place; He rescued me because He delighted in me.” (Psalm 18:16-19)

In my last post,Journey Out of Nineveh, I detailed my decision to quit my job and trust God with whatever came next. One day after making that decision, David received an offer on the house we’d spent nearly two years renovating. While we eventually turned down the initial offer, we accepted another full-priced bid one week after putting a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard. God provided me with a safety net after I followed His direction to end my employment with an organization that I knew was facilitating anti-Godly practices. His provision astounded me and surpassed my expectations. What came next proved even more incredible than David’s house sale.  

After spending two weeks in Marshall, NC, to support my former role in person, I knew something had to give. Halfway through the 96 hours I put in during my first week on site, I checked my inbox before collapsing into bed that evening. In my mail was a LinkedIn message advising me of jobs the app presumed I might be interested in. I knew I didn’t have an active job search running, yet a mailing with prospective positions was waiting for me in my mailbox, just the same.

When I opened the message, I was shocked that one of the first recommended roles was for an executive assistant position at the company I’d just left less than two months before. Could this ad be for my old job? Where did this mailing come from?

I shared the news with David the following day as he prepared to drive to Marshall so we could serve with Samaritan’s Purse in Asheville the next day. The upcoming activity helped me get through the week. Knowing that David would be with me soon kept me energized. I was equally overjoyed at the prospect of showing God’s love to hurting North Carolinians whose homes had been damaged by Hurricane Helene.

“I’m thinking of reaching out to my old boss to ask him about this job listing,” I told David.

“Go for it, love!” David replied. “You need to get out of there.”

And so, I did.

After a night of waiting for a response from my former boss, I wrote to him again the following day as David and I drove to the Billy Graham Headquarters to begin our day’s activities. This time, I wasn’t so subtle. My text advised my previous manager – a friend and fellow believer – that I wanted to return to the company. I also inquired about the open position I’d seen online. I knew the time for subtlety was over. He immediately responded.

David and I felt privileged to visit The Cove at the Billy Graham Training Center in Asheville, NC, before our days serving with Samaritan’s Purse.

Unfortunately, he said the position was not to support him, so he advised me to apply through standard channels. While I attempted to do so that evening, the posting had already been taken down online.

After sending out a few more inquiries with former colleagues, I learned the open role would support a higher executive than I did previously. Compelled to continue, I created a cover letter, updated my resume, and sent everything directly to the executive seeking a new assistant. In my mailing, I advised him that while the job posting had disappeared, I remained wholeheartedly interested and would consider myself incredibly privileged to support him.

A day later, the recruiter conducting this job search advised me that the position was a hybrid role, not remote and that I needed to live in Ohio to be considered. I asked if an exception could be made and was told it couldn’t. I thanked her and asked her to keep me in mind if anything changed.

My friends and former executives told me not to give up. I assured them I wouldn’t – and began earnestly praying for God to make His plans known. No matter what, I wouldn’t stop seeking His will. As I always do when requesting my Heavenly Father’s guidance, I ask Him to open or shut the door completely. Amid my prayers, I gathered hope when the executive I’d written to replied to me, himself, and said he’d be in touch. Still, I surrendered anew and committed to waiting for God’s direction.

The week before Christmas, just a day after submitting my two-week notice of resignation and three days after God blessed us with David’s original house offer, the same recruiter that told me the position required me to live in Cleveland, wrote me again, revising her statement to say that the position was now open to being remote. She ended by saying that she wanted to speak to me. I immediately called her.

A half-hour later, I was scheduled for a virtual interview with the executive in question – just two days before Christmas. I couldn’t have been more excited – nor could I have thanked God more for this complete change in circumstance that His hand had provided.

The morning of my interview, I reached out to one of my current colleagues – a young lady whose father is a Samaritan’s Purse chaplain. Throughout the past months, I had struggled with her presumed wholehearted acceptance of the New Age concepts I’d so viscerally rejected as a Christian. I had recently notified her and my other team members of my impending departure and wanted her, in particular, to know why I was leaving. I was also hoping to understand better why she’d so wholly embraced the non-Christian principles I knew her evangelical father rejected.

While my friend respectfully listened as I shared my concerns about the New Age practices she was embracing, she remained unfazed at my revelations – including those about her company’s partnership with the reincarnationists at the Researchers of Truth I detailed in my blog – The Lost World of New Age Religion. I encouraged her to call me back to discuss her faith. She never did.

As I hung up, I told David how disheartened I was, saying, “I gave her every opportunity to affirm our shared faith. She never did.”

“You did all you could, love,” David said. “She heard your heart. The rest is up to her.”

Realizing how close I was to my interview time, I began to panic. I’d not prepared much for this important interview, and my eyes were a puffy mess from crying. “If I get this job, it’s because of God,” I told David. “I’m just giving it all to Him.”

“You’ve got this,” David said. “He’s going to love you!”

Forty-five minutes later, I was all smiles. “Our time ran over and he never rushed,” I told David. “I feel good about everything – but it’s all up to God.” I had no idea what would happen next.

Every Christmas Day, I send all my friends digital messages of God’s love. This year, I felt led to do the same with the executive I’d soon be leaving, even though I know she’s an atheist. After praying with David and asking God to bless my words and open my boss’s heart, I sent her a link to Matthew West’s song, “Because of Bethlehem.” My accompanying text read, “This is why I am blessed. This is the love that exists in every fiber of my body. I am who I am because of Bethlehem.”

I had no idea how she’d respond, but I followed the Holy Spirit’s prompting to send the message. This beautiful song contains the gospel message wrapped up in a four-and-a-half-minute video, and I knew she needed to hear it. I prayed with David before sending the video – asking God to open her heart to His love. A half-hour later, I received her two-word response: “So beautiful.”

While I didn’t expect much, knowing that she’d watched the video made me happy – and I told her so. Through my tears, I thanked her for listening while affirming my love for her. I hope that she will see my love as the living embodiment of God’s.

My new prayer is that my former boss’s eyes will be opened, and she will know Christ’s love, herself, one day. I can only hope that my words, actions, and prayers will long be remembered now that I’m gone. My earnest belief is that they will think about my testimony in the days to come and wonder about the person who was the first to quit their company and their culture – or so my former boss told me. I hope they heard my reasons for doing so and will never forget my unflinching faith.

David’s beautiful hand-built barn/shed behind his VA Beach house stands as a testament to his amazing skills.

On January 2nd, 2025, our move-out day had finally arrived. David and I picked up a 26-foot U-Haul truck that morning and began loading it in the frigid wind, thanking God anew for bringing us to this incredible day I’d often wondered if we’d ever see.

“Loading Day” began with our initial load of David’s piano onto the 26′ U-Haul truck.

My last day at my company was Tuesday, December 31st – and the missing weight from my shoulders was palpable. I can hardly express how freeing it was to let that job go and re-surrender everything to my Savior. January 2nd was “Loading Day.” David and I were excited to begin the next chapter of our lives in the new year – giving everything anew to our Heavenly Father.

David’s Canadian canoe and a score of tools rapidly filled the space in our moving truck.

When we sat down to lunch that day, I looked at my phone and realized I’d missed a text from the recruiter at my former job. “Call me when you can,” was all the message relayed.

“Call her now! And don’t go in the other room,” David exclaimed. “I want to be here when you call her back.”

David’s blue and grey house, built in 1962, used to be white and red before his painting, custom-built front deck, shutters, new roof, and timbered landscaping completely changed the look of the property.

“I will,” I responded, “but you must be quiet. They want someone professional in this role so there can’t be any noise in the background. Not even chewing,” I told David.

Less than a minute later, I pumped my fist in the air, and David yelled, “Hallelujah!”

We both laughed with joy. So much for professionalism, I thought, even as I, too, shared in the enthusiasm.

“I’m sorry,” I told the recruiter. “That was my husband, and we’re both just excited.”

She laughed and exclaimed, “That’s okay. Woo hoo!”

After hanging up, I stared at David in disbelief. “I just quit my job two days ago,” I said. “And now this? The recruiter didn’t even tell me what they’d pay me – saying she’ll let me know when my soon-to-be new boss returns from his Christmas vacation. He told her not to wait, and to begin onboarding me. What a God we serve!”

“Loading Day just turned into Hallelujah Day!” I declared to David as tears fell down my face. “Yay, God!”

“Yay, God,” David affirmed with tears in his eyes. “Look at what He has done!” After laughing, hugging, and rejoicing, I thought my face might explode from smiling.

That night, David and I sold his primary bedroom set after listing it on Facebook Marketplace. The buyer was a Panamanian Christian who brought friends from her church to help her load the bedroom set in her truck. She is a single mom and needed the set for a friend coming to visit her in a few weeks. I couldn’t help testifying to her, too – telling her how quickly we’d sold the house and how God had just given me a new job that day.

This beautiful space used to be a single-car garage before David converted it – floor to ceiling – to a bonus room with all new electrical outlets, a full walk-in closet, Pergo flooring, recessed lighting, and side-yard exit.

“Amen,” she said. “God is good!”

“We can never outgive our Heavenly Father,” I replied. “His grace is greater than any of us could ever imagine!” I rejoiced anew at how God had helped us sell David’s final furniture to another one of His children who needed it. My testimonies are overflowing, as is God’s mercy.

The next day, David and I spent the morning finishing our packing. While I commented that we might want to stay another day, David was ready to head to GA.

David’s fully renovated kitchen features granite counters, stainless steel appliances, custom-tiled backsplash, a ceramic-tiled floor, kitchen pass-through wall, and a hidden pocket door to separate it from the new bonus room.

After finishing our final cleaning, I was eager to start our 9-hour drive south. David stopped me. “We need to pray before we leave.”  

As David and I stood in the living room of the home we were preparing to leave, we knew that our Heavenly Father had blessed us above and beyond anything we could have ever imagined. Through his tears, David thanked God for every step of the journey that had led him to surrender his life to His Savior.

David and I said our final prayer of thanks to God while standing in his renovated living room. His sculpted arch doorways and custom-built pass-through wall lead to the bedrooms and bath (left) and kitchen (middle back).

David spent the last forty-four years living in VA Beach – lonely and unsatisfied. It took his complete surrender to Christ for our Heavenly Father to bring us to that moment. None of this might have happened without God’s grace and unfathomable love. We might have missed all our current blessings had each of us not been willing to yield our will to our Creator.

David and I raise our arms to shout “Yay, God” for the kazillionth time in celebration of his house sale and our completed project.

Two hours later, while following David in the moving truck, I received a call from the recruiter with the payment offer she told me she wouldn’t have until the following week. I nearly drove off the road when she told me my new hourly wage.

The offer they were giving me was more than they had listed in the job description. It was more than I ever thought I’d ever make – even with annual bonuses over several years. The pay she detailed was more than I could fully contemplate. How did this happen? How could this be true? When the recruiter asked me if their offer was agreeable, I told her I was just happy to be back. “Anything above receiving this job is just icing on the cake,” I responded. “You just made my year!”

