What is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them? (Psalm 8:4)
As I walked through my living room this morning at the start of my day, I was struck by the luminous sunlight emanating through my arched window above the front door. After several days of rain and cloud cover, the contrasting glow cut through the darkness like a surgical blade. While I’m not a huge fan of daylight savings time, seeing these magnificent beams so early in the morning made me feel like a privileged witness to the dawn of creation.
Sunlight coming through my front arched window.
Rather than starting my workday from the kitchen table as usual, I felt compelled to sit in the living room, directly facing the radiant grandeur unfolding before my eyes. As my head tilted upward, I was consumed by God’s brilliant power and grace.
A few hours earlier, I woke up in bed and recounted my incredible blessings. I used to do so every morning, but lately, I find myself rushing into what always feels like a roller coaster ride on the tracks of responsibility and stamina.
Sunset over the Pacific Ocean, CA.
Not today. Today, I stopped to smell the roses – or at least bask in the sunlight. Today, I gave my full attention to the Creator of the Universe as He sliced away all my distractions with an incandescent display of His resplendence.
As I looked out into the glowing room, I was struck by how my Heavenly Father has filled my life with love, laughter, and light. I have everything my heart has ever desired – both tangibly and intangibly.
Sunset over the Spoleto Valley, near Assisi, Italy.
And yet, God said, there is more. In my humble world, God has given me Himself: His love, His power, His grace, and His presence. These gifts are new every morning. I am free to stand before the Creator of the universe and bask in His incomparable artistry- every day of my life. I have only to stop and allow myself the time to do so.
Sitting in my chair and considering my illuminating eyelashes, I was struck anew at how easy it is to focus on myself and forget about God. How arrogant. How petty am I to ever do so?
Sunrise, Tavernier, Florida Keys, FL
The Author of the universe lovingly created me. He made the air that fills my lungs and the blood that flows through my veins. He created the intricate system that comprises my body and told it to function so that I can breathe, eat, sleep, move, laugh, and cry – all while taking the miracle that is my existence for granted.
As I felt the warm sunlight on my face, I subconsciously knew I couldn’t look directly into the blinding orb from which it emerged. I have respect for the sun and understand its power. In acknowledging this simple truth, I was reminded anew of the awe and reverence that is consistently due to my Creator.
Sunset over the Rocky Mountains, CO
How often do I forget to revere the One who gave me life? How frequently do I elevate myself in importance while neglecting to consider that God is God and I am nothing in comparison?
This morning, I felt akin to the Psalmist as I considered the magnificence of my Creator. The words of Psalm 8 speak the musings of my own heart.
O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens. Out of the mouths of babies and infants, you have established strength because of your foes, to still the enemy and the avenger. When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field, the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas. O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!
As David and I re-examine the plight of the Israelites under Moses in our daily scripture readings, I must catch myself from thinking them fools for so quickly forgetting all that God did to bring them out of their slavery in Egypt. Their grumblings in the desert were surely no different than mine would have been if I were living through the same circumstances. Their fears over the walled cities and the enemies that waited to fight them in the Promised Land would likely have been mine as well. While I’d like to think I would be more like Joshua or Caleb and consistently remember that God can give me victory over any foe, I can’t be sure that insecurity won’t consume me when faced with such giants, myself.
When Caleb said, “We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it” (Numbers 13:3), would I have sided with this great hero of the faith, or might I have cowered with the others and doubted the power of my God? I can only hope that I will always stand fast in my faith.
Sunset, Humacao, Puerto Rico
The truth is, we all must take the time to “Be still and know that [God] is God.” (Psalm 46:10). We must sit down in the light, look up at the sunbeams, and consider who created everything that ever was and ever will be. Only when we can say, “Who am I that you should be mindful of me?” will we understand that we were created to worship God. Only by doing so will we ever fathom the greatness of our Creator.
We are loved by the Alpha and Omega – the beginning and the end. God created all that ever is and all that ever will be – and yet He loved us. Lowly, unpredictable, flawed, foolish, forgetful, despicable me is loved by the Creator of all things. Who am I to be loved by Him? I am nothing and yet everything because my Savior loves me.
By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. (John 13:35)
On Wednesday, March 12, 2025, David and I will celebrate our second wedding anniversary – a date made all the more special by the love that grows stronger with each passing day. I often marvel at the depth of love we hold for each other. When David smiles at me, I still get butterflies in my stomach. When I look at him, I can see how he melts with the force of the love in my gaze. Our love is a palpable substance that keeps us strong and bonded in a way I could have never imagined before our meeting.
Before David and I married, we coined several phrases that we still call our “David and Sara-isms.” I wrote about this subject in a blog post about a month after marriage. We shared a few of these unique phrases with our wedding day guests:
“Is this for real?” – Translation? This phrase is used constantly when David and Sara think about everything God has done to bring them together.
“DOUBLE awesome!” – Translation? When David first told Sara that she was awesome, she replied that he was awesome, too. David asked Sara, “If you’re awesome and I’m awesome, what are we together?” Sara replied, “We are DOUBLE awesome!” The phrase stuck! You can use it, too, to explain that something is beyond amazing. It’s “DOUBLE awesome!”
One David and Sara-ism we often use is “Together forever, wherever!” The saying remains as factual today as the day we first uttered it. David and I are inseparable. My original advice to our wedding-goers was, “Make sure you use this phrase carefully as it indicates a perpetual state of togetherness.”
A framed print of David and me in VA Beach, August 2023.
While some might think that living as such would grow old, I’m happy to say that it hasn’t – nor will it ever. We’ve always been together since I work from home and David is retired. We never get tired of that, nor do we need to separate ourselves to have “personal time”. While one of my friends strongly believes in the importance of the same, David and I have never desired separation. Sure, he goes to the store, and I work from my office for hours. I’m writing from the screen porch now, and David is in the living room. We’re not perpetually in the same room, nor do we feel the need to maintain constant communication.
Still, we remain “together forever, wherever.” The desire will never change – the hunger to be close, to know that the other person who completes you is never far away. We’ve both waited our entire lives to find each other. Why would we want to separate now?
David and me in Savannah, GA, 2023.
Another powerful David and Sara-ism is “I love that we love the way we love.” While there may be redundancies in that statement, the truth is that every part of the phrase is significant. David and I don’t just love one another; we feel that love through every fiber in our bodies. It comprises who we are. We demonstrate it with our touches, glances, and “huggles” on the couch and how we cook for each other, respect each other’s opinions, and care for one another – even through our recent joint bouts of sinus infections.
Still, the third strand of love that God wraps around us each day makes our love most remarkable. Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” The bond that David and I share started with God. He is wrapped around every part of our relationship. It’s demonstrated by how we pray together with our heads touching and arms around one another. We feel God’s love surround us during our thrice daily prayers, as we consistently start by thanking God for His love for us and each other.
Celebrating my birthday while on our honeymoon in Assisi, Italy, 2023.
David and I also grow stronger as we read our Heavenly Father’s Word together each evening. I am continually reminded as we do so that God’s love brought us to each other, and His love keeps our bond strong. We are rooted in Him, tied together by His strength and our mutual desire to serve, honor, and respect our Creator.
And so, I love that we love the way we love. As Christians, this is how all husbands and wives should love one another. It is also how we are to love our fellow believers and all those in the world. We are different because of our love for one another. We are survivors because of God’s strength. And we are conquerors over everything the devil throws at us through God’s power – not our own. (Romans 8:37)
Our wedding day – March 12, 2023.
Beloved, we can show God to the world daily – let us do so by showing everyone our love. Romans 5:8 tells us, “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” How could we demonstrate anything less as recipients of such a gift?
Let’s not let love remain inside us. Let’s show the world what it truly means to love until the whole world can shout – just as David and I do – “I love that you love the way you love.” After all, that’s how the world will know we are Christ’s disciples – by our love.
The LORD will keep you from all harm — He will watch over your life. (Psalm 121:7)
God and my husband have both saved me in countless ways. God saved my soul and has prepared a place for me to spend eternity with Him. Jesus has always been my closest friend and perpetual protector. His love constantly surrounds me. David is my earthly best friend. He is my soulmate, filling my days with love, laughter, and companionship. His love, too, constantly surrounds me, and I would be lost without him. This past week, a brief but epic event proved them to be my heroes as they saved me in a new and profound way.
I love cooking – baking, devising new recipes, and seeing the satisfaction of those who eat what I’ve created makes me happy. I recently developed a new recipe for air-frying pork chops that is both quick and savory.
After praying over our meal, I cut myself a piece of the succulent pork and enjoyed the flavor explosion in my mouth. My second bite was more significant than the first, and for whatever reason, I swallowed it quickly without masticating it enough.
As soon as I swallowed it, I knew that something was wrong. The lump in my throat wasn’t moving down as it should. I looked at David, knowing I needed to dislodge the pork, but I didn’t know how. Without saying a word to him, David also knew that our meal had dramatically changed.
“Are you okay?” he asked as I drooled and considered what to do next. “Do you need help?”
Jumping up from the table, I moved to the kitchen sink and immediately placed my head down, trying to cough but unable to do so.
David came up behind me, beseeching, “God be with us. Jesus, help us! Love, are you okay? Do I need to call 9-1-1? Can you breathe?”
Glancing to my left, I tried to speak and quickly realized how serious the situation was compared to what I had first thought. “Not really,” was all I could rasp out.