As I drove down I-95 to GA in David’s SUV, I had to call David in the moving truck to share the news about God’s latest shower of blessings.

After hanging up, I called David. “You won’t believe it,” I told him. “The recruiter just called me with their offer. Whenever I feel that God has blessed me more than I deserve, He blesses me even more!” With absolute joy, I continued, “What a God we serve!”

And so, here I am, one week into my new job that God knew He’d give me when I left the company the first time. All I had to do was trust and obey – just as I did when I went to FL to serve Him in 2022. It was there after my initial act of surrender that He gave me the husband He created for me.

And now, He’s given me a job beyond anything I could have achieved alone. None of this would have happened had I not heeded God’s call to go to Nineveh and testify about my faith. Of that, I have no doubt. I would never have applied for this job had I stayed – and I don’t believe I would have received this pay outside of God’s provision. This type of blessing can only have come from my Savior.

I am more grateful than words can ever verbalize. Every time I surrender and say, “I give it all to you, Father,” He brings down blessings in such a way that I can never explain. Every time David and I pray, our litany of thanks is a mile-long.

No matter what happens, we know our Creator is at work. We trust Him with our lives and our entire existence. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

While January 2nd will always be known as my “Hallelujah Day,” I am continually blessed – every single day. God’s provision may not rain down on me with such magnitude as it did at the start of this year, but it’s always with me. Every day, I begin my prayers by thanking God for everything He’s given me: a comfortable home, a job, clothing, good health, food in the fridge, and an overflowing pantry. Healthy or sick, joyful or distressed, God is always with me – always taking care of me. Of that, I have no doubt.

As the perfect ending to a glorious day, God painted the sky with his majesty as we drove home to GA.

Most of all, I thank God for the love that surrounds me. I have the love of a God-given husband, and I have always had the same from my Heavenly Father. I know that both these loves existed before I was even born – before time began. No matter what I do or how I surrender my life to Him, I can never give back as much as I’ve received. Every day is Hallelujah Day to me.

Luke 6:38 reminds us to “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” My life is living evidence of this truth. I pray that your life also embodies the same.

God’s mercy and grace surround all of us – in abundant seasons and in times of drought. He will never leave us or forsake us. If we only surrender all to Jesus, He will always give us back more than we could ever give.

https://youtu.be/Gf8qQLGZ3o8?si=Yw51ZyM57y_sKIjG ]
Journey Out of Nineveh

Journey Out of Nineveh

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Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses. (1 Timothy 6:12)

So much has happened over the past few weeks that I can hardly put it all into words. I’m dividing my thoughts into multiple blogs to do justice to these life-changing events. This first post will begin where I left off – chronicling what happened following my decision to quit my job without a safety net.

As mentioned in The Darkness Will Not Overwhelm the Light, I lived out my missionary friend’s challenge to go to Nineveh – figuratively if not physically – and testified to everyone I could about my faith. While I will never know if my words and actions meant anything to anyone, I was far from through presenting my case to my team members.

Upon completing my business trip to London, I arrived home physically and mentally exhausted. Between an early morning flight, delayed departure, and an hour-long wait to get through Customs, I nearly missed my connection to Jacksonville, FL. While my suitcase was not so fortunate, I’m grateful to American Airline’s concierge service, which hand-delivered my bag to my home overnight – just in time for my next trek to VA Beach.

While I planned to return to help David finalize his renovations and place his house on the market, I soon learned that David had secretly finished everything while I was traveling. In fact, David had already put a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard and had a showing scheduled for the following afternoon – the very day I was driving back up to help him. After nearly two years of renovation work with considerable delays and unforeseen challenges, completion seemed incomprehensible to me.

And yet, David had done it all. Not only had he nearly single-handedly renovated his house – top to bottom – he was ready to begin showcasing his handiwork, hoping the right person might see it and purchase the property. Without any form of advertising or the use of any realty services, he scheduled someone to visit the property on his own – a staggering accomplishment, to say the least.  

After a good night’s rest, I set out with our two kitties and began my northward travel. I was excited about seeing David again and eager to tell him my plans to trust God and quit my job. I felt peace and joy on that ride, knowing that my Heavenly Father controlled everything.

It was great to know that we were finally ending the renovation work. Since David and I met, he’s done nothing but renovate and restore homes. In Ft. Myers, he and I worked and lived in the house we gutted with Samaritan’s Purse – as detailed in my blog post: “Building an ark is never easy but always worth it.”

David then went on to restore and rebuild a second home in Ft. Myers – completing all but a few small projects. He would have finished it all were it not for another essential engagement he had to keep – getting married to me just five months after we met in a disaster zone while serving with Samaritan’s Purse (see Surrender – Samaritan’s Purse Deployment, Part 7).

When our Perfectly Loved saga culminated in our wedding, the renovation work of David’s house began in earnest. One year and nine months later, we were finally ending what we’d lived with as long as we’d been married – traveling between two states each month to renovate and sell his former house. It almost seemed too good to be true, yet here we were, standing on the precipice of something extraordinary.

Fifteen minutes after David’s house showing began, I called to ask if he was parked close to see how long the Realtor took with his prospects. “They were inside with me for 15 minutes,” David replied. “They’re out back now.”

“You’re there?” I asked incredulously. “I didn’t realize that. You’re showing the house yourself?”

“Yes,” David said. “I never intended for anyone to come in without me being here.” While I was still on the phone with him, the buyers returned to ask more questions.

After they left, David called to tell me that the buyers were builders themselves who were helping their friend buy his first home. “They loved it,” David said. “It was great to hear them appreciate all the quality work I’d put into the renovation. They could totally understand my vision.”

Hearing this news made me happy, as I knew no matter what, David had received validation of his skills with this visit. “I’m so proud of you, David!” I told him. “You are amazing! No matter what happens, I’m so glad you heard this affirmation of your incredible abilities from someone who could really appreciate all your hard work.”

After hanging up, I continued my drive, even more excited than ever to see David. I sang along with every praise song on my Pandora app – eagerly anticipating sharing my decision to quit my job with my husband. I knew this was just the start of good things to come.

Less than an hour later, David called me back on Facetime – while I was driving. “Are you ready?” he began.

“Oh, my gosh,” I replied. “Tell me! I’m ready!”

“We got a full price offer!” David exclaimed. “Full price! The Realtor just called me back. He’s writing everything up now.”

“Oh, my gosh!” I replied. “I’m so happy for you, love! You deserve this so much! But wow! You just put the sign up. This is absolutely incredible!”

“It is, love,” David replied. “We did this together. And you know what this means? Quit your job, love. We’re going to be okay. You need to quit your job.”

Hearing these words spoken out loud nearly undid me. As the tears poured down my face, I was speechless. David didn’t know I’d already decided to do just that.

“David,” I was finally able to say. “You just don’t know. God is so good! I hadn’t even told you this yet, but I spent my entire flight back from London writing my next blog. I made a decision yesterday morning to give everything to God and stop saying, ‘I trust God, but…’ I wanted to tell you in person that I was going to quit and give everything to Him. And now, less than a day later, you’ve sold the house? I can hardly believe what a God we serve! Look at what great things He has done!”

As David laughed, the two of us praised our Heavenly Father together. I told him a scriptural passage perfectly summarized how I felt. Ephesians 3: 20-21 says, “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.”

I reminded David that when we surrender – just as we both did when He gave us each other in FL – He gives us more than we can ever ask for and imagine. After hanging up, I called my brother, mom, and best friend to share the incredible news with all of them. We all laughed, cried, and praised God together – all while I was driving to see my husband after one of the longest journeys of my life.

Upon arriving in VA Beach, I could hardly get out of the car fast enough to throw my arms around my husband in celebration. God had given David affirmation of his talent and abilities and brought a buyer to our home just two days after putting a yard sign out – a nearly impossible feat in a challenging real estate market.

But nothing is impossible with Christ. That fact has been consistently affirmed throughout my lifetime.

And now, my exodus from Nineveh would continue in earnest – with a new testimony affirming my stance. What I’d prayed for and had countless others pray for with me over the entire three-month period I worked at my former job was coming to fruition. I was quitting for the first time in my lifetime without another job lined up. Nevertheless, I had complete peace in doing so.

Even without David’s house sale, I knew we would be okay. But, boy, oh boy, was I glad I had decided to leave and trust God without a safety net. It makes the results even more astonishing. I trusted God, and He immediately rained down His blessings on me and David in affirmation of my faith.

The next day, I was eager to quit, but it was not meant to be. My boss returned from London extremely sick, so I needed to postpone my resignation discussion until the next day. It was hard to contain myself then, but I did so, as I knew I needed to do this the right way – face-to-face over Zoom since we couldn’t meet in person. When I finally shared the news with her, she was shocked.

I started the conversation by repeating her words from a previous team meeting. “Yesterday, you mentioned that ‘intentionality around culture is so important.’ You told us that we need to ‘feel it, breathe it, live it.’”

As she sat up in her chair, eagerly anticipating me saying that I was wholly on board, I hit her with the opposite. “I can’t do that,” I said instead.

Her face immediately altered, and she sat back hard in her chair. “I’m sorry,” she replied. “What did you say? I’m not sure I heard you.”

“I can’t do that,” I repeated. “It’s been an honor to work for you and I have great respect for you, but this isn’t the job for me. If I may, I’d like to read you something I’ve prepared in explanation.”

After expressing her disappointment and with her hand on her heart, my boss invited me to proceed.

“This role requires someone to embrace your culture,” I began. “That culture stands in direct contrast to my faith. There is a difference between the religion of Christianity and someone who has a relationship with Jesus Christ. I have the latter. As an evangelical Christian, my life revolves around my relationship with Jesus Christ. He is my Lord and Savior. Jesus is the light of the world. He saved my soul, and His blood covers my sins. I don’t need anything more than Him.”

“I don’t need to meditate on myself to feel peace,” I continued. “My JOY comes from putting Jesus first, Others second, and then myself. What I’ve seen here is that finding Self through spiritual practices is what is fostered. That mindset stands in direct opposition to my beliefs.”

“My meditation focuses on following Christ with my whole life. Doing so means everything to me. My daily walk with my Heavenly Father is what I feel, breathe, and live. It’s what my life is built upon – and there is no compromise in that.”

“You need someone in this role who embraces your culture and wants this job to be their life. That can never be me. As I said when I accepted the role, I can’t worship anything other than God the Father, Jesus Christ His Son, and the Holy Spirit. I worship the Divine Creator – not what He created, including myself. Anything apart from that is blasphemous to me and hurts my spirit. I can’t ever support that mindset.”

With all that said, I gave my two-week notice and surrendered everything to God – again. I wasn’t sure what would follow, but what my Heavenly Father gave me was astounding. Both virtually and in writing, my boss told me she admired me for standing for my faith. “You have a beautiful heart, and I admire your commitment to listening to your own inner wisdom about what is the next best step for you,” she wrote in response to my official resignation letter.