Placing my head down over the sink again, I motioned for David to pat my back, thinking that might help. I tried to cough but realized that I couldn’t. During that heartbeat, I knew that I couldn’t get any air and that the situation had become perilous.
At this point, David started yelling, “Jesus, help us! Don’t do this to me, love. Breathe, baby, breathe.”
In what seemed like a millisecond, David had his arms around me from behind and began thrusting upward in a modified Heimlich maneuver. “Are you okay?” David kept saying. “God help us! Don’t do this to me! Breathe!”
As he said this, I looked down and saw the partially chewed pork chop in the sink. Without my realizing it, David’s thrust had dispelled the piece of food from my throat.
As tears rolled down my face, I wheezed, “I’m okay. I’m okay! It’s out! I’m okay!”
David and I immediately embraced as ten thousand thoughts cycled through my head. What if David hadn’t been here? What if that hadn’t worked? How would anyone have known what had happened to me?
“Oh, my gosh, love,” David said. “I’ve never been so scared in my life! Don’t ever do that to me again!”
As we sat back down at the kitchen table, I realized how quickly our whole world could have changed and how grateful I was to breathe normally again.
“I can’t believe how quickly that happened,” I told David after taking a long drink and touching my husband’s precious face. “Thank you, Jesus! Thank you, David!Thank you, Jesus!”
With tears in his eyes, David reiterated how frightened he had been at the prospect of losing me in such an unexpected event. “You really scared me,” David repeated over and over throughout the rest of the evening. “I’m so glad I was here. Don’t ever do that to me again! I can’t even think about losing you like that.”
As we hugged and snuggled close to one another the rest of the evening, I told David how the thought of something happening to me while I was alone had occasionally crossed my mind over the years. “Who would ever know?” I asked. “It might have been days before anyone even knew anything was wrong. I was all alone.”
“You’re not alone anymore, love,” David responded. “Never again. I’m so glad I was here.”
“Me, too,” I replied while showering my husband with kisses. “Thank you for saving me, David. Thank you, Jesus!”
David and I share smiles and love while visiting Savannah, GA in February.
This whole incident has reminded me anew of how fragile life is. In a moment, in the expanse of a heartbeat, our lives, our existence, can inexorably change. One moment, we’re here – eating, working, laughing, planning for the future – yet we could be gone from this world and living our eternal lives in a fraction of a second.
Please make no mistake: life continues after we stop breathing. Forever and ever, we will either be spending eternity in heaven or hell. There is no purgatory, soul sleep, reincarnation, or any of the other convoluted concepts that atheists and alternate religions have tried to envision. There is zero evidence of the same.
Scripture is filled with references about eternity:
“Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears My word and believes Him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment but has passed from death to life.” (John 5:24)
“And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear Him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” (Matthew 10:28)
“And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.” (Matthew 25:46)
“Then I saw a great white throne and Him who was seated on it. From his presence earth and sky fled away, and no place was found for them. And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Then another book was opened, which is the book of life. And the dead were judged by what was written in the books, according to what they had done. And the sea gave up the dead who were in it, Death and Hades gave up the dead who were in them, and they were judged, each one of them, according to what they had done. Then Death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. This is the second death, the lake of fire. And if anyone’s name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire.” (Revelation 20: 11-15)
And so, I am grateful to my heavenly Father, who saved my soul from eternal punishment and promised me a home with Him in glory. As John 14: 1-3 reminds us, “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in Me. In My Father’s house, there are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to Myself, that where I am you may be also.”
I have a home in glory, yes, but I also have a beautiful home and life with my earthly soulmate – my dearest David. I am so grateful to God for allowing me to stay here with my husband longer. We have so much more to do for Christ’s kingdom. Our work here has barely begun.
My heroes saved me yet again. Every day is a gift, and I intend to continue to worship my Savior and use my life for His purpose.
Be sure to do the same, beloved. You never know when your next breath will be your last.
Use me, Lord Jesus. My life is yours. You gave it to me, and I give it back to You for Your glory. Forever and ever, Amen.
Your Word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path. (Psalm 119:105)
The divided bottom of my church tote.
I recently found an old tote bag that I formerly carried to church with me. What I call a tote is really an organizer purse – designed with a divided section at the bottom to keep everything organized. A large section can hold a cell phone, and smaller sections easily store a medium-sized wallet, makeup, or whatever else one might like to store in a purse. I loved the concept but not the large size – hence, it ultimately became my church tote. I kept my phone, antibacterial gel (a must in a church where routine greetings are exchanged during the service), tissues, Bible, and journal for taking sermon notes. While I was excited to find the tote again, revisiting my old Bible was like stepping backward in time.
I’ve owned a lot of Bibles over the years. I have an American Patriot Bible with sections devoted to detailed descriptions of our Founders’ faith and what drove them to create fundamental documents like the Declaration of Independence. I also have several Daily Bibles – one that lists the scriptures chronologically and another with scriptural insights and life principles written by pastor and theologian Dr. Charles Stanley. Over the past three years, I’ve used a Kindle version of my One Year Bible that easily travels with me wherever I go.
All three daily Bibles allow me to read passages from the Old Testament, Psalms, and Proverbs, along with sections from the New Testament. David and I finished reading the Bible together as a couple last year and are doing so again. Daily scriptural reading helps strengthen our marital bond while growing our understanding of God’s love and design for our lives.
A page inside David’s family Bible.
David, too, has several Bibles. One is an old family relic from 1880 with over 500 historical etchings. Another is a large-print version given to him by a former subcontractor. The third and most meaningful is the Samaritan’s Purse Bible he received while we were serving with the charity in Ft. Myers, FL, after Hurricane Ian. I was the first to sign David’s Bible before we intended to go our separate ways. God had other plans, which allowed us to become best friends quickly, fiancés within two months, and ultimately married five months later. That timeline still astounds me.
No matter what Bible I read, God’s Word has always been integral to my life. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t relish reading scripture. I’ve always felt my Heavenly Father speaking to me through His Word. As often as I read it, I still feel the scripture coming alive, glowing with love, wisdom, and guidance. God’s words are precious to me and have guided my footsteps throughout my life. They gave me hope when everything else seemed lost and reminded me that my Creator loves me.
David’s Samaritan’s Purse Bible features the first message I ever wrote to him after we served together in Ft. Myers, FLin October, 2022.
When I pulled out my old Bible from my church tote, the first thing that struck me was the embossed name on the front cover: my birth name. I’ve not used that name in several decades. Since high school, my name has changed four times: twice in bad marriages, once when God gave me my new name – Sara Victoria Christiansen – and a fourth time when I married my soul mate. Instead of being the victorious Christian daughter of the King, I am now the victorious daughter of the King who married my own King David. My name alone tells my testimony. Looking back, I can only wonder at God’s diverse plan for my life and all He has brought me through.
When my older sister gifted me with my first Bible, I could never have imagined the life I am living right now.
And yet, God knew what was in store for me. In a very real way, the favorite scriptures I wrote on the front cover of this great book describe my life:
“The joy of the Lord is my strength.” (Nehemiah 8:10)
“Better is one day in Your courts than a thousand elsewhere. I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked.” (Psalm 84:10)
“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles.” (Isaiah 40:31)
“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” (Psalm 91:1)
The back of my former Bible features notes and scripture.
I have hand-written scripture references, and several pages of sermon notes in the back of my old Bible. Also tucked away beside the notes is a yellow sheet of paper with the scripture passage I read at my sister’s funeral: Romans 2: 35-39. “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: ‘For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’ No, in all these things, we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
God’s Word is timeless and eternal. Hebrews 4:12 says, “For the Word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
2 Timothy 3:16-17 also assures us, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
From God’s mouth to Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection, my Heavenly Father’s love is forever imprinted in the universe and my soul. “I have hidden Your Word in my heart that I might not sin against You.” (Psalm 119:11)
No matter my name, my life stage, or where I live, God’s Word has continually strengthened, guided, and encouraged me. “The joy of the Lord has always been my strength.” I am who I am because of my Heavenly Father’s love. I know that for a fact. After all, the Bible tells me so.
Casa dell Amore – A place to live beyond Valentine’s Day
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. (John 13:34)
A few days before Valentine’s Day, I awoke inspired to shower my visiting 88-years-young mother with love and attention on this memorable holiday. I rarely get to share this celebrated occasion with my mom as she and my brother, Joe, primarily live in Colorado. While they’re visiting Georgia this month, I was excited to make this day something uniquely memorable.
“I want mom to feel really special,” I explained to my husband, David. “I’m going to fix her hair and makeup, help her get dressed up, and then cook a fancy meal for her. I want to set everything up as if she’s in a restaurant, but I’ll need your help.”
As a young adult, David spent a few years as a waiter in the now-defunct restaurant Bennigans and a few other VA Beach hot spots. He’d told me stories of his experiences, so I knew I needed his assistance to bring my vision to life.
“I want you to dress up like a waiter,” I told him. “I’ll have music playing in the background when Mom and Joe come over. You can seat them at the table, and we’ll serve the food, one course at a time. It’ll be great!”
David eagerly agreed.
Over the next few days, I planned the menu, crafted the dinner invitation, and carefully considered the prep work required to orchestrate my plans. Everything was in place to make this a night to remember – until it wasn’t.
Hours before the evening preparations began, my plans slowly crumbled around me. Try as I might, I had never made it out to shop for the makeup I wanted for my mom’s makeover. I average 10-hour work days, which doesn’t allow much time to go shopping – and I wouldn’t dream of asking David to pick out and purchase makeup for my mom.
That’s okay, I thought. She can use mine.
Then, there was the lack of preparation time on Valentine’s Day. Rather than easing into my orchestrations with an abridged workday, one thing after an other kept me working longer than expected. When I finally shut down my computer, I had only an hour and a half to facilitate everything.
At 5:00 pm, I began rushing around, grabbing my makeup and fingernail polish – another add-on I thought would be fun for Mom – and then ran next door to my mom’s house. What I had hoped would be fun became stressful at that point.
Upon entering, I found her lying half asleep on her bed. “She didn’t sleep well last night,” my brother explained. “She’s resting now.”
To assist my mom with her night out, I hoped to surprise her by acting out the part of “Shelly, the stylist.” It would be Shelly who would help Mom prepare for her big night out. After finding my mom in her current state, I seriously questioned my judgment in thinking I could do anything like this without informing her in advance of the same.
When Mom called me back to her bedroom to ask what I had in my hands, I explained to her that the curling iron and clothes were for me to assist her in preparing for dinner. “Oh, no,” my mom said, looking shocked and bewildered. “I can’t handle that.”
“That’s okay,” I said, quickly losing the Southern drawl I had planned to utilize in her makeover session. “You just rest. We can do this tomorrow.”
After returning home, David asked me what brought me back so quickly.
“Well,” I began. “Mom is exhausted after not getting enough sleep last night. I told her we’ll try again tomorrow. We’ll see. I hope all of this works out.” I spent the rest of the evening preparing food for the next day so I wouldn’t be caught rushing again.
When the following evening came around, I changed my clothes, adopted my Southern drawl, and moved next door – hoping Take Two of the script would work better than the first round did the day before.
As I approached Mom’s house, I found her slowly walking around the yard. When she saw me, I immediately adopted my drawl, extended my arm, and escorted her back into the house. Much to my delight, my mom laughed and went along with every silly thing I did for her.
As I moved her to her back porch, I asked her which color she wanted for her nails – “Pale pink or hot pink,” I drawled. “In the south, it’s gotta be pink.”
Choosing hot pink, I began painting my mom’s fingernails, something I’d never done before. Seeing how much she loved the experience made me vow to repeat the activity more regularly.
After gushing my way through how “be-a-you-ti-ful” her fingernails looked, I advised her that she would be “beating them off with a stick” over dinner. Thankfully, my mom kept laughing at my silly antics and fake Southern drawl.
After applying lotion to her face, I regretfully explained that I only had a “lighter than suntan” foundation for her skin since my skin tone is much paler than my mother’s.
Much to my surprise, my mom announced that she had purchased some makeup for herself from the “Here and There” store, which I took to be her remembered name of her favorite thrift shop: “Hello Good-buy.” Rushing into her “twa-let” to retrieve the cosmetic, I found the same expensive foundation I had planned to buy her but never had the time to do so. She had purchased it for the special price of one whole dollar, as evidenced by the bright orange sticker on the side.
“What a shopper you are!” I gushed as I smoothed the foundation over her skin. “A good Southerner knows how to bargain shop, and you are indeed the queen of thrifting!”
Her choice of lipstick also delighted me as she chose my own signature red over maroon to tint her lips. As my brother looked on, trying not to laugh, I asked my mom to purse her lips, to which she closed her lips entirely. “Unless you want to look like Tammy Faye Baker, you’d best show me a pouty face so I can see your purty lips and apply this here lipstick.”
A few minutes later, I outlined my mom’s lips and gently applied the bright color, asking her to go, “Mwah mwah to spread the color around.” She did so, nearly causing me to laugh aloud at her complete cooperation and our absolute fun in the preparation.
After giving Mom a new “bedazzled sweater” to wear to dinner, I returned home to change into my dinner ensemble and begin finalizing the meal. David, too, switched into his white-shirted waiter gear with a kitchen towel over his arm to complete the preparations.
When the appetizers – homemade cheese and bacon potato skins – were ready, I called my brother and made buzzing sounds, advising him that his “table was up” so he could “proceed to the restaurant.”
David greeted them at the door, inviting Mom and Joe into the Casa dell Amore – the name I gave our restaurant. I videotaped their entrance and was delighted as my mom said, “Muchas gracias,” – playing along with our created scenario. In response, I donned a new fake Italian accent, telling them, “Welcome! Welcome!” as they sat down at the table for dinner being held in Mom’s honor.
The rest of the evening went off without a hitch as we all savored the stuffed salmon, asparagus, and sweet potato main course – followed by a strawberries and whipped cream parfait for mom and cherry cheesecake for the rest of us. While Andrea Bocelli serenaded our meal, David played the piano between courses, and we all laughed, relishing our time together.
Amid the “to go” boxes I gave my mom and Joe for their leftovers, they told me what a great evening they had. David and I confirmed the same, saying we enjoyed it as much as they did.
On the way to church together the next day, Mom said the night was “the most fun she’d had in a long time,” which made my heart sing.
Looking back, I know I could have called the whole thing off when my original plans failed – but that thought never entered my mind. I know how important it is to show love. Rather than give up, I took it all in stride and tried again the next day. And look at the memories we made as a result!
The entire event reminds me of how easy it is to let simple opportunities to show love disappear. We’re too busy. We might be rejected. It’s too much effort or risk. Yes, things don’t always work out, and there is always the prospect of failure, frustration, and disappointment.
But what potential joy do we relinquish by failing to extend love at every opportunity? Even if we are turned down, stepped on, and pushed away nine times out of ten, isn’t the tenth worth it? Didn’t Jesus Himself feel disappointment and rejection? Didn’t he suffer and die on the cross, bleeding to save our undeserving, unrepentant souls to show us what love is all about?
John 3:16 embodies the gospel message of God’s all-encompassing love by reminding us that our Creator sacrificed His Son so we can live forever by simply believing in Christ.
In a similar way, 1 John 3:16 reminds us to live out this theology by loving others just as He demonstrated to us: “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”
Take a chance, beloved. Let love fill your house. Let it overflow into your life and onto others at every opportunity. Love is a place where we all should live – long beyond Valentine’s Day. It should be celebrated, practiced, and lived in – every day of the year.
When Jesus spoke again to the people, He said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows Me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12)
In November 2024, I spent two weeks working in Marshall, NC, while serving in my former role. While those two weeks were incredibly stressful, there were moments that stood out as they reminded me that I was there for God’s purpose – to show the Light of Christ to the world.
One particular exchange during the second week of that interval will always remain with me. As usual, I had made a lunch run, venturing out from the remote location where my workplace was building a retreat center in the beautiful North Carolina mountains. Just after lunch, one of the senior executives from the London office turned back to where I was sitting to thank me for getting everyone’s food. As I smiled and gave her my typical “My pleasure” response, she stopped mid-stride and returned to me.
“You have the most beautiful smile, Sara,” she began. “I truly mean that. It’s not just your smile. It’s more that when you smile, your whole existence lights up.”
“Thank you,” I replied, smiling again. “It’s not me. It’s what’s inside me that you see.”
Amid all the darkness of the company I worked for, their New Age talk and practices consuming me then, that brief encounter made me happy – particularly because my boss at the time heard the entire exchange. While she didn’t comment, I saw her look at me before turning away after hearing my response.
That’s why I’m here, I remember thinking at the time. I’m here to show God’s Light to you. While I later regretted not clarifying by saying, “It’s who is inside me that you see,” I knew I would be more specific if given another opportunity to do so.
Much to my delight, the opportunity to speak about this topic again came sooner than I could ever have anticipated.
Having tendered my two-week notice of resignation a month later, my boss precisely detailed who she felt I should notify about my departure. Thankfully, the British executive I’d met in NC was someone she wanted me to reach out to.
“She really liked you,” my boss explained. “Make sure you let her know you’re leaving.”
Seizing this opportunity to refine the comments I’d made the previous month better, I did so in my notification.
“I must begin by thanking you for your kindness during your visit to Marshall in November,” I began. “While I tendered my letter of resignation earlier this week, I will take fond memories of all those gracious to me when I leave – you being chief among them.
“I will never forget how you told me my smile lit up my entire existence and that there is a glow about me,” I continued. “At the time, I said that it’s what’s inside me that you see. I should have clarified that it is really who is inside me that shines forth. That Light is my Savior, Jesus Christ. As I mentioned to [my boss], there is a difference between being a Christian and having a relationship with Jesus Christ. I have the latter. While I hoped this relationship could exist alongside my work here, I now know it cannot – hence my departure. I already exist in a place of peace, wisdom, and love, which allows me to walk away and accept God’s guidance for my next steps.
“All that being said, I greatly admire you and all those choosing to show love to the world with your whole being. I am doing the same – just in a different manner through a different source. I hope and pray that you can understand and feel the same one day. In the meantime, you remain in my heart and prayers. Never forget how precious you are. Most appreciatively, Sara.”
While I had no idea how this correspondence would be received, the response was astounding.
“Dear Sara,” came the reply. “Thank you for your light, your thoughtfulness, your service, and most of all, your love and care.