At her request, I only notified a few others I worked with about my departure – which, blessedly, came during the holidays, so many of my team members were on vacation. No matter who I wrote, I was determined to keep shining my light and praising my Savior, who I knew would sustain me. I will save a few of the responses I received for a future post.

And now, I must return to my story regarding David’s house sale, as we eventually turned down our initial offer. The buyer wanted us to pay nearly $10,000 in his closing costs – which we didn’t feel David’s hard work warranted. Stepping out in faith, we again showed the house to two more prospects. The first wanted to rent it and said he’d crunch the numbers and get back to us. He never did.

The second showing occurred after a potential buyer stopped by with her grandchildren. We couldn’t let her in as I was on a work call during her first impromptu visit. She arranged to come back a few days later with her Realtor. Before leaving, she made another full-price offer – this time without a clause for us to pay a thing. The buyer gave us her earnest money before leaving in her car. After passing two home inspections with flying colors, we sold the house – again.

This time, the buyer and her Realtor were both Christians. This time, we all gave God the praise and glory before anyone even left the house. This time, we knew God ordained the sale – just one week after we put a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard – to a buyer who didn’t even live in the neighborhood, without a Realtor to help us or with any form of advertisement other than a yard sign.

This time, our Heavenly Father brought a Christian buyer who will bring her grandchildren and a continual line of foster pets into the home that David and I always prayed would be alive and joyful after we left. We could not be more grateful!

David and I share a hug and smile while loading our U-Haul truck after selling his renovated VA Beach house.

David’s house sale will finalize mid-January 2025, and the last day of my employment was December 31st. What follows will have to wait until my next post.

Suffice it to say that God is sufficient. As 2 Corinthians 9:8 tells us, “God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” God’s Word also says, “Consequently, He is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through Him, since He always lives to make intercession for them.” (Hebrews 7:25)

I went to Nineveh and did what God asked me to do. I testified to His power and mercy before, during, and after I walked through the door of this pagan city and culture. I knew this would be a difficult journey – but God sustained me. Throughout all the tears, questioning, and prayers that I and others submitted on my behalf, I never doubted God would see me through it all. Still, the way that He did continues to astound me.

We can never outgive God – even if all we give is ourselves. Our Heavenly Father sacrificed His Son on the cross to save us from paying the cost of our sins. There can be no more extraordinary gift or significant demonstration of love than that. How could I ever keep my light – God’s light inside of me – undercover, sustaining anything other than what God asks me to?  

The answer is I can’t, and I won’t.  Hebrews 10:23 reminds us to “hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.”

God’s faithfulness sustained me through my journey out of Nineveh. God’s mercy saved me from any further days of living in an oppressive environment. God’s love held me up when I was beaten down by the spiritual forces that were battling to silence my witness. And God’s power gave me the voice to sing His praise and testify to His all-sustaining grace.

I am unashamed to give my thanks, praise, and glory to God. How could I not? Look at the great things He has done!
The darkness will not overwhelm the Light

The darkness will not overwhelm the Light

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For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41: 13)

“The darkness will not overwhelm You, but sometimes it can overwhelm us. Give Sara your strength and perfect peace. Send your angels to surround her and help her escape to the place where you want to plant her feet.” – Pastor Gerry, St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.

The first time I was approached by a recruiter on LinkedIn and invited to apply for my current position, I knew this company wasn’t one I could support. I initially turned the recruiter down as I had no desire to proceed. 

And yet here I am. 

I sometimes wonder how any of this happened. How could I have accepted a position in a place that seemed counter to my beliefs? Was I fooled, misguided, led astray, beguiled, or just foolish? 

After being approached by the recruiter again, I wondered if God wanted me there to bring His Light into the darkness. “Maybe I’m supposed to be in this role for a specific reason or purpose,” I told my husband, David. 

And so I applied – and prayed. If this isn’t what I should do, Lord, shut the door. Instead of shutting it, He blew the door right off the hinges. 

From my first interview, I testified about my faith. “I am a Christian,” I told my boss when she asked me to talk about my spiritual journey. “My faith is everything to me. It’s who I am.” I rejoiced at that testimony, knowing that no matter what happened, I had been unashamed to stand for Christ. 

I testified again to my boss before signing the agreement to work for my employer. “There are lines I can’t cross,” I explained. “I cannot offer any praise, honor, or adoration to any deity other than to God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. To do so would be blasphemy to me.” 

“I understand,” came the response. “I completely respect that.” 

And yet she doesn’t. Every day, I’m unhappy – with the job, the lifestyle, and the culture. Every day since I started, this job has been wrong for me – on multiple levels. 

After drawing that first line, my boss introduced me to a former missionary, Mark, who told me how he’d met the billionaire funding this enterprise – along with his wife, the CEO. He said that he liked and admired them. He is also fully funded by them, as well.

“Their wealth burdens them,” Mark explained. “They feel compelled to ‘do good’ with it. If I had to comment on their beliefs, I’d say they are misguided. I could also say that they are not moving in the direction that I prefer. Still, I have no qualms about their sincerity.”

Mark’s description might be the worst depiction of lost souls I’ve ever heard. “Not moving in the direction that I prefer”? Just wow. 

I’ve long suspected that Mark’s heart is not as burdened at the idolatry and spiritualism in all this as I am since he told me he’s known, worked with, and bound his organization to these philanthropists for financial reasons for years. Knowing and working with them is one thing. It’s quite another to attend their annual 2-week retreat and participate in their energy transference sessions, which Mark has done. That’s something I could never do.

Mark’s wife, he admitted, believes the organization is a cult. She is not happy with his involvement. I think he’s compromised his faith due to his shared business involvement with them since they are his corporation’s only financial backer.

What I know is that this company’s culture is entirely pagan. In addition to partnering with so-called Christian mystics who believe in reincarnation and clairvoyant healers who believe in energy transference, placing giant stones on the land and crystals throughout their offices to supposedly “transfer and receive energy,” practicing meditation sessions that involve bringing one’s “Divine Self” into one’s body, and asking “permission” from the woods before entering it, they also house a spiritual “school of consciousness” on a European property that trains future spiritualists to facilitate their practices. 

The executive director of this school notes in her biography that she is the daughter of a “full-trance medium” while wholly acknowledging that one needs “protection” during their practices. In her own words, “Old world teachers and occultists are reborn in this setting.” The more I learn, the more I know I need to get away from all of this.

While researching this school, I discovered a recorded meditation that validated everything I believed about their ungodly mindset. What I saw and heard shocked me with its mockery of God’s divinity. 

In one video, the spiritual “guide” – the school’s founder – leads listeners to “Follow the beam of Light that is anchored in your heart up into the greater source above you. Know that you are in a body of matter, and you are also a source of Light.”

“Here, in the center of the earth, you’ll find the ‘I am,'” explained the guide. “Bring the ‘I am’ up from the earth, through your inner beam of Light, and out into the heavens.”

I couldn’t listen any further – research or no research. What I’d heard was blasphemy against God, the one and only “I am” – as repeatedly referenced throughout scripture. The below references offer only a few examples of this:

  • “I am El-Shaddai — ‘God Almighty.'” (Genesis 17:1)
  • “I Am Who I Am. Say this to the people of Israel: I Am has sent me to you.” (Exodus 3:14)
  • And God said to Moses, “I am Yahweh — ‘the Lord.'” (Exodus 6:2)
  • “Be still and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” (Psalm 46:10)
  • Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. (Isaiah 41:10
  • “I am the Lord; that is my name! I will not give my glory to anyone else, nor share my praise with carved idols.” (Isaiah 42:8)
  • I, yes I, am the Lord, and there is no other Savior. (Isaiah 43:11)
  • “From eternity to eternity I am God. No one can snatch anyone out of my hand. No one can undo what I have done.” (Isaiah 43:13)
  • This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer and Creator: “I am the Lord, who made all things.” (Isaiah 44:24)
  • “Remember the things I have done in the past. For I alone am God! I am God, and there is none like me.” (Isaiah 46:9)
  • “I, yes I, am the one who comforts you. So why are you afraid of mere humans, who wither like the grass and disappear?” (Isaiah 51:12)
  • “For I am the Lord! If I say it, it will happen.” (Ezekiel 12:25)
  • “I am the Lord, and I do not change.” (Malachi 3:6)
  • Jesus answered, “I am. And in the future, you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of God, the Powerful One, and coming on clouds in the sky.” (Mark 14:62)
  • “I am the light of the world. The person who follows me will never live in darkness but will have the light that gives life.” (John 8:12)
  • Jesus answered, “I tell you the truth, before Abraham was even born, I am!” (John 8:58)
  • Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me will have life even if they die. (John 11:25)
  • Jesus answered, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. The only way to the Father is through me.” (John 14:6)
  • “Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me.” (John 14:11)
  • The Lord God says, “I am the Alpha and the Omega. I am the One who is and was and is coming. I am the Almighty.” (Revelation 1:8)

And yet, the people I work with believe they can find the “I am” in themselves, the earth below them, and the heavens. Such a thing can never be. There is only one “I am.” He is the God of all creation. You can’t find God by visualizing yourself bringing Him into your body – which is what these pagan teachings suggest. Only through accepting Jesus Christ as one’s Lord and Savior can anyone experience the true “I am.”

In hindsight, Mark was correct when he said, “You are jumping right into the deep end. You’re like Jonah entering Nineveh.” 

Ironically, Mark’s timing was nearly spot-on, too. Only a few months into my job, I traveled to the U.K. for work while my daily Bible reading led me to travel into the biblical Nineveh. Mark’s words reflected in my mind while I was there. 

I’d dreaded the trip from the first time I learned about it. I knew it would be a mental and spiritual journey, and I was right. I hadn’t been under such work duress since I traveled to France while working as the assistant to a university president eight years ago. 

With only a few hours of sleep on the overnight flight to London, I was expected to remain sunny, bright, and constantly social as we met with our U.K. counterparts for an afternoon ice skating activity that quickly became the living embodiment of my social awkwardness. The drinking began as everyone (but me) gushed over how much they loved the company. It started early, at 3:30 pm, with much imbibing of mulled wine and cocktails over the next several hours. 

London’s ice skating rink at Somerset House – surrounded by the King’s College campus.

This practice continued in earnest at the “winter party” the following evening – a party we had traveled across the ocean to attend. Apart from the cocktails, the steady stream of refilled wine glasses before, during, and after dinner rendered everyone (but me and perhaps one or two others) completely inebriated – as was evidenced by a video later circulated in our company’s group text. 

Fortunately, I strategically extracted myself from this dinner when the laughter and boisterous behavior turned into exuberant dancing. Seeing my boss move to the restroom and another team member to the cloakroom, I grabbed my coat, mouthing “thank you” to our hostess and waving goodbye while walking as fast as I could out of the exit. 

Later that evening, I dared to open the gift bags we’d been presented earlier. Amidst the bottle of champagne and notepad I received, there was a book of the Spiritual Poems of Rumi. With curiosity, I skimmed the book to determine if it was as unfettered as I presumed it would be. 

It was. 