“On a personal note, I’m so deeply grateful for meeting you and bearing witness to your heartfulness which shines through in all that you are and do. You have such a gentle way and penetrating intelligence, and we are blessed that your bright and loving presence has helped us since your arrival. Wishing you all the love and joy in your next adventure.”
To say that I was stunned by this response is an understatement. I was overjoyed to learn that not only were my words received with the love I wrapped around them but that God’s Light had indeed shown through my everyday actions. That’s what I had hoped for, as that’s how I try to live my life every day.
One profound truth will always remain with me from that job: a vast amount of people live in darkness – many more than I ever realized. Anyone who lives without Christ is living in the dark.
They may appear happy, kind, and full of love – but their love differs from God’s. Their love is conditional and requires steady feeding to remain satiated.
Our Heavenly Father’s love is wholly unconditional and everlasting. Nothing can compare to being loved by the Creator of the universe. Anything else will always come short – yet countless people pursue temporary happiness and worldly pleasure. They seek it in people, drugs, money, and wisdom. They seek it in power, prestige, and even in a “higher consciousness” – as was the case in my former company.
We can’t find peace, wisdom, and love by morphing our minds into another realm. Such an ideal is nothing short of demonic. Only our Heavenly Father can break through the darkness and show us the real Light of the world. Only God can satisfy.
The sad truth is that too often, people don’t even realize they’re living in the dark because they’ve never experienced the true Light of Christ. As Charles Martin explains in his fictional work, The Record Keeper, “People in darkness don’t know they’re in darkness because it’s all they’ve ever known. It’s their world. They navigate primarily by bumping off things that are stronger. Immovable. They don’t know darkness is darkness until someone turns on a light. Only then does the darkness roll back like a scroll. It has to. Darkness can’t stand Light. And it hasn’t. Not since God spoke it into existence.”
Years ago, I remember hearing a sermon describing the importance of our witness: “You may be the only church anyone ever experiences. Make it count.” I might now add that you may be the only reflection of Jesus’s Light someone may ever see. May we never lose an opportunity to shine God’s luminescence into the shadows.
Jesus Christ is the Light of the world. As followers of Christ, so also are we. I am His hands and feet, just as I am privileged to be His Light. As Christ said, “You are the Light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand, and it gives Light to everyone in the house.” (Matthew 5:14-15)
Sunrise over the Atlantic Ocean, Tavernier, FL (FL Keys)
And so, I intend to keep shining. I earnestly pray that Christ’s Light will always be reflected off of me – every day, everywhere I go, and in everything I do. After all, “It’s not me you see, but Christ – the Light of the world – inside of me.”
Mr. Bojangles – Our furry treasure with a tripod leg and a golden heart
“But ask the animals, and they will teach you, or the birds in the sky, and they will tell you; or speak to the earth, and it will teach you, or let the fish in the sea inform you. Which of all these does not know that the hand of the Lord has done this? In his hand is the life of every creature and the breath of all mankind.” (Job 12:7-10)
One of David’s and my favorite stories of our initial deep connection begins with a text message I sent to David. I had agreed for him to stop by my house before he returned to VA Beach – just a few days after we met. “I hope you’re not allergic to cats,” I began, “as I have three. I promise I’m not a crazy cat lady. They all found me, and I couldn’t say ‘no.'”
David’s first text to me with Bo on his lap as he returned from Ft. Myers, FL.
That’s when David sent me the now infamous photo of our precious Bo-man sitting on his lap while he drove his car to my home in GA. Really, God? I remember thinking. He’s a cat-man, too?
I soon learned that David is much more than a cat-man. He has the tender heart of an animal parent.
And Bo was much more than a cat. He had a tripod leg and a golden heart that outshone his beautiful coat. When Bo looked you in the eyes, you swore he was seeing into your soul. While we reluctantly surrendered our fur-baby back to God in November 2024, he will live forever live in our hearts.
Bo’s full moniker was Mr. Bojangles – a name given due to Bo’s initial penchant for wandering. David adopted Bo and two other cats after one of his friends passed away, leaving the sweet kitties as orphans. Bo’s name at the time was “Orange,” which David felt lacked the character this noble beast deserved. Along with Bo came Monroe and an older female cat who didn’t live long after her former owner died. Monroe was the alpha and dominated Bo. Monroe lived with David for close to seven years until he eventually died in his sleep.
Bo was initially reluctant to trust David – preferring to stay under David’s house most of the time. He only ventured out for meals and nighttime discovery missions.
David kept his window open at night, hoping Bo might eventually venture inside. One night, he did just that.
As any cat person knows, kitties perceptively know how to wake us by gently brushing their whiskers over our faces. That’s precisely what Bo did one evening – surprising David with a gentle whisker kiss in the middle of the night. It’s as if he said, “I trust you now, and I’ll let you keep me.” There was no going back from that moment of surrender.
David continued to let Mr. Bojangles out during the day, thinking that’s what his kitty wanted. In the process of moving to his new place, David’s roommate thought he’d be helpful by bringing Bo over with him while transporting his personal belongings to the new property. Without thinking, he simply placed Bo in the car without utilizing a cat carrier for the journey. Upon arrival, he opened the car door to get out and before he knew what was happening, Bo bolted from the vehicle and disappeared into the night.
For six weeks, David despaired over ever seeing his best friend again. He scoured the streets every day, putting fliers and food out, even leaving blankets and clothing in the garage with the door slightly open, hoping to lure Bo back home again – all to no avail. David even visited the local animal shelter weekly, praying that someone had turned Bo in. They didn’t.
One fateful evening, David’s roommate came rushing in, yelling that Bo was in the garage. David immediately rushed out to find his fur baby crying with excitement at being back with his daddy. Blessedly, the long lost prodigal had eventually found his way home – a little skinnier but grateful to be back where he belonged.
From that day forward, Bo never went outside again.
Over the next 3-plus years, Bo accompanied David on countless car rides. Never content to sit in a carrier or ride shotgun, Bo considered himself the navigator, sitting on David’s lap throughout the journey – only venturing off for an occasional drink, snack, or use of his accompanying litter box. After doing so, Bo immediately resumed his spot, fully understanding that David couldn’t drive anywhere without his guidance. Bo took his navigator job seriously, as did David.
This oft-repeated practice led Bo to be on David’s lap that sunny October day as he drove to visit me for the first time. David had left his kitty at his younger brother’s house in FL while he served with Samaritan’s Purse. The two were almost to the Florida-Georgia line when my text came in. David said he laughed out loud when he saw my message. He remembers telling Bo, “Wait until she sees this,” as he sent me the photo of them together.
As if receiving a text message with a cat on his lap wasn’t enough to stun me, David shocked me further when he showed up at my front door with Bo nestled in his arms. I’ll never forget Bo’s big eyes staring back at me when I opened the door that day. To say that Bo was unique barely scratches the surface of the larger-than-life persona captured inside his tiny fur body.
Bo lived with David during his time renovating Herm and Nancy’s home in Ft. Myer’s, FL, following Hurricane Ian’s decimation of their property. Despite the loud noises of David’s air compressor and high-pressure nail gun, Bo slept on David’s air mattress in a construction zone for nearly 4 months as if it was nothing.
I witnessed this un-cat-like behavior for the month I lived in this space while helping with the rebuild – and it never ceased to amaze me. We only let Bo venture out of his temporary bedroom in the evenings – after Herm and Nancy had settled down with their Shih Tzu, Gigi, in their room. Bo would walk around, smell everything we’d worked on during the day, and calmly return to the bedroom for the night. Knowing we’d passed his inspection each evening meant a lot to us. In every way imaginable, Bo was one cool cat.
As quiet as a dormouse, Bo never cried or uttered a sound until he came to live with me during the final phases of David’s renovation. David had proposed to me a month and a half before, and we knew Bo would eventually need to learn to get along with my two kitties, so I began socializing him while David finished his FL work. I had lost my dear Rocky a few months prior and was happy to have sweet Bo with me.
It was during this interval that Bo discovered his voice. He soon learned that by yowling in the morning, he would get fed whenever he wanted to. To prevent being woken up at night by Bo’s new yacking, I’d keep him in my bedroom with extra kibble. There was no question who was in charge at that point. It was always Bo.
While I was concerned that this older, furry gentleman would be overwhelmed by my younger, bigger, and more excitable fur baby, Leo, it didn’t take long for Bo – a formerly mild-mannered cat who had been picked on by his former roommate, Monroe – to express his hierarchy. A few swift whacks to Leo’s giant Maine Coon head taught Leo to respect his elders and give Bo deference whenever he walked into the room.
Bo also had a way of luring Leo in for a sneak attack. Occasionally, he would unexpectedly walk over to groom Leo’s head, giving him a false sense of security and causing David and I to gush over the peaceful scene before us.
It was only when Leo, David, and I least expected it that Bo would whack Leo in the head, causing peals of laughter to spring forth from David and me. Leo would always shake off the whack in disbelief, learning another lesson of respect from his dominant older brother.
Bo was like that – full of unexpected acts of hilarity and intelligence. He used to walk laps around the kitchen table while David and I would eat. We knew he wanted more kibble, so we encouraged him to walk “just one more lap” while we ate before we rewarded him with extra food. He’d often sit after the first few laps, giving David and me his big “kibble eyes.”