Muhammad Balkhi Rumi was an Afghani mystic who lived between 1207-1244. During his lifetime, he served as an Islamic scholar and teacher, writing 65,000 verses – many of which were quatrains. 

A sample page from The Spiritual Poems of Rumi that was provided to me as a gift from my employer.

Some of these poems are Rumi’s exposition on the meaninglessness of life. Others speak of death and his belief that the afterlife is nothing more than a return to the collective universe, as is evidenced in his poem, Again my soul: 

the day my soul 
begins the journey
to the skies
is the day 
my body is scattered
all over the earth 
but if you write
“rise” in the ground 
with your finger 
I’ll jump out of the earth
and my body 
again will come to life

With these crazy thoughts – seemingly embraced by my company – swirling in my head, I began our next day’s venture.  

Saturday was our last day in the U.K. Our team had planned to partake in a tour of London together via a city Hop On Hop Off bus. Only 3 of the 13 people invited to participate joined me in seeing the city after the prior night’s festivities. 

A double-decker tour bus waits outside St. Paul’s Cathedral in London.

About 45 minutes into the tour, the bus stopped at St. Paul’s Cathedral, and I knew I needed to get off. It was here that I parted with my group to experience this beautiful church. After two days of associating with New Agers, I was more than ready to be in a place where I felt comfortable – God’s house.

St. Paul’s Cathedral exterior, London, England.

Upon entering the cathedral, I discovered I’d have to pay an entrance fee of 25 British Pounds to tour the sanctuary. Since I wanted to pray more than anything, I moved to the free chapel to the left of the main sanctuary. After beseeching my Heavenly Father to show me how to escape my job, a female chaplain entered the space, asking everyone what brought us to their church. 

The free chapel inside London’s St. Paul’s Cathedral, where I prayed during my trip.

When she came to me, I didn’t need to say much for her to sense the pain in my heart. She quickly moved into the pew beside me and invited me to talk. I poured out my heart to her.

Chaplain Gerry and I share a smile after she prayed with me in St. Paul’s Cathedral.

“Spiritual warfare is a powerful thing,” the chaplain began. “We need to continually ask God to give us strength even while we’re praying for His protection and guidance.” 

The chaplain, whose name I learned was Gerry, asked if she could pray for me. To my impassioned affirmation, she did so. 

Exterior front and side of St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.

“Guide Sara’s feet,” Gerry beseeched, “and show her where to plant them.” While Gerry petitioned God for my protection, she said something I’d never considered. “The darkness will never overwhelm You, [Lord], but it can overwhelm us.” 

What a beautiful reminder, I thought. I felt such strength, comfort, and relief from those words. My Savior is in control of everything. I am reminded of that fact every day. 

She could only smile when I told Gerry I’d been prayed over by a street preacher the night before and by chaplains at Samaritan’s Purse in Asheville, NC. I also explained how David and I met, which led her to ask, “What does your husband think about all this?” 

Me and the London street preachers that prayed with me during my visit.

“He told me to quit,” I replied. “As did the Samaritan’s Purse chaplain. I trust God, but it’s hard to think of quitting without another job waiting for me. I’ve never done that before.” 

“God will show you what to do,” she ended. 

I left the chapel with extreme gratitude, knowing that my Heavenly Father would continue to guide me.

The afternoon’s challenges continued as my tour bus never returned to pick up many of us who had hopped off to see Buckingham Palace. Darkness soon descended during the hour and a half we stood waiting in the cold. I knew then that I’d never return to the hotel in time for our group’s evening activities. 

After calling my boss and admitting the same, I began walking, seeking shelter from the frigid air. In addition to my distress at the bus never coming and the icy cold that had permeated my bones, I was flustered by the thought that my boss would perceive this as another failure. 

Throughout the journey, I sensed her frustration with me. I wasn’t participating. I didn’t have all the peripheral transportation items on her calendar that she wanted (a fact she texted to me while we were seated directly opposite one another during our first afternoon’s lunch).

And then there’s the fact that I couldn’t fake enthusiasm for a trip I didn’t want to be on while everyone else was excited to be there. In short, I felt angst at not performing well and realized I could never be myself at this job. 

On the last morning of our trip, I woke up with a new commitment to trust God wholeheartedly. I knew I could no longer say, “I trust God, but…”. I know I need to leave this role. It’s time for me to evidence trust with every ounce of my being – including believing that God will sustain me if I leave my job without another one already in place. 

“I do trust you, God,” I prayed that morning, tears streaming down my face. “I’m going to take that trust a step further and give this job to you. I will give my 2-week notice this week.” 

As validation of the rightness of this decision, I discovered that my boss had circulated a plan for our group to meet in January to hold a “team practice day.” Translation? She wants to facilitate an all-day activity with an “alignment meditation” as they do in the U.K. 

I previously determined that I’d never participate in one of these activities. After researching my work’s “Team Practice” page, I learned that the ideals espoused in these sessions are entirely humanistic and blasphemous. One of the alignment practices repeats the search for “The Light That I AM” that I discussed earlier in this post.

Meditative alignment practices detailed on my work’s Team Practice Page.

I’ve already found the “I AM.” He is GOD – my Heavenly Father, the Author and Finisher of everything. The Creator of all humanity is not someone I’m going to locate through the “magnetism of the earth and the current of light from the higher dimensions” that my work’s website details, nor can I breathe Him into myself of my own accord or find that the I AM is really me, myself, and I – as they seem to believe.

Instead, all I have to do is “Be still and know that I am God!” as Psalm 46:10 tells me. I have felt the presence of the Almighty I AM my entire life while my teammates are still searching for Him.

I cannot support cultural practices that are so far from God. I will no longer give any implied consent to their mindset and mission. I can now leave my job, knowing I’ve gone to Nineveh. I testified to thirteen people while I was there. I told anyone who would listen about how God brought David and I together, my surrender to my Heavenly Father, and my peace in knowing where I will go when God calls me home. All but one of these people walked away while I was talking. 

I have done my part. While I didn’t cry out in the streets as Jonah did, I now know I can leave, fulfilling my promise to stand for my faith in every possible way. It’s not up to us to save anyone. Only our Creator can do so. He just told us to obey whatever He tells us to do. 

Now is the time for me to trust that my Heavenly Father will lead me forward and that He will “place my feet where He wants them next,” as Chaplain Gerry said. That means I need to trust with my whole life – even without a safety net. While that thought frightens me beyond belief, it also fills me with peace. 

God is in control. I may never know the reason and purpose of why I was placed in this role – but that doesn’t matter. God does. I’ve done what He asked and lived out my faith in a pagan culture. I will now leave Him to move me as He chooses.

The darkness will never overwhelm the Light – and I pray it will never overwhelm me again. If it does, I will always remember this journey. 

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41:13)

I surrender my fear, understanding, and control to you, Lord Jesus. I know you will help me. I surrender all. 

Show me the next thing

Show me the next thing

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Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word. (Psalm 119: 37)

Throughout my last few blogs, I’ve shared my moral dilemma in working for a company actively promoting things that oppose my faith. New Age thinking is not something I can ever embrace. There is no symmetry between this religious lifestyle and my Christian beliefs. While I could also say the same about much of what standard corporate cultures promote, I’ve never been pushed to participate in activities that go against what I believe– until now. The bottom line is this: I cannot and will not join in anything I perceive as ungodly – in and out of the workplace. My faith is non-negotiable.

I honestly thank God for giving me such a deep sense of discernment. The father of one of my team members is a chaplain with Samaritan’s Purse – an organization that is near and dear to my heart. I initially thought her participation with this organization gave it credibility. What I’ve seen, instead, is that she, too, follows this culture rather than anything Christian she might have been taught to believe.  While I wonder if she’s seen behind the curtain as much as I have, I also witnessed her wholehearted participation and adoration of everything being promoted. That thought saddens me.

Here are a few things I’ve learned about the people my organization is partnering with over the past few weeks:

  • My boss has close ties with and endorses a husband-and-wife team of psychotherapists who perform psychedelic therapy. This treatment uses hallucinogenic or psychedelic drugs, such as LSD, to treat mental disorders.
    • My org organized Holotropic Breathwork (HB) sessions between these therapists, local firefighters, and river guides who were assisting with the recovery of bodies after Hurricane Helene hit the western NC region.
    • According to VeryWellMind.com, HB involves quickening one’s breathing patterns to achieve an “altered state of consciousness (without using drugs).”
    • Some practitioners use HB as a “spiritual practice rather than a therapeutic one,” believing that “this technique moves you forward to higher consciousness.”
  • I recently learned that my executive’s best friend claims to be a clairvoyant and “transformational healer.” In addition to helping her start her own “Center,” my boss is bringing her friend to a “partner dinner” to introduce her to our founder. The practices followed at my executive’s friend’s site are those my boss is working to implement on our property.
    • Per this individual’s website, transformational healing involves shifting energies to “unravel faulty beliefs,” a practice designed to help one “better connect with the Self.”
    • These sessions promise to help one develop a “deeper connection with the Divine.”
    • Suggested readings from this person’s website include the following:
      • Brunke. D. Animal Voices, Animal Guides: Discover Your Deeper Self through Communication with Animals
      • Ammon-Wexler, J. Pineal Gland & Third Eye: Develop Your Higher Self
      • Monroe, R. Journeys Out of the Body
      • Targ, R. The Reality of ESP: A Physicist’s Proof of Psychic Abilities
      • Stone, M. When God Was a Woman
      • Jones & Pennick. History of a Pagan Europe
      • Christ, C. Rebirth of the Goddess: Finding Meaning in Feminist Spirituality
      • Bhava, S. Transgender spirituality: Man into Goddess
      • Leloup, J. The Gospel of Mary Magdalene
      • McColman, C. The Big Book of Christian Mysticism: The Essential Guide to Contemplative Spirituality
Crane placement of the 8-ton quartz crystal.
  • After Thanksgiving, my boss texted photos to our team of the 8-ton quartz crystal placed in the woods in the perceived “energy vortex” of the land.
    • This stone was purchased in South America and took 3 weeks to ship to the U.S. and several days to be delivered to the Center.
    • The placement was guided by an Ecuadorian partner who believed it should be hidden where no one can find it to provide the “best energy and protection” to the site.
    • It took a team of five people to maneuver the giant crane into the woods, lift the crystal, lower it into the crevice, and position it in its new home.
    • The crystal stands nearly 12 feet tall and approximately 8 feet across.
A team of workers guided the 8-ton quartz rock into the land’s “vortex.”
  • A few weeks ago, a local chef we hired to cook for our founder, when she visits Marshall, started to cry after speaking to the executive chef who cooks for our CEO in the U.K.
    • When asked why she was crying, she talked about how hard it has been for her to now live in what she classified as the “Bible-belt” after having lived in Miami for years.
    • I worked with this chef during my two-week interval on campus while she catered several on-site meals. I learned that she “meditates” while cooking to “transfer [her] energy” to the food.
    • The chef also told all of us that she travels with her boyfriend around the state, providing sweat lodges at local New Age fairs. Her partner is the lodge’s “spiritual leader” whose role is to “connect individuals to the natural world and the spiritual realm.” Per momentslog.com, “The lodge represents the womb of Mother Earth, and the stones symbolize the bones of the Earth. The steam represents the breath of the Creator, and the prayers and songs carry the intentions and messages of the participants to the spiritual realm.”
Final placement of the quartz crystal.

As you can well imagine, I oppose all of the above. During my time in this role, I’ve realized that I haven’t been myself since I started this job. I can’t encourage anyone, celebrate their activities, or speak the language of my peers. While I do my job well, the nature of this work and the building of this vision is not one I can ever support. Unlike my team members, who gush over how much love and contentment they feel in their positions, I operate in survival mode.

The only bright time in the past two months was during my two weeks on-site in NC when David drove up so the two of us could serve with Samaritan’s Purse (SP) again. The base camp where we met our fellow believers was none other than the Billy Graham Training Center at the Cove, located in Asheville, NC. Driving onto this land that trains countless Christians to stand for their faith felt like coming home.

David and I were excited to assist Samaritan’s Purse after meeting our team at the Billy Graham Training Center at The Cove in Asheville, NC.

“These are my people,” I told David after seeing the familiar orange shirts of our fellow SP volunteers.

Our first day of volunteering took us to the home of a disabled woman who was raising her three grandchildren after her daughter died a few years ago. Their modular home had flooded during Hurricane Helene, so they were living in a rented trailer after spending the previous month in a local shelter. Her experience with the minimal shelter food and the dangerous aspects of living in this communal space shocked me. While she was there, she witnessed a policeman nearly shoot a dog that lunged at the officer while he was near her and her grandchildren.

The house across from where we were assisting Samaritan’s Purse in Fletcher, NC, had to be completely destroyed after being moved off its base by floodwaters caused by Hurricane Helene.

She also confessed to feeling afraid as several men dressed as women who were also living in the space started staring at her grandchildren – even following them into the public restrooms. The experience made her grateful to be home and reminded me of all the comforts I often take for granted.

While helping this needy mother and grandmother, we facilitated the total clean-out and gutting of her home to assist in salvaging whatever we could for her.

A familiar debris-pile soon formed outside this modular home, whose interior was completed destroyed by Hurricane Helene flooding.

During our lunch break, one of my fellow SP team members introduced herself to us. Shortly after she did so, I asked her to pray for my peace of mind regarding my job situation. After explaining the predicament I now find myself in, my sister-in-Christ objectively stated that my “presence helps [my employer] feel better about what they’re doing.” After talking, we prayed for my wisdom to know what to do and continued our work.

Flooding caused the floor tiles to buckle and nearly all belongings to be ruined in this Fletcher, NC, home.

Later in the day, SP Rapid Response Team chaplains stopped by to visit the homeowner and site. As they walked by me, one asked how I was doing. That was the only prompting I needed to share all that weighed heavily on my heart. After we prayed, the chaplain told me he didn’t need to advise me on handling this situation.

Despite severe flooding, an angel statue still watches over the back yard of this Fletcher, NC, home.

“I can see how much this is troubling you,” he said. “I believe you already know what to do. I think you should quit and trust all of this to God.” When I explained that I never quit without another job lined up, he said he’d continue praying for me. “You can serve God anywhere,” he said. “You don’t have to put yourself through all this to share His light with others.”

After the chaplain left, I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. We came to minister to others, and instead, I was ministered to! The whole experience left me feeling uplifted and encouraged.

I’ve since prayed with our pastor in VA Beach and continued to surrender and petition God for His help.

I now know that I need to leave my current role. I’m praying hard that my heavenly Father will open the right door for me to go where He wants me to be next. I’ve applied for a position with my former employer and continue sending out resumes nearly daily. I trust my Savior to lead me and know He will – in His time.

This abandoned car’s seats, floor, and interior remain caked with mud when flood waters receded following Hurricane Helene.

Mid-December, I’m scheduled to travel to the U.K. with the rest of my U.S.-based team, where we are to participate in an abridged “team practice” day, followed by a Winter Party hosted by our founder. While I know I should be excited by this prospect, I dread it. I’m now praying that God will give me the right words to say at the right time to testify to my faith, whatever it costs me.

In the meantime, I’ll repeat: my faith is non-negotiable. All the way, my Savior leads me. I know He is with me every step of the way. I am confident that all of this will lead to an even more extensive testimony on my part. I am ready to reflect His light and love where I am and wherever He leads me.

David and I share a smile near the Samaritan’s Purse truck we worked from in Fletcher, NC.

I am never alone, nor are any of us. With God at our side, we can conquer any mountain – or even those who think the mountain’s energy comes from strategically placed rocks. God is in control of all of it. I am ready to do whatever God chooses to be the next thing in my life. 

Show me the next thing, Lord Jesus.

The conscience clause

The conscience clause

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You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. (James 4:4)

In today’s world, we are consistently asked to be tolerant of the beliefs of others. Unfortunately, tolerance seldom extends to those who have strong Christian beliefs. Instead, we are often told that Christianity is bigoted, intolerant, unloving, and discriminatory. Worse yet, Christians are consistently pushed to co-exist with other faiths. Even Pope Francis recently told a group of students that “all religions are a path to God.” I couldn’t disagree more.

Jesus said, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'” (John 14:6) I don’t know about you, but I will always heed Christ’s words before following anyone else’s guidance – even the Pope’s.

Jesus further instructed us to “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate, and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” (Matthew 7:13-14)

In my last post, I expressed my thoughts regarding how challenging it is for me to be pushed into New Age practices, including guided meditation, yoga, and spiritual banter, including talk of energy transference and “listening to the land.” If my faith was not so strong, perhaps I could go along with and participate in any of these activities or discussions without it meaning anything to me. It is, therefore, I can’t. Of additional consideration is the all-consuming, participatory expectation of this environment.

Throughout my career, I’ve grown accustomed to corporate offerings residing on a different level than the one in which my faith exists. Social activism, DEI initiatives, CRT training, and all things Pride and LGBTQ+ have become the norm in every environment I’ve ever worked in. These ideals regularly exist as part of the secular culture in today’s world. The one big difference between my former workplaces and where I am now is that no one ever made such activities and thoughts a mandatory part of my work.

This company is different. I’ve come to understand that embracing the spirituality of my new employment is the “mission” – which is not something I can ever do. In fact, my boss just told me to invite every on-site employee to a somatic yoga session she’s hosting while our CEO is in town. She balked when I suggested making some of our maintenance team members optional. “If you make them optional, they won’t come,” she told me. “I want everyone there. You’re the only exception since you won’t be in town.” It couldn’t be any plainer than that.

Fortunately, my Christian ideals will not allow me to fake acceptance of this culture. Instead, it has become oppressive to me. I use the word “fortunate” to describe my position, as there is a comfort in knowing that my faith is mightier than my workplace survival instincts.

I don’t think in terms of gray regarding faith and spirituality – nor does the Word of God. The Ten Commandments are unflinching rules given to humanity by our Creator. They are not suggestions.

Ephesians 6:16 tells us to “take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.” I’ve been under significant spiritual attack since accepting this job. The devil has been shooting arrows at me since I first considered this role. While I initially believed God wanted me to walk through this door, I now think it was the devil who opened it. He knows he can’t steal my salvation, but he has tampered with my joy. I’m in a great time of testing to stay patient and focused on my Savior – despite the demonic attacks that are plaguing me.

Tolerance is one of the deadliest arrows in Satan’s arsenal. He uses it to water down the Gospel and confuse those not entrenched in His word. After all, what could sound more aspirational than tolerance? Isn’t it something we should all seek? Won’t tolerance bring more souls to Christ?

I’m afraid not. You see, God’s Word is incontrovertible. It’s also hard, at times, and we don’t always understand it.

But that’s okay. God is God. His power, dominion, and sovereignty are irrefutable. We shouldn’t want Him to be more acceptable to us. Instead, we should continually strive to do all we can to honor and revere His authority over us and all creation.

God is omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient. That thought gives me comfort. I want assurance in knowing that my Heavenly Father controls everything. I’ll say it again: God is in control of everything. That means that since He created us, He also knows what’s best for us and loves us with everlasting love. Nothing could ever be more significant or formidable than that.

I honor, respect, and serve my Creator. He loved me before I was born. How can I not give every portion of my existence back to Him – including how I spend my days working on this earth?

I want my life to be pleasing to my Savior. God hates sin – with a passion. He told us that we should do the same. Here are just a few passages regarding this reality:

  • You must not live according to the customs of the nations I am going to drive out before you. Because they did all these things, I abhorred them. (Leviticus 20:23)
  • For you are not a God who is pleased with wickedness; with you, evil people are not welcome. (Psalm 5:4)
  • I abhor the assembly of evildoers and refuse to sit with the wicked. (Psalm 26:5)
  • Let those who love the Lord hate evil, for He guards the lives of His faithful ones and delivers them from the hand of the wicked. (Psalm 97:10)
  • I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it. (Psalm 101:3)
  • If we claim to have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. (1 John 1:6)
  • Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. (Ephesians 5:11)

That last verse has become one of my life verses. I’ve always been careful about who I associate with.1 Corinthians15:33 says, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.'”  Shouldn’t this standard also apply to those I spend my workday with? Should the work I support be any different than the company I choose to spend my time after work with? I don’t believe so. Not if I can help it.

A week ago Sunday, our director of energetic net offerings shared photos of a place he frequently visits in the mountains called Amadell. The location is about an hour away from our organization’s land. Following his photo-send, the director shared two pages in a book called The Spiritual Reawakening of the Great Smoky Mountains by Page Bryant. In his message, my team member called the location a “place for deep rejuvenation and meditation,” claiming that “the energetic clarity of that place is world-class.”

The Great Smoky Mountains as seen from the trails of Amadell, NC.

He also offered to take our team on a “pilgrimage” to Amadell, remarking that “this sacred site is not to be missed.”

Bryant, Page. The Spiritual Reawakening of the Great Smoky Mountains. Mystic Mountain Center, 1994. P. 93.

Following the photos were two pages taken from this book – one of this director’s new “favorites.” Ironically, these passages provide a more accurate portrayal of how my coworkers think and talk than anything I could ever describe on my own.

Per Bryant, “When I viewed Shining Rock Mountain clairvoyantly, I ‘saw’ that the peak has an indwelling spirit force unlike any I have ever seen. This great Mountain Deva appears to have a sheer, transparent form with great white wings and a pale complexion. Its crystal-like eyes radiate pure light like prisms. I felt a powerful and ancient energy being emitted by this Deva, a sound that is similar to a shrill, high-pitched whistle.