“One more lap,” I’d encourage. “You can do it, Bo!” He always did.
Bo also proved that you’re never too old to learn new tricks. With just a bit of encouragement, David and I taught Bo to stand on his back legs and stretch “up” into our outstretched hands for head scratches and treats – or even to balance a small toy on his head – no small task for a cat with a tripod leg.
I remember the first time David sent me a picture of Bo with his left leg stretched out as he sat. “Have you ever seen a cat sit like this?” David asked. While I hadn’t, I was puzzled over what would cause him to do so. During Bo’s time living with me before David and I got married, I realized Bo couldn’t bend his back leg and tuck it to sit as most animals do. I suspected that it had been broken at some point in his mysterious past.
Despite my theory, our vet told us that Bo had a “moveable kneecap,” which prevented him from bending and sitting normally. Instead, Bo would frequently squat on his haunches – always looking as if he was waiting for us to place a tiny chair beneath him. I took dozens of pictures of him with his outstretched tripod leg, as we called it. Such scenes always made me smile.
It was during that same vet visit that we learned that Bo had kidney disease. That explained his compulsion to drink water to excess. Although we placed him on a special diet, Bo never liked his dietary food. We eventually gave in and fed him what he wanted, supplemented with extra water and mashed pumpkin for a boost of nutrition and moisture. Water was always crucial to Bo’s good health. We’d often find him with his head stuck in the toilet, drinking the cool water – despite the numerous water bowls and cat fountain we’d gotten him. He gained weight, thriving for another year and a half before his medical condition caused a slow deterioration.
David frequently “boxed” with Bo, gently patting his kitty’s face until Bo would swat at David – completely without menace. Even when he’d get irritated with David and mouth him to prove he was the superior fighter, he’d always do so without absolute gentleness.
Back in August, I kept Bo with me while David returned to VA Beach to work on his house renovation. Bo’s appetite had decreased, and I gave him three meds daily. I couldn’t get up the nerve to stick him with a needle to give him the lactated ringers the vet had said we could give him at home. The extra fluids were intended to keep Bo from getting dehydrated and help flush the toxins out that his kidneys weren’t. Despite the meds, Bo was losing weight and getting weaker every day.
A week after David left, I drove Bo and my other kitties up to VA Beach to what I thought would be Bo’s last days. Instead, Bo thrived on the car ride, as he always had. Upon arrival, David and I immediately gave Bo his subcutaneous fluids. He miraculously recovered – eating well, gaining weight, and even lapping David and me again as we ate.
I’ll never forget the joy in David’s voice when he boxed with Bo again one evening. It was what we were praying for – just a little bit longer with Bo – boxing, lapping, and yowling for kibble in the early morning. God gave it all to us, and we were so grateful. We thanked God daily for our extra time with Bo – knowing he would tell us when he was ready to go.
He eventually did.
When Bo stopped eating – despite the appetite stimulant I placed on his ears every day and all the different types of food I tried to entice him with – we knew it was time. In abject sadness, David made an appointment with a former vet in VA Beach for the following day.
We learned we had gone to the wrong vet’s office when we were in the exam room. Even though we were in the wrong place, the staff gave us exactly what we needed on this day, even surprising us with a clay print that will forever serve as a reminder of the paws that walked all over our hearts.
I swore my heart was ripping open as we said goodbye to our sweet Bo-man that day, but we gave him to God, telling him that he was in good hands as we let him go from our earthly lives. David made him a casket, and we swaddled him inside it for the journey home to GA. His earthly shell may rest in our garden, but we believe he is now running around in heaven – completely healed of his trick tripod leg. We know we’ll see him again there one day.
Isaiah 11:6-9 tells us that, “The wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling[a] together; and a little child will lead them. The cow will feed with the bear, their young will lie down together, and the lion will eat straw like the ox. The infant will play near the cobra’s den, and the young child will put its hand into the viper’s nest. They will neither harm nor destroy on all my holy mountain, for the Earth will be filled with the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea.” Such beautiful assurances speak to animals being in heaven. I feel confident we’ll see all those we shared time with on Earth when we’re there.
God may only bless our lives with our fur babies for a short time, but that doesn’t mean the lessons they teach us are any less significant by their duration. Bo taught us to love deeply and to laugh every day. He personified faith and trust, no matter how many times we stuck him with needles or asked him to hold on.
Our Heavenly Father does the same with us. We might not like the pricks or appreciate the patience God is cultivating in us – but we know it’s all for our own good. Like Bo, we are blessed with every good day we have on this Earth. Thank God for a Savior who loves us.
And thank God for the blessing of love and furry companions that bring sunshine and light into our earthly existence. What a Savior we serve! We are so grateful for His incredible compassion and the promise of a brighter tomorrow.
“The Lord reached down from on high and took hold of me; He drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support. He brought me out into a spacious place; He rescued me because He delighted in me.” (Psalm 18:16-19)
In my last post,Journey Out of Nineveh, I detailed my decision to quit my job and trust God with whatever came next. One day after making that decision, David received an offer on the house we’d spent nearly two years renovating. While we eventually turned down the initial offer, we accepted another full-priced bid one week after putting a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard. God provided me with a safety net after I followed His direction to end my employment with an organization that I knew was facilitating anti-Godly practices. His provision astounded me and surpassed my expectations. What came next proved even more incredible than David’s house sale.
After spending two weeks in Marshall, NC, to support my former role in person, I knew something had to give. Halfway through the 96 hours I put in during my first week on site, I checked my inbox before collapsing into bed that evening. In my mail was a LinkedIn message advising me of jobs the app presumed I might be interested in. I knew I didn’t have an active job search running, yet a mailing with prospective positions was waiting for me in my mailbox, just the same.
When I opened the message, I was shocked that one of the first recommended roles was for an executive assistant position at the company I’d just left less than two months before. Could this ad be for my old job? Where did this mailing come from?
I shared the news with David the following day as he prepared to drive to Marshall so we could serve with Samaritan’s Purse in Asheville the next day. The upcoming activity helped me get through the week. Knowing that David would be with me soon kept me energized. I was equally overjoyed at the prospect of showing God’s love to hurting North Carolinians whose homes had been damaged by Hurricane Helene.
“I’m thinking of reaching out to my old boss to ask him about this job listing,” I told David.
“Go for it, love!” David replied. “You need to get out of there.”
And so, I did.
After a night of waiting for a response from my former boss, I wrote to him again the following day as David and I drove to the Billy Graham Headquarters to begin our day’s activities. This time, I wasn’t so subtle. My text advised my previous manager – a friend and fellow believer – that I wanted to return to the company. I also inquired about the open position I’d seen online. I knew the time for subtlety was over. He immediately responded.
David and I felt privileged to visit The Cove at the Billy Graham Training Center in Asheville, NC, before our days serving with Samaritan’s Purse.
Unfortunately, he said the position was not to support him, so he advised me to apply through standard channels. While I attempted to do so that evening, the posting had already been taken down online.
After sending out a few more inquiries with former colleagues, I learned the open role would support a higher executive than I did previously. Compelled to continue, I created a cover letter, updated my resume, and sent everything directly to the executive seeking a new assistant. In my mailing, I advised him that while the job posting had disappeared, I remained wholeheartedly interested and would consider myself incredibly privileged to support him.
A day later, the recruiter conducting this job search advised me that the position was a hybrid role, not remote and that I needed to live in Ohio to be considered. I asked if an exception could be made and was told it couldn’t. I thanked her and asked her to keep me in mind if anything changed.
My friends and former executives told me not to give up. I assured them I wouldn’t – and began earnestly praying for God to make His plans known. No matter what, I wouldn’t stop seeking His will. As I always do when requesting my Heavenly Father’s guidance, I ask Him to open or shut the door completely. Amid my prayers, I gathered hope when the executive I’d written to replied to me, himself, and said he’d be in touch. Still, I surrendered anew and committed to waiting for God’s direction.
The week before Christmas, just a day after submitting my two-week notice of resignation and three days after God blessed us with David’s original house offer, the same recruiter that told me the position required me to live in Cleveland, wrote me again, revising her statement to say that the position was now open to being remote. She ended by saying that she wanted to speak to me. I immediately called her.
A half-hour later, I was scheduled for a virtual interview with the executive in question – just two days before Christmas. I couldn’t have been more excited – nor could I have thanked God more for this complete change in circumstance that His hand had provided.
The morning of my interview, I reached out to one of my current colleagues – a young lady whose father is a Samaritan’s Purse chaplain. Throughout the past months, I had struggled with her presumed wholehearted acceptance of the New Age concepts I’d so viscerally rejected as a Christian. I had recently notified her and my other team members of my impending departure and wanted her, in particular, to know why I was leaving. I was also hoping to understand better why she’d so wholly embraced the non-Christian principles I knew her evangelical father rejected.
While my friend respectfully listened as I shared my concerns about the New Age practices she was embracing, she remained unfazed at my revelations – including those about her company’s partnership with the reincarnationists at the Researchers of Truth I detailed in my blog – The Lost World of New Age Religion. I encouraged her to call me back to discuss her faith. She never did.
As I hung up, I told David how disheartened I was, saying, “I gave her every opportunity to affirm our shared faith. She never did.”
“You did all you could, love,” David said. “She heard your heart. The rest is up to her.”