“I also sensed a ‘presence’ at Cold Mountain. It was a Being who appeared wrapped in a silvery cocoon-like aura that glimmers in the light of the sun and moon. I also sensed the mountain sending out an audible vibration that sounded like the howling of wind and I felt very strongly that the wind spirits frequently center themselves around the area. Both Shining Rock Mountain and Cold Mountain are wonderful places for recharging yourself on every level: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Crystal from Shining Rock (and the area surrounding it) would serve as a wonderful energy-giving sacred object when worn on the person, or when carried in a medicine bag, or held in the hand during ceremony. Physically, it would charge the body when one is experiencing low vitality. However, should you decide to take a small piece, remember to ask permission from the mountain first and leave an appropriate offering in its place.” (p. 94)[1]

Bryant, Page. The Spiritual Reawakening of the Great Smoky Mountains. Mystic Mountain Center, 1994. P. 94.

Before I go further, let me point out all the pagan references in the above passages.

  1. The author speaks of viewing the mountain “clairvoyantly “– meaning he was having an out-of-body experience at the time, or one in which he viewed things beyond his normal sensory perception.
  2. When Bryant refers to Cold Mountain as a “Deva,” he does not mean a prima donna or someone who thinks highly of themself. Per Symbolsage, “Devas are celestial beings that appear in Hinduism, Buddhism, and Zoroastrianism. They are described as “complex beings, with varied powers and roles.”
  3. The crystal structure of Shining Rock Mountain is considered a “sacred object” by Bryant, with special powers that can be captured, if allowed by the mountain itself and retained by whoever is fortunate to obtain a piece of it.

All of this sounds eerily similar to my boss’s new belief we should also “ask permission before crossing the threshold” of the woods that fill our company’s land. While this New Age speech is something I’m becoming more accustomed to hearing, it never ceases to amaze me at its absurdity. Who am I asking permission from? The trees? The land? The spirits they believe exist in the space? Whatever they perceive, it’s all God – even if they can’t acknowledge His presence.

Last Wednesday, my boss emailed me and our general manager affirming her desire for our team to visit Amadell as part of the new monthly, all-day “practice” sessions she wants to begin – mirroring what our U.K. team does. I couldn’t even respond.

Today, I am covering all this with prayer – even as I’m actively working to escape from this environment.

In the meantime, if necessary, I will stand firm in my faith and enact a conscience clause over these directives. Like Jack Phillips, the Colorado baker who refused to bake a wedding cake for a same-sex couple years ago, or Kim Davis, the county clerk who denied marriage licenses for the same purpose, or Dr. Eithan Haim, the Texas whistleblower who is being sued for reporting that the Texas Children’s Hospital was still performing gender surgeries on minors despite his state’s new law prohibiting the same, I, too, can’t go against my conscience to do something at work that violates my faith. While my ordeal may not be as dramatic as theirs, my predicament is no less burdensome.

For now, I’m praying for a miracle: a true divine intervention, an act of God. I serve an all-powerful Creator who knows the trouble that fills my soul at every new workplace revelation. Every day, I learn more about the beliefs, ideals, and intentions of our Center. Trust me. It’s not good. There is much more to say, but it must wait until next time.

Proverbs 28:5 reminds us, “Evildoers do not understand what is right, but those who seek the Lord understand it fully.”  What my team members are doing may seem perfectly normal to them. To me, it can never be.

For you, my readers and friends, this may not seem like much of a dilemma, but for me and my conscience, it is. The bottom line is that this work feels as abhorrent to me as if I was working for a palm reader or a pimp. I can no more align myself with that type of environment than I can with this one.   

I will leave you with these verses that summarize my stand. “Do not let my heart incline to any evil, to busy myself with wicked deeds in company with men who work iniquity and let me not eat of their delicacies! Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it. Yet my prayer is continually against their evil deeds.” (Psalm 141:4-5)

[1] Bryant, Page. The Spiritual Reawakening of the Great Smoky Mountains. Mystic Mountain Center, 1994.

For God hasn’t given us a spirit of fear

For God hasn’t given us a spirit of fear

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For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7)

A friend of mine recently reached out to ask if everything was alright. “I noticed you haven’t posted a blog in almost a month,” he observed. “Is everything okay or are you just busy?”

In response, I explained that between helping my husband, David, in VA Beach, two hurricanes, ending my former job, starting a new one, and my mom and brother coming for a three-week visit, it’s been a bit challenging to find time to write.

More than that, my new job has been completely overwhelming. While I started three blogs in three weeks, working 10–12-hour days while learning a new remote position and having virtually no work/life balance has been a more significant challenge than I ever could have anticipated.

As a start-up with a UK base, provision had yet to be made to provide me with a work laptop or mobile phone, for one thing. The expectation was for me to work from my personal devices – something I’d never anticipated doing in this or any other job.

Additionally, while I’m working remotely, my US home base is located in Marshall, NC – an area decimated by Hurricane Helene. In addition to the loss of life we discussed daily, the 27 feet of flood water that came raging through the town from the French Broad River blew out windows, twisted metal train tracks, and washed away complete sections of major highways. The devastation was unfathomable.

Main Street in Marshall following flooding from the French Broad River after Hurricane Helene raged through the area. (October 1, 2024). Photo credit: Josh Morgan, USA TODAY

The text messages from my teammates came hard and fast around the clock during this interval. Talk about starting a job in a windstorm. This was it! My first month of work was far from “normal,” as a result. Each of us helped with disaster response in our own way. Even in faraway GA, I made countless calls, documented local agencies that could help victims, and met virtually with my team members daily to discuss my company’s work to provide construction equipment, manpower, and resources to those working on the ground.

More than that, I was thrust headlong into the spirituality that permeates my new employer’s mission -without gentle ease of transport. While I was told that the organization’s mission is “non-denominational,” a decidedly New Age culture abounds in much of their talk and activities. It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before.

One Zoom call, for example, began with a ten-minute meditation session where all participants – including me – were asked to close our eyes, relax our bodies, and envision our spirits moving down into the earth and then back into our bodies, and up into “a golden ball of light above [ourselves].” The leader continued telling us to envision ourselves as “incredible, divine, phenomenal beings.” We were then told to return that light and energy to our “higher selves and the divine beings that [we] are.”

While I protected myself from these thoughts by praying to God throughout the session, I was stunned to be subjected to this type of activity without my notification or consent. My boss later called me to ask my thoughts regarding the experience.

“You’re my litmus test,” she said. “What did you think of it?”

After uttering a whispered prayer to God for help, I told her I appreciated the importance of deep breathing and relaxation – especially given everything our team had been exposed to during our hurricane response work.

“But what did you really think?” she asked again. “I’d like to know your thoughts.”

At that point, I explained that I had mixed reactions.

“There were things I appreciated – like the deep breathing and relaxation directions,” I replied. “But others – like talk of the divine – that go against my faith. I can’t participate in that. I just prayed through it – in my own way.”

“That’s good,” my boss said. “There are many ways to experience things. That’s all we ask.”

While I was happy to reaffirm my faith and the lines I can’t cross – much as I did before I accepted this position – by the weekend, I was frazzled, frustrated, and flabbergasted by what I would be exposed to regularly. Every day, it seemed, something new shocked me – whether by messages in group chats, emails, or meetings discussing this organization’s nature.

“I don’t know if I can do this,” I told David after a particularly challenging day. “These people don’t think like I do. How can I support it? I really felt like God was leading me here – and I told my boss exactly who I am, as a Christian, before I took this job. Sooner or later, I’m going to be asked to defend my faith, big time. I don’t know how this is going to end.”

“You do what you have to do, love,” David told me. “If you can’t do this, I completely understand. We’ll get by. I support you in whatever decision you make.”

After being emotionally overwhelmed one evening, I began watching YouTube videos of individuals talking about God. In story after story, I heard atheists and others explain how our Creator became real to them and empowered their daily lives.   

As David called me later to read our daily scripture passages together (I read the Old Testament passages, and he reads the New Testament plus a Psalm and several Proverbs), I told him what I’d watched that evening.

“I can do this, love,” I said through tears. “I need to stay plugged into scripture, music, and videos that remind me that I’m not alone in this battle. God is with me. Pastor Mark told me this would be my toughest job – and he was right. I may not yet know why God placed me in this role, but He’ll show me. I’m here for a reason. I have to stay prayed up and armored up. He’ll show me what to do.”

That was a week ago. Today, my boss asked for my input, as a Christian, regarding a potential corporately sponsored conference being considered in December.

“I’d like to have your opinion, Sara,” my boss asked. “We want to have faith leaders from the community come to this event. How do you think they’ll react?”

“I think it depends on who is speaking at the event,” I replied. My boss concurred. “I also think that hosting an event in a little over a month, asking members of the faith community to support you during the month of December, while the focus is on Christmas, may not go over well.”

“That’s also right at the start of Advent season,” I further explained. “Church leaders may not think favorably about you asking them to participate in an event to discuss the science of spirituality while they’re focusing on the birth of Christ.”

After asking me to explain what Advent is, my boss said she agreed with my thoughts and would take them back to upper management in consideration of postponing the proposed conference until after December.

“Today was a good day,” I later told David. “Today, my boss did what she said she would. She asked me to give my opinion as a Christian regarding how believers would react to their initiatives. It felt good to talk about Jesus.”

As David and I read our evening scripture, I was ecstatic at God’s written reminders to always serve my Creator and not be afraid to stand firm in my faith – even in the workplace. In 2 Timothy 1:7-8, for example, we read, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. Therefore, do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me, His prisoner, but share with me the sufferings for the gospel according to the power of God.

Hallelujah! I thought. God is always with me. I never have to fear anything the world – or workplace – throws at me.

“What a beautiful scripture,” I told David. “That’s precisely what I needed to hear today. God will always give me the right things to say at the right time. I will never be afraid to say them!”  

In further validation of God’s love and provision, our Psalm reading for the today was my favorite – Psalm 91.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “You are my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely, He will deliver you from the snare of the fowler, and from the deadly plague. He will cover you with His feathers; under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness is a shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the calamity that destroys at noon. Though a thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand, no harm will come near you. You will only see it with your eyes and witness the punishment of the wicked. Because you have made the LORD your dwelling — my refuge, the Most High — no evil will befall you, no plague will approach your tent. For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. They will lift you up in their hands so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. You will tread on the lion and cobra; you will trample the young lion and serpent. “Because he loves Me, I will deliver him; because he knows My name, I will protect him. When he calls out to Me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble. I will deliver him and honor him. With long life, I will satisfy him and show him My salvation.”

I can only say Amen and Thank you, Jesus! Forgive my fear and frustration. I know You are always with me. You placed me here for Your divine purpose. While I may not always know what that purpose is, and while my days may be challenging – full of thoughts contrary to Your Word – I know You will guide, strengthen, and empower me. I will always be your servant, and I will always trust in You. Show me Your way, Lord Jesus. Give me Your words when I need them. Let me be Your light wherever You need it to shine. Lead on, King Jesus. Thank you for loving fallible me. I am nothing without You.”

And so, I will continue to shine on, wearing my cross necklace in every meeting I’m involved in, smiling through the worldly concepts that will always fall short of the joy only God can give. I will be the “token” Christian on staff. I will shine God’s light and let Him use me however He sees fit. It’s not up to me to change anyone. I will, however, keep being who He wants me to be, and I will be unflinching in my faith – no matter the cost.
God establishes our steps

God establishes our steps

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In their hearts, humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps. (Proverbs 16:9)

Being chosen is one thing. Being selected after initially rejecting, auditioning three times, and then praying for validation with absolute certainty by God is quite another feeling entirely. Please allow me to explain what I mean.

I closed my laptop for the last time at my former job a few days ago. It still hasn’t fully hit me yet, but my life is about to change dramatically with my new employer. I was recruited for this job through an executive search company. While I will still be an executive assistant, this role is entirely different because of the corporate structure, mission, and my executive’s background. My new company is small, based out of the United Kingdom, and wholly funded by a billionaire hedge fund manager the British government knighted for his philanthropic work.

If that’s not impressive enough, the executive I will support was voted as one of Fortune magazine’s “World’s 50 Greatest Leaders” – alongside Prince Harry and Meghan Markle as well as Bill and Melinda Gates in the same year. In addition to her charitable work, serving as CEO of an organization that worked to end five of the world’s Neglected Tropical Diseases (NTDs) – ultimately administering over 700 million NTD treatments – she led international programs for Operation Smile and disaster response for International Medical Corps. With service in over 70 different countries, board service to groups such as the World Economic Forum’s Global Health Security Advisory Board, and ultimately writing a book whose forward was written by Bill Gates, there can be no question as to the extraordinary work accomplished by the woman who chose me to assist her.

How on earth did I get here? How did this role ever come to find little old me? I can only answer, “It had to be God.”  I make that statement with absolute assurance. It has nothing to do with me.

For starters, I initially turned down the role after being asked to apply. While that may sound shocking, my rationale was solidly founded. First and foremost, I wasn’t sure my faith could support the prospective company I was being asked to work for.

My faith means everything to me. After my initial research into the philanthropic organization, I said, “Thanks, but no thanks,” to the recruiter – citing pay as my rationale. The salary threshold being close to my former position’s, it was simple to decline the role with that excuse.

When the recruiter reached out again – a whole week later – assuring me that the employer could go higher, I talked to David. My initial rejection was due to my faith, but that was before a small voice inside me said there may be a godly reason why you should be there. I couldn’t discount that thought.

Countless times in my past, I have felt strongly that my Heavenly Father put me in a position to be His light in a dark place. How could I so quickly turn a similar situation down? Those thoughts filled my head even before the recruiter reached out again. “I need to apply,” I told David. “God is in control. Let’s see what happens.”

What occurred next blew my mind. After submitting my application and writing sample (required in this role), I interviewed with the third-party recruiter. I was asked to meet with the search committee for a second interview one week later. Still unsure of how I felt about the role, I nevertheless wanted to do my best.

Unfortunately, my tech wouldn’t work on the interview day, and my test Zoom call with David, who was in VA Beach then, was a complete failure. “I can’t hear anything you’re saying on the call,” David said. Try as I might, my speakers wouldn’t connect.

Minutes before the interview, I told David I needed to pray.

“You’re in control, Lord Jesus,” I said. “I’m afraid I will look like an absolute fool, but I’m giving this all to you. Please help this work out if it is Your will. Your words. My lips.”

Upon connecting, the hiring manager confirmed my fears. “I can’t hear you,” Helen (name changed) said. Praying silently and frantically again, I clicked something on my computer, and miraculously, everything was perfect. I can’t even be sure what I did. The action must have emanated from God.

Forty-five minutes into the interview, Helen noted that I’d mentioned having “a strong faith” in response to how I handle stress. I further discussed my mission trip to Nicaragua after Helen talked about witnessing global poverty – something I confirmed having also seen first-hand and been affected by.

“You mentioned your faith several times,” Helen noted. “I’m curious about your spiritual journey. You know this is a non-denominational position. Tell me about your faith and how you’d handle working with others whose own path might be very different than your own.”

“I’m a Christian,” I immediately responded. “My faith governs every aspect of my life. It’s who I am and the biggest part of my character. That being said, I completely respect the fact that everyone has to make their own spiritual journey. I will never judge anyone whose experience is different from my own.”

After the interview ended -15 minutes later than initially intended – I called David and my brother to explain what happened during the call. “I’ve never been asked about my faith in an interview before,” I gushed. “No matter what happens, I feel incredibly blessed that God allowed me to testify to what I believe in. God opened my microphone, yes, but He also gave me the voice to say, ‘I’m a Christian’ in profound way.”

A week later, the hiring manager herself called to connect with me again – this time asking me to fly to meet over Labor Day, requesting an entire day to show me around their Center and spend more time with me in in-person. After working out the specifics, my ticket and overnight accommodations were purchased, and my trip was ready to begin.

Despite the devil doing everything to keep me away – including a delayed flight, a missed connection, a canceled flight, and the inability to get an Uber from the airport after midnight – I slept a few hours. I met Helen and a few of her “guests” a short time later for breakfast.

Conversations over the breakfast table left me questioning anew whether this job was right for me.

The on-site events further solidified the same musings. Over the course of the day, I heard about the “Sound Ceremony” the group celebrated the evening before, witnessed an indigenous guest stand in the mud that was “calling him,” and learned that another guest was an astrologer who frequently gave readings to those whose events she participated in.

“These people are worshiping creation,” I later told David. “I worship the Creator. I don’t know if this could ever be right.”

The 500 acres my new employer owns in North Carolina are a testament to the beauty of God’s creation.

For this reason, I told Helen I needed some time to talk to my husband before I could accept the job offer she graciously extended to me at the end of the day. “We wouldn’t have brought you here if we didn’t think you were the one we wanted in this role,” she told me. “I think you’d be perfect for it.”

I couldn’t yet say the same, and Helen was visibly stunned by my admission. I just wasn’t sure and needed to pray.

Later that evening, after talking to David, I began earnestly petitioning God.

“Lord,” I began, “I don’t know what to do. How can this be right for me? I love Helen’s heart already, and the offer is so generous – but how can I do this?”

It was then that the thought came to me, “Tell Helen how you feel.”

I had been transparent throughout every interaction I’d had to that point – even telling Helen about my past abusive relationships, something that shocked me after my admission. Instead of being horrified at my faux pax, Helen told me she was proud of me and said she knew I would use my past to help others in the future. I had been entirely candid with Helen and knew the same thing was required regarding my faith. I needed to explain my thoughts – no matter what happened.

Hard hats were required as I visited a building under construction during my all-day interview.

On the way home the next day, I reached out to one of the chaplains I’d bonded with during my first Samaritan’s Purse work. After explaining the situation and my proposed response, my friend promised to pray that I would have clear guidance regarding what I should do and say.  

Following my discussion with David upon my return to VA Beach, I asked Helen if I could talk to her the following day to clarify an important matter. We made plans to speak the next morning.

When Helen and I spoke the following day, I explained how an activity we’d shared on-site had affected me. Two days prior, Helen and another guest had laid flowers on and around a statue I didn’t recognize. The act made me pause, step back, and pray.

“Forgive me, Jesus,” I silently petitioned. “I can’t do that. That’s not right.” After learning that the statue was of a Buddhist goddess, I knew my instincts were correct. I needed to explain the same to Helen.

I picked flowers and vegetables from one of the gardens I visited on my site tour.

“In the garden,” I began, “I didn’t know anything about Quan Yin. but I knew in my heart that I couldn’t do what you were doing. Before we go further, I need to explain there are lines I can’t cross. In Christianity, I can’t offer any worship, adoration, or token to anything other than God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That’s sacred to me. I can’t cross that line.”

“I fully respect that,” Helen said. “In fact, I’ve been thinking we need a Christian on staff to help us in decision making. We may actually take that statue out as I don’t think we should have any icons of any type if we’re going to be non-denominational. If you’d like to” she continued, “I can connect you with someone who may speak your language better than I can.”

After agreeing, Helen introduced me to Mark, co-founder and CEO of Mana Nutrition, an organization that creates ready-to-use (RTU) foods to help the world’s malnourished to survive, sustain, and thrive. Mark and his wife spent ten years as missionaries in Uganda – one of the countries they now serve with their product. Incredibly, their manufacturing facility resides about 2.5 hours northwest of where I live, and they’re currently building a warehouse near my former place of employment. This additional connection to me was profound, considering that their headquarters is in NC.

Adding to that, I was surprised to learn that Mana is primarily funded by the same billionaire that bankrolls my new company. “In fact,” Mark explained, “I’ve known [your potential employer] for the past 13 years.”  

Additionally, after hearing my story of how David and I met through Samaritan’s Purse (SP), Mark told me that Mana Nutrition is the number one supplier of RTUs to SP. God’s fingerprints are all over this work – whether they even realize it or not.

As we discussed my trepidation about the role, Mark put my fears to rest. “The way I see it, you’ve been given an opportunity to be a Jesus follower in a rare spot,” – an astute observation that immediately made me smile as it put my spirit at ease. “Think about Paul speaking to the residents in Athens who worshiped so many gods that idol-makers were everywhere. “He didn’t have to go there and talk to them, but he did. We can’t sit in a box and expect to make a difference.”

Over the next few hours, Mark and I spoke of our shared faith, willingness to go wherever God leads, and do whatever we’re asked to do. “You will be challenged more than you’ve ever been in this job,” Mark observed, “but I believe you’re being called to do it.”

I was filled with God’s presence as I walked through the woods during my site tour.

An hour later, I signed the job offer letter and spoke to Helen one last time. “I’m sending you the agreement,” I told her. “I’m so excited to accept.”

“That makes me happy,” Helen said. “I heard from my number two candidate today and she wanted to meet with me in-person. I wasn’t sure what you would say so I didn’t want to turn her away – but I really wanted Sara.” I have no doubt Helen felt my joy at hearing that affirmation as I clapped my hands in response and assured her of my enthusiastic acceptance.

After petitioning God for direction and consulting with other believers, I have perfect peace about this new position. As Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no guidance the people fall, but in abundance of counselors there is victory.” How very true that is!

I always pray that God will guide my steps, open the doors that should be opened, and close those I shouldn’t walk through. Throughout this decision-making process, I believe my Heavenly Father not only opened doors but also blasted down any walls that stood in my way, saying, “Go, my child. I am with you.”

God will always guide us down the paths we should follow, just as He did with me during my all-day interview in the mountains near Marshall, NC.

I can’t even imagine what will lie ahead, but I’m excited to see where God takes me next. While I may have thought I was plotting my course a few times in life, I now know that by surrendering to my Creator, yet again, He is establishing my steps down a path I might never have taken on my own.

To be chosen is one thing. To be given the words, peace, and guidance I prayed for by God is quite another thing entirely. Above all, this I know: I am incredibly blessed.
Be Brave – Politics and religion must mix

Be Brave – Politics and religion must mix

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Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect. (1 Peter 3:15)

Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Those who say religion has nothing to do with politics do not know what religion is.” I couldn’t agree more. Taking it a step further, I believe our connection to God should impact every aspect of our lives – including formulating our worldview and determining how we vote.