Realizing how close I was to my interview time, I began to panic. I’d not prepared much for this important interview, and my eyes were a puffy mess from crying. “If I get this job, it’s because of God,” I told David. “I’m just giving it all to Him.”
“You’ve got this,” David said. “He’s going to love you!”
Forty-five minutes later, I was all smiles. “Our time ran over and he never rushed,” I told David. “I feel good about everything – but it’s all up to God.” I had no idea what would happen next.
Every Christmas Day, I send all my friends digital messages of God’s love. This year, I felt led to do the same with the executive I’d soon be leaving, even though I know she’s an atheist. After praying with David and asking God to bless my words and open my boss’s heart, I sent her a link to Matthew West’s song, “Because of Bethlehem.” My accompanying text read, “This is why I am blessed. This is the love that exists in every fiber of my body. I am who I am because of Bethlehem.”
I had no idea how she’d respond, but I followed the Holy Spirit’s prompting to send the message. This beautiful song contains the gospel message wrapped up in a four-and-a-half-minute video, and I knew she needed to hear it. I prayed with David before sending the video – asking God to open her heart to His love. A half-hour later, I received her two-word response: “So beautiful.”
While I didn’t expect much, knowing that she’d watched the video made me happy – and I told her so. Through my tears, I thanked her for listening while affirming my love for her. I hope that she will see my love as the living embodiment of God’s.
My new prayer is that my former boss’s eyes will be opened, and she will know Christ’s love, herself, one day. I can only hope that my words, actions, and prayers will long be remembered now that I’m gone. My earnest belief is that they will think about my testimony in the days to come and wonder about the person who was the first to quit their company and their culture – or so my former boss told me. I hope they heard my reasons for doing so and will never forget my unflinching faith.
David’s beautiful hand-built barn/shed behind his VA Beach house stands as a testament to his amazing skills.
On January 2nd, 2025, our move-out day had finally arrived. David and I picked up a 26-foot U-Haul truck that morning and began loading it in the frigid wind, thanking God anew for bringing us to this incredible day I’d often wondered if we’d ever see.
“Loading Day” began with our initial load of David’s piano onto the 26′ U-Haul truck.
My last day at my company was Tuesday, December 31st – and the missing weight from my shoulders was palpable. I can hardly express how freeing it was to let that job go and re-surrender everything to my Savior. January 2nd was “Loading Day.” David and I were excited to begin the next chapter of our lives in the new year – giving everything anew to our Heavenly Father.
David’s Canadian canoe and a score of tools rapidly filled the space in our moving truck.
When we sat down to lunch that day, I looked at my phone and realized I’d missed a text from the recruiter at my former job. “Call me when you can,” was all the message relayed.
“Call her now! And don’t go in the other room,” David exclaimed. “I want to be here when you call her back.”
David’s blue and grey house, built in 1962, used to be white and red before his painting, custom-built front deck, shutters, new roof, and timbered landscaping completely changed the look of the property.
“I will,” I responded, “but you must be quiet. They want someone professional in this role so there can’t be any noise in the background. Not even chewing,” I told David.
Less than a minute later, I pumped my fist in the air, and David yelled, “Hallelujah!”
We both laughed with joy. So much for professionalism, I thought, even as I, too, shared in the enthusiasm.
“I’m sorry,” I told the recruiter. “That was my husband, and we’re both just excited.”
She laughed and exclaimed, “That’s okay. Woo hoo!”
After hanging up, I stared at David in disbelief. “I just quit my job two days ago,” I said. “And now this? The recruiter didn’t even tell me what they’d pay me – saying she’ll let me know when my soon-to-be new boss returns from his Christmas vacation. He told her not to wait, and to begin onboarding me. What a God we serve!”
“Loading Day just turned into Hallelujah Day!” I declared to David as tears fell down my face. “Yay, God!”
“Yay, God,” David affirmed with tears in his eyes. “Look at what He has done!” After laughing, hugging, and rejoicing, I thought my face might explode from smiling.
That night, David and I sold his primary bedroom set after listing it on Facebook Marketplace. The buyer was a Panamanian Christian who brought friends from her church to help her load the bedroom set in her truck. She is a single mom and needed the set for a friend coming to visit her in a few weeks. I couldn’t help testifying to her, too – telling her how quickly we’d sold the house and how God had just given me a new job that day.
This beautiful space used to be a single-car garage before David converted it – floor to ceiling – to a bonus room with all new electrical outlets, a full walk-in closet, Pergo flooring, recessed lighting, and side-yard exit.
“Amen,” she said. “God is good!”
“We can never outgive our Heavenly Father,” I replied. “His grace is greater than any of us could ever imagine!” I rejoiced anew at how God had helped us sell David’s final furniture to another one of His children who needed it. My testimonies are overflowing, as is God’s mercy.
The next day, David and I spent the morning finishing our packing. While I commented that we might want to stay another day, David was ready to head to GA.
David’s fully renovated kitchen features granite counters, stainless steel appliances, custom-tiled backsplash, a ceramic-tiled floor, kitchen pass-through wall, and a hidden pocket door to separate it from the new bonus room.
After finishing our final cleaning, I was eager to start our 9-hour drive south. David stopped me. “We need to pray before we leave.”
As David and I stood in the living room of the home we were preparing to leave, we knew that our Heavenly Father had blessed us above and beyond anything we could have ever imagined. Through his tears, David thanked God for every step of the journey that had led him to surrender his life to His Savior.
David and I said our final prayer of thanks to God while standing in his renovated living room. His sculpted arch doorways and custom-built pass-through wall lead to the bedrooms and bath (left) and kitchen (middle back).
David spent the last forty-four years living in VA Beach – lonely and unsatisfied. It took his complete surrender to Christ for our Heavenly Father to bring us to that moment. None of this might have happened without God’s grace and unfathomable love. We might have missed all our current blessings had each of us not been willing to yield our will to our Creator.
David and I raise our arms to shout “Yay, God” for the kazillionth time in celebration of his house sale and our completed project.
Two hours later, while following David in the moving truck, I received a call from the recruiter with the payment offer she told me she wouldn’t have until the following week. I nearly drove off the road when she told me my new hourly wage.
The offer they were giving me was more than they had listed in the job description. It was more than I ever thought I’d ever make – even with annual bonuses over several years. The pay she detailed was more than I could fully contemplate. How did this happen? How could this be true? When the recruiter asked me if their offer was agreeable, I told her I was just happy to be back. “Anything above receiving this job is just icing on the cake,” I responded. “You just made my year!”
As I drove down I-95 to GA in David’s SUV, I had to call David in the moving truck to share the news about God’s latest shower of blessings.
After hanging up, I called David. “You won’t believe it,” I told him. “The recruiter just called me with their offer. Whenever I feel that God has blessed me more than I deserve, He blesses me even more!” With absolute joy, I continued, “What a God we serve!”
And so, here I am, one week into my new job that God knew He’d give me when I left the company the first time. All I had to do was trust and obey – just as I did when I went to FL to serve Him in 2022. It was there after my initial act of surrender that He gave me the husband He created for me.
And now, He’s given me a job beyond anything I could have achieved alone. None of this would have happened had I not heeded God’s call to go to Nineveh and testify about my faith. Of that, I have no doubt. I would never have applied for this job had I stayed – and I don’t believe I would have received this pay outside of God’s provision. This type of blessing can only have come from my Savior.
I am more grateful than words can ever verbalize. Every time I surrender and say, “I give it all to you, Father,” He brings down blessings in such a way that I can never explain. Every time David and I pray, our litany of thanks is a mile-long.
No matter what happens, we know our Creator is at work. We trust Him with our lives and our entire existence. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)
While January 2nd will always be known as my “Hallelujah Day,” I am continually blessed – every single day. God’s provision may not rain down on me with such magnitude as it did at the start of this year, but it’s always with me. Every day, I begin my prayers by thanking God for everything He’s given me: a comfortable home, a job, clothing, good health, food in the fridge, and an overflowing pantry. Healthy or sick, joyful or distressed, God is always with me – always taking care of me. Of that, I have no doubt.
As the perfect ending to a glorious day, God painted the sky with his majesty as we drove home to GA.
Most of all, I thank God for the love that surrounds me. I have the love of a God-given husband, and I have always had the same from my Heavenly Father. I know that both these loves existed before I was even born – before time began. No matter what I do or how I surrender my life to Him, I can never give back as much as I’ve received. Every day is Hallelujah Day to me.
Luke 6:38 reminds us to “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” My life is living evidence of this truth. I pray that your life also embodies the same.
God’s mercy and grace surround all of us – in abundant seasons and in times of drought. He will never leave us or forsake us. If we only surrender all to Jesus, He will always give us back more than we could ever give.
Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses. (1 Timothy 6:12)
So much has happened over the past few weeks that I can hardly put it all into words. I’m dividing my thoughts into multiple blogs to do justice to these life-changing events. This first post will begin where I left off – chronicling what happened following my decision to quit my job without a safety net.
As mentioned in The Darkness Will Not Overwhelm the Light, I lived out my missionary friend’s challenge to go to Nineveh – figuratively if not physically – and testified to everyone I could about my faith. While I will never know if my words and actions meant anything to anyone, I was far from through presenting my case to my team members.
Upon completing my business trip to London, I arrived home physically and mentally exhausted. Between an early morning flight, delayed departure, and an hour-long wait to get through Customs, I nearly missed my connection to Jacksonville, FL. While my suitcase was not so fortunate, I’m grateful to American Airline’s concierge service, which hand-delivered my bag to my home overnight – just in time for my next trek to VA Beach.
While I planned to return to help David finalize his renovations and place his house on the market, I soon learned that David had secretly finished everything while I was traveling. In fact, David had already put a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard and had a showing scheduled for the following afternoon – the very day I was driving back up to help him. After nearly two years of renovation work with considerable delays and unforeseen challenges, completion seemed incomprehensible to me.
And yet, David had done it all. Not only had he nearly single-handedly renovated his house – top to bottom – he was ready to begin showcasing his handiwork, hoping the right person might see it and purchase the property. Without any form of advertising or the use of any realty services, he scheduled someone to visit the property on his own – a staggering accomplishment, to say the least.
After a good night’s rest, I set out with our two kitties and began my northward travel. I was excited about seeing David again and eager to tell him my plans to trust God and quit my job. I felt peace and joy on that ride, knowing that my Heavenly Father controlled everything.
It was great to know that we were finally ending the renovation work. Since David and I met, he’s done nothing but renovate and restore homes. In Ft. Myers, he and I worked and lived in the house we gutted with Samaritan’s Purse – as detailed in my blog post: “Building an ark is never easy but always worth it.”
David then went on to restore and rebuild a second home in Ft. Myers – completing all but a few small projects. He would have finished it all were it not for another essential engagement he had to keep – getting married to me just five months after we met in a disaster zone while serving with Samaritan’s Purse (see Surrender – Samaritan’s Purse Deployment, Part 7).
When our Perfectly Loved saga culminated in our wedding, the renovation work of David’s house began in earnest. One year and nine months later, we were finally ending what we’d lived with as long as we’d been married – traveling between two states each month to renovate and sell his former house. It almost seemed too good to be true, yet here we were, standing on the precipice of something extraordinary.
Fifteen minutes after David’s house showing began, I called to ask if he was parked close to see how long the Realtor took with his prospects. “They were inside with me for 15 minutes,” David replied. “They’re out back now.”
“You’re there?” I asked incredulously. “I didn’t realize that. You’re showing the house yourself?”
“Yes,” David said. “I never intended for anyone to come in without me being here.” While I was still on the phone with him, the buyers returned to ask more questions.
After they left, David called to tell me that the buyers were builders themselves who were helping their friend buy his first home. “They loved it,” David said. “It was great to hear them appreciate all the quality work I’d put into the renovation. They could totally understand my vision.”
Hearing this news made me happy, as I knew no matter what, David had received validation of his skills with this visit. “I’m so proud of you, David!” I told him. “You are amazing! No matter what happens, I’m so glad you heard this affirmation of your incredible abilities from someone who could really appreciate all your hard work.”
After hanging up, I continued my drive, even more excited than ever to see David. I sang along with every praise song on my Pandora app – eagerly anticipating sharing my decision to quit my job with my husband. I knew this was just the start of good things to come.
Less than an hour later, David called me back on Facetime – while I was driving. “Are you ready?” he began.
“Oh, my gosh,” I replied. “Tell me! I’m ready!”
“We got a full price offer!” David exclaimed. “Full price! The Realtor just called me back. He’s writing everything up now.”
“Oh, my gosh!” I replied. “I’m so happy for you, love! You deserve this so much! But wow! You just put the sign up. This is absolutely incredible!”
“It is, love,” David replied. “We did this together. And you know what this means? Quit your job, love. We’re going to be okay. You need to quit your job.”
Hearing these words spoken out loud nearly undid me. As the tears poured down my face, I was speechless. David didn’t know I’d already decided to do just that.
“David,” I was finally able to say. “You just don’t know. God is so good! I hadn’t even told you this yet, but I spent my entire flight back from London writing my next blog. I made a decision yesterday morning to give everything to God and stop saying, ‘I trust God, but…’ I wanted to tell you in person that I was going to quit and give everything to Him. And now, less than a day later, you’ve sold the house? I can hardly believe what a God we serve! Look at what great things He has done!”
As David laughed, the two of us praised our Heavenly Father together. I told him a scriptural passage perfectly summarized how I felt. Ephesians 3: 20-21 says, “Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.”
I reminded David that when we surrender – just as we both did when He gave us each other in FL – He gives us more than we can ever ask for and imagine. After hanging up, I called my brother, mom, and best friend to share the incredible news with all of them. We all laughed, cried, and praised God together – all while I was driving to see my husband after one of the longest journeys of my life.
Upon arriving in VA Beach, I could hardly get out of the car fast enough to throw my arms around my husband in celebration. God had given David affirmation of his talent and abilities and brought a buyer to our home just two days after putting a yard sign out – a nearly impossible feat in a challenging real estate market.
But nothing is impossible with Christ. That fact has been consistently affirmed throughout my lifetime.
And now, my exodus from Nineveh would continue in earnest – with a new testimony affirming my stance. What I’d prayed for and had countless others pray for with me over the entire three-month period I worked at my former job was coming to fruition. I was quitting for the first time in my lifetime without another job lined up. Nevertheless, I had complete peace in doing so.
Even without David’s house sale, I knew we would be okay. But, boy, oh boy, was I glad I had decided to leave and trust God without a safety net. It makes the results even more astonishing. I trusted God, and He immediately rained down His blessings on me and David in affirmation of my faith.
The next day, I was eager to quit, but it was not meant to be. My boss returned from London extremely sick, so I needed to postpone my resignation discussion until the next day. It was hard to contain myself then, but I did so, as I knew I needed to do this the right way – face-to-face over Zoom since we couldn’t meet in person. When I finally shared the news with her, she was shocked.
I started the conversation by repeating her words from a previous team meeting. “Yesterday, you mentioned that ‘intentionality around culture is so important.’ You told us that we need to ‘feel it, breathe it, live it.’”
As she sat up in her chair, eagerly anticipating me saying that I was wholly on board, I hit her with the opposite. “I can’t do that,” I said instead.
Her face immediately altered, and she sat back hard in her chair. “I’m sorry,” she replied. “What did you say? I’m not sure I heard you.”
“I can’t do that,” I repeated. “It’s been an honor to work for you and I have great respect for you, but this isn’t the job for me. If I may, I’d like to read you something I’ve prepared in explanation.”
After expressing her disappointment and with her hand on her heart, my boss invited me to proceed.
“This role requires someone to embrace your culture,” I began. “That culture stands in direct contrast to my faith. There is a difference between the religion of Christianity and someone who has a relationship with Jesus Christ. I have the latter. As an evangelical Christian, my life revolves around my relationship with Jesus Christ. He is my Lord and Savior. Jesus is the light of the world. He saved my soul, and His blood covers my sins. I don’t need anything more than Him.”
“I don’t need to meditate on myself to feel peace,” I continued. “My JOY comes from putting Jesus first, Others second, and then myself. What I’ve seen here is that finding Self through spiritual practices is what is fostered. That mindset stands in direct opposition to my beliefs.”
“My meditation focuses on following Christ with my whole life. Doing so means everything to me. My daily walk with my Heavenly Father is what I feel, breathe, and live. It’s what my life is built upon – and there is no compromise in that.”
“You need someone in this role who embraces your culture and wants this job to be their life. That can never be me. As I said when I accepted the role, I can’t worship anything other than God the Father, Jesus Christ His Son, and the Holy Spirit. I worship the Divine Creator – not what He created, including myself. Anything apart from that is blasphemous to me and hurts my spirit. I can’t ever support that mindset.”
With all that said, I gave my two-week notice and surrendered everything to God – again. I wasn’t sure what would follow, but what my Heavenly Father gave me was astounding. Both virtually and in writing, my boss told me she admired me for standing for my faith. “You have a beautiful heart, and I admire your commitment to listening to your own inner wisdom about what is the next best step for you,” she wrote in response to my official resignation letter.
At her request, I only notified a few others I worked with about my departure – which, blessedly, came during the holidays, so many of my team members were on vacation. No matter who I wrote, I was determined to keep shining my light and praising my Savior, who I knew would sustain me. I will save a few of the responses I received for a future post.
And now, I must return to my story regarding David’s house sale, as we eventually turned down our initial offer. The buyer wanted us to pay nearly $10,000 in his closing costs – which we didn’t feel David’s hard work warranted. Stepping out in faith, we again showed the house to two more prospects. The first wanted to rent it and said he’d crunch the numbers and get back to us. He never did.
The second showing occurred after a potential buyer stopped by with her grandchildren. We couldn’t let her in as I was on a work call during her first impromptu visit. She arranged to come back a few days later with her Realtor. Before leaving, she made another full-price offer – this time without a clause for us to pay a thing. The buyer gave us her earnest money before leaving in her car. After passing two home inspections with flying colors, we sold the house – again.
This time, the buyer and her Realtor were both Christians. This time, we all gave God the praise and glory before anyone even left the house. This time, we knew God ordained the sale – just one week after we put a “For Sale by Owner” sign in the yard – to a buyer who didn’t even live in the neighborhood, without a Realtor to help us or with any form of advertisement other than a yard sign.
This time, our Heavenly Father brought a Christian buyer who will bring her grandchildren and a continual line of foster pets into the home that David and I always prayed would be alive and joyful after we left. We could not be more grateful!