For countless ages, most of us have lived by the adage that tells us, “Politics and religion don’t mix.” Both subjects are incontrovertibly controversial. And both can turn the best of friends into the bitterest of enemies. But does that mean that we should keep the two apart? Perish the thought. While I wouldn’t recommend sitting your climate-change-confirming cousin next to your Southern Baptist brother at the next family BBQ, it’s time for us as Christians to stop being afraid to speak about our values in the political arena. After all, if we remain mute, the opportunity to stand up for our faith may soon be lost forever.

When I started this blog in 2019, I was determined to focus on anything but politics. Restraining my conservative leanings seemed prudent in the establishment of this forum.  I’ve mostly stuck to that mindset over the years – but not anymore. I now believe that sharing my thoughts regarding political matters can help further my calling to encourage – in a whole new way. Don’t we all thrive in unity? Are we not stronger together? Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Through our combined strength, we can better stand for Christian values in a world ready to dismiss them. Discussing political matters with others – especially while espousing a Biblical perspective – helps us strengthen our values, protect our faith, and fortify our resolve to lead lives worthy of our calling.

My political expression is nothing new: it began long before my blog did. Apart from serving in several state and federal electoral campaigns, I became a community columnist for my local WV newspaper, The Martinsburg Journal, in 2009. What a thrill it was to see my words in print! Even more gratifying was the affirmation I received from readers, who were equally delighted by the evidence that our conservative values were alive and well in a world where the media would have us think otherwise.

A scrapbook clipping of one of my community columns under my former name.

While actively writing for the paper, another opportunity to stand up for my values presented itself. A few months into the Obama administration, a new grassroots organization appeared on the scene and spread like wildfire across our nation.

Like the patriots of 1773 who cast their tea into the Boston Harbor in protest of the British monarch’s excessive taxation on our new republic, a call to organize Tax Day protests caught my attention. When one of my readers suggested I become a Tea Party leader, I heeded the call and sprang into action. Before I could say, “No new taxes,” I was giving speeches in the town square, surrounded by fellow conservatives, holding hand-made signs voicing protest against our government’s recent actions.

My fellow Blue Ridge Patriots and I took our hand-made signs and flag to the nation’s capital in Sept. 2009. (Martinsburg Journal)

Not wanting to lose the momentum or unity, our group organized further – officially becoming the Blue Ridge Patriots. In addition to holding subsequent Tea Parties to raise awareness of our thoughts and values, we hosted a Patriot’s Picnic on July 4, stood vigil outside our local IRS office, and united with nearly 100,000 other Tea Partiers from across the country in our nation’s capital. On September 12, 2009, I joined my fellow Blue Ridge Patriots in carrying a 40-foot garrison flag to U.S. Capitol grounds. There was joy in our harmony and comfort in our camaraderie. I’ve never been prouder to be an American than I was that day.

Second from the right, I am pictured here with my fellow Blue Ridge Patriots as we held our 40-foot garrison flag above the Capitol lawn during our four-hour Tea Party event in Washington, DC.

Between the affirmation I received from my column and the shared thoughts we espoused in Tea Party events, one thing always struck me: the demonstration of bravery instills courage in others. It is easy to remain silent when we fear standing alone. Conversely, the masses find strength when even a few intrepid spokespeople stand up. Now is the time to raise our voices before government-controlled “hate speech” laws become the rule of the land. There is more at stake than values in our culture. The fundamental right to speak from our hearts, parent from our consciences, and worship how we choose are on the table in the upcoming election season and beyond.

We’re at a crossroads in our country. Right now, our nation is more divided than ever before. The media is no longer unbiased. Censorship is rampant. Radicalism is on the rise while Christian values are at an all-time low. But why are so many believers timid about verbalizing their beliefs? Is it not because the devil has made us afraid? Is not fear one of his greatest weapons? Rather than be bold believers like the early apostles, we’re hesitant to stand up, scared to offend, and afraid to look “different.” It’s time we overcame our fear and started using our voices to speak out. I, for one, am determined to do so.

Do we believe God’s Word anymore? If we do, we can’t be afraid to stand up for its truth. Silence is not just complacency; it’s enablement. We, as Christians, can no longer be mute in response to the evils taking over our culture, workplaces, schools – and, yes – even our churches.

Our Blue Ridge Patriots were joined by thousands of others from across the nation as we marched on Washington, DC in September 2009.

As Joshua directed the Israelites to take a stand for God as his nation was about to enter the long-awaited Promised Land, so we should also encourage one another to stand and move forward in the Battle for the Soul of our Nation – whether that be in the classroom, the boardroom, the public square, or in the White House.

“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15)

A clipping from the Martinsburg Journal details the flag our Tea Party group carried into Washington DC in Sept. 2009.

The time is now, beloved. Who are you standing for? What is important to you? As the Apostle Paul told us in Romans 8:31, “If God is for us, who can be against us?”

My faith informs every part of my life. Christianity isn’t just a religion. It’s a relationship that permeates every fiber of my being – including how I talk, what I value, and how I vote. I can’t separate it from my existence. As James 2:26 reminds us, “As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.” We are what we believe.

While no one can be sure who first said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing,” the sentiment remains the same. Christians can no longer remain silent while evil is running so rampant. As the Apostle Paul said in his letter to the Ephesians, “Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible – and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. This is why it is said: ‘Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.’ “Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.” (Chapter 5: 11-16)

This political cartoon from 2009 exemplifies the hatred that comes when you stand up for what you believe in. When what you’re doing is unpopular, it’s demonized. Perception is often far from reality. Be prepared and stay undaunted.

It’s time to be fearless – right here, right now, in this place, and in this time. Politics and religion must mix if we are to save our nation from the demonic forces taking over everything. We must be lionhearted if we care about our beliefs and “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks [us] to give the reason for the hope that [we] have.” (1 Peter 3:15)

We must never be fearful to stand up for our faith and values. As Joshua 1:9 reminds us, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

The Lord gives and the Lord takes away

The Lord gives and the Lord takes away

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“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” (Job 1:21)

On March 12, 2023, my God-ordained husband put a ring on my finger, and I became Mrs. David Robert Olson. On July 31, 2024, I reflexively rubbed my fingers across that same ring as I always did, only this time, something was wrong. This time, the precious gem that had sealed my engagement and marriage was gone.

My empty ring casing, as I discovered it on my hand.

The diamond in my engagement ring held great significance to me. Decades before David and I ever met, my sister, Jackie, gifted me with a diamond for no discernible purpose. The gem came to me in its original pendant setting out of the blue – without a chain or explanation. I wrote all about the ring in my blog entitled, God is in this story – Part 1, The Ring.  

My sister was living in Fort Myers, FL, at the time and was currently struggling through her second difficult marriage. I always suspected she wanted it to be stored somewhere safe, as she told me to “just save it.” And so, save it, I did, seldom giving it any thought as it sat in its used, orange felt jewelry box, tucked away inside a box of other keepsake items I still have.

Less than five years later, Jackie moved to Colorado to reestablish her life with a new husband. Tragically, Jackie’s time there was short-lived. A few years into their marriage, my sister and her 14-year-old daughter, Ashley, were killed by Jackie’s husband.

When God first led me to assist Samaritan’s Purse with disaster relief work after Hurricane Ian decimated parts of Florida in 2022, I had a choice of three different locations from which to labor – Englewood, Punta Gorda, or Fort Myers. I chose Fort Myers partly in honor of my sister, but also because I wanted to serve in the area hardest hit by that historic Category 4 hurricane. Above all, I wanted to be God’s hands and feet where I hoped I’d be most needed.

While these shrimp boats were left stranded on dry land in Ft. Myers, FL, after Hurricane Ian, David and I couldn’t help smiling at how God could bring beauty from ashes as he brought the two of us together through the storm.

Regardless of what brought me to Fort Myers, David’s and my mutual surrender to our Savior brought us together. Had either of us rejected God’s calling, we would have missed the biggest blessing of our lives – finding each other. That thought seldom leaves my mind. I enjoy recounting it at every telling of our story.

Psalm 37:4 has become my life verse: “Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” My life is a living testament to the veracity of that promise.

But I digress. As anyone who knows me will attest, I’ve never been someone who wears expensive jewelry. Having a real diamond on my finger – especially given how and why it got there – has always seemed incredulous to me, on many levels. Every time I looked at that ring, it shocked me anew. So many miraculous things have happened since I fully surrendered to God on that fateful journey in October 2022. I often find myself questioning how it all came together.

What led my sister to send me her diamond all those years ago? How did two broken people from different states, separated by hundreds of miles, healed by Christ, find themselves in a disaster zone together, become best friends, discover themselves as soulmates, and eventually marry – five short months later? How did that diamond stay in a keepsake box over two decades only to be expertly crafted into a ring that would seal the vows I said to my greatest love on our wedding day? How did my best friend from Bulgaria still have a hand-made wedding dress, inexplicably hand-delivered to her in the U.S. from her father, waiting in her garage to gift me to wear the day I got married? How did a hand-beaded garment created for someone in another country happen to be ready for me at the precise moment I needed it? How did that dress fit me so expertly over ten years after it was first created for another person I didn’t even know then? How on earth did anything between and surrounding David’s and my meeting ever happen?

Our wedding day, March 12, 2023

There is only one indisputable answer to all those questions: God. Our Creator preordained every part of my life to be precisely how it is today – including my meeting and marrying David. My Heavenly Father loves me. Everything I have, everything that comprises the life I now live, was given to me by God. One of my favorite Bible verses has always been James 1:17, which says, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” To that, I can only say, “Amen” and “Hallelujah!”

I know how blessed I have always been. I am nothing without Christ and would have nothing without God’s goodness and grace. I am forever grateful for all the blessings lovingly bestowed upon me by my Heavenly Father.

I also know that nothing touches my life without God allowing it to do so – good or bad. I accept that. Am I sad when things don’t turn out how I want them to? Of course. I am, after all, unquestionably human. I feel joy as deeply as I do pain, sorrow, and disappointment.

As such, I was initially devastated to discover that my precious diamond had been ripped out of its setting and seemingly lost to me forever. This once-forgotten gem meant a lot to me, after all. Still, I am blessed with an exceedingly greater treasure in God and David. When I tearfully shared the news of the loss to my husband, he melted my heart with his beautiful response: “You’ll never lose me, love.” I will forever hold the beauty of that statement close to my heart.

David and I celebrate the creation and receipt of our two wedding rings in January 2023.

And so, after searching for my wayward gem as much as possible, I let it go. While I may always wonder if it will turn up one day as my precious cross necklace did, I will not over-mourn its loss. After all, I still have a lovely wedding band on my finger, indelible memories in my heart, and a devoted husband by my side. With all that, I have more than I ever thought possible – all gifted to me by Heavenly Father.

Knowing that statement to be gospel truth, I can honestly say without reservation, “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” (Job 1:21).

No matter what, I will never stop praising my Savior.

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