David and I share a hug and smile while loading our U-Haul truck after selling his renovated VA Beach house.
David’s house sale will finalize mid-January 2025, and the last day of my employment was December 31st. What follows will have to wait until my next post.
Suffice it to say that God is sufficient. As 2 Corinthians 9:8 tells us, “God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.” God’s Word also says, “Consequently, He is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through Him, since He always lives to make intercession for them.” (Hebrews 7:25)
I went to Nineveh and did what God asked me to do. I testified to His power and mercy before, during, and after I walked through the door of this pagan city and culture. I knew this would be a difficult journey – but God sustained me. Throughout all the tears, questioning, and prayers that I and others submitted on my behalf, I never doubted God would see me through it all. Still, the way that He did continues to astound me.
We can never outgive God – even if all we give is ourselves. Our Heavenly Father sacrificed His Son on the cross to save us from paying the cost of our sins. There can be no more extraordinary gift or significant demonstration of love than that. How could I ever keep my light – God’s light inside of me – undercover, sustaining anything other than what God asks me to?
The answer is I can’t, and I won’t. Hebrews 10:23 reminds us to “hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.”
God’s faithfulness sustained me through my journey out of Nineveh. God’s mercy saved me from any further days of living in an oppressive environment. God’s love held me up when I was beaten down by the spiritual forces that were battling to silence my witness. And God’s power gave me the voice to sing His praise and testify to His all-sustaining grace.
I am unashamed to give my thanks, praise, and glory to God. How could I not? Look at the great things He has done!
For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41: 13)
“The darkness will not overwhelm You, but sometimes it can overwhelm us. Give Sara your strength and perfect peace. Send your angels to surround her and help her escape to the place where you want to plant her feet.” – Pastor Gerry, St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.
The first time I was approached by a recruiter on LinkedIn and invited to apply for my current position, I knew this company wasn’t one I could support. I initially turned the recruiter down as I had no desire to proceed.
And yet here I am.
I sometimes wonder how any of this happened. How could I have accepted a position in a place that seemed counter to my beliefs? Was I fooled, misguided, led astray, beguiled, or just foolish?
After being approached by the recruiter again, I wondered if God wanted me there to bring His Light into the darkness. “Maybe I’m supposed to be in this role for a specific reason or purpose,” I told my husband, David.
And so I applied – and prayed. If this isn’t what I should do, Lord, shut the door. Instead of shutting it, He blew the door right off the hinges.
From my first interview, I testified about my faith. “I am a Christian,” I told my boss when she asked me to talk about my spiritual journey. “My faith is everything to me. It’s who I am.” I rejoiced at that testimony, knowing that no matter what happened, I had been unashamed to stand for Christ.
I testified again to my boss before signing the agreement to work for my employer. “There are lines I can’t cross,” I explained. “I cannot offer any praise, honor, or adoration to any deity other than to God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. To do so would be blasphemy to me.”
“I understand,” came the response. “I completely respect that.”
And yet she doesn’t. Every day, I’m unhappy – with the job, the lifestyle, and the culture. Every day since I started, this job has been wrong for me – on multiple levels.
After drawing that first line, my boss introduced me to a former missionary, Mark, who told me how he’d met the billionaire funding this enterprise – along with his wife, the CEO. He said that he liked and admired them. He is also fully funded by them, as well.
“Their wealth burdens them,” Mark explained. “They feel compelled to ‘do good’ with it. If I had to comment on their beliefs, I’d say they are misguided. I could also say that they are not moving in the direction that I prefer. Still, I have no qualms about their sincerity.”
Mark’s description might be the worst depiction of lost souls I’ve ever heard. “Not moving in the direction that I prefer”? Just wow.
I’ve long suspected that Mark’s heart is not as burdened at the idolatry and spiritualism in all this as I am since he told me he’s known, worked with, and bound his organization to these philanthropists for financial reasons for years. Knowing and working with them is one thing. It’s quite another to attend their annual 2-week retreat and participate in their energy transference sessions, which Mark has done. That’s something I could never do.
Mark’s wife, he admitted, believes the organization is a cult. She is not happy with his involvement. I think he’s compromised his faith due to his shared business involvement with them since they are his corporation’s only financial backer.
What I know is that this company’s culture is entirely pagan. In addition to partnering with so-called Christian mystics who believe in reincarnation and clairvoyant healers who believe in energy transference, placing giant stones on the land and crystals throughout their offices to supposedly “transfer and receive energy,” practicing meditation sessions that involve bringing one’s “Divine Self” into one’s body, and asking “permission” from the woods before entering it, they also house a spiritual “school of consciousness” on a European property that trains future spiritualists to facilitate their practices.
The executive director of this school notes in her biography that she is the daughter of a “full-trance medium” while wholly acknowledging that one needs “protection” during their practices. In her own words, “Old world teachers and occultists are reborn in this setting.” The more I learn, the more I know I need to get away from all of this.
While researching this school, I discovered a recorded meditation that validated everything I believed about their ungodly mindset. What I saw and heard shocked me with its mockery of God’s divinity.
In one video, the spiritual “guide” – the school’s founder – leads listeners to “Follow the beam of Light that is anchored in your heart up into the greater source above you. Know that you are in a body of matter, and you are also a source of Light.”
“Here, in the center of the earth, you’ll find the ‘I am,'” explained the guide. “Bring the ‘I am’ up from the earth, through your inner beam of Light, and out into the heavens.”
I couldn’t listen any further – research or no research. What I’d heard was blasphemy against God, the one and only “I am” – as repeatedly referenced throughout scripture. The below references offer only a few examples of this:
“I am El-Shaddai — ‘God Almighty.'” (Genesis 17:1)
“I Am Who I Am. Say this to the people of Israel: I Am has sent me to you.” (Exodus 3:14)
And God said to Moses, “I amYahweh — ‘the Lord.'” (Exodus 6:2)
“Be still and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” (Psalm 46:10)
Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. (Isaiah 41:10
“I am the Lord; that is my name! I will not give my glory to anyone else, nor share my praise with carved idols.” (Isaiah 42:8)
I, yes I, am the Lord, and there is no other Savior. (Isaiah 43:11)
“From eternity to eternity I am God. No one can snatch anyone out of my hand. No one can undo what I have done.” (Isaiah 43:13)
This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer and Creator: “I am the Lord, who made all things.” (Isaiah 44:24)
“Remember the things I have done in the past. For I alone am God! I am God, and there is none like me.” (Isaiah 46:9)
“I, yes I, am the one who comforts you. So why are you afraid of mere humans, who wither like the grass and disappear?” (Isaiah 51:12)
“For I am the Lord! If I say it, it will happen.” (Ezekiel 12:25)
“I am the Lord, and I do not change.” (Malachi 3:6)
Jesus answered, “I am. And in the future, you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of God, the Powerful One, and coming on clouds in the sky.” (Mark 14:62)
“I am the light of the world. The person who follows me will never live in darkness but will have the light that gives life.” (John 8:12)
Jesus answered, “I tell you the truth, before Abraham was even born, I am!” (John 8:58)
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me will have life even if they die. (John 11:25)
Jesus answered, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. The only way to the Father is through me.” (John 14:6)
“Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me.” (John 14:11)
The Lord God says, “I am the Alpha and the Omega. I am the One who is and was and is coming. Iam the Almighty.” (Revelation 1:8)
And yet, the people I work with believe they can find the “I am” in themselves, the earth below them, and the heavens. Such a thing can never be. There is only one “I am.” He is the God of all creation. You can’t find God by visualizing yourself bringing Him into your body – which is what these pagan teachings suggest. Only through accepting Jesus Christ as one’s Lord and Savior can anyone experience the true “I am.”
In hindsight, Mark was correct when he said, “You are jumping right into the deep end. You’re like Jonah entering Nineveh.”
Ironically, Mark’s timing was nearly spot-on, too. Only a few months into my job, I traveled to the U.K. for work while my daily Bible reading led me to travel into the biblical Nineveh. Mark’s words reflected in my mind while I was there.
I’d dreaded the trip from the first time I learned about it. I knew it would be a mental and spiritual journey, and I was right. I hadn’t been under such work duress since I traveled to France while working as the assistant to a university president eight years ago.
With only a few hours of sleep on the overnight flight to London, I was expected to remain sunny, bright, and constantly social as we met with our U.K. counterparts for an afternoon ice skating activity that quickly became the living embodiment of my social awkwardness. The drinking began as everyone (but me) gushed over how much they loved the company. It started early, at 3:30 pm, with much imbibing of mulled wine and cocktails over the next several hours.
London’s ice skating rink at Somerset House – surrounded by the King’s College campus.
This practice continued in earnest at the “winter party” the following evening – a party we had traveled across the ocean to attend. Apart from the cocktails, the steady stream of refilled wine glasses before, during, and after dinner rendered everyone (but me and perhaps one or two others) completely inebriated – as was evidenced by a video later circulated in our company’s group text.
Fortunately, I strategically extracted myself from this dinner when the laughter and boisterous behavior turned into exuberant dancing. Seeing my boss move to the restroom and another team member to the cloakroom, I grabbed my coat, mouthing “thank you” to our hostess and waving goodbye while walking as fast as I could out of the exit.
Later that evening, I dared to open the gift bags we’d been presented earlier. Amidst the bottle of champagne and notepad I received, there was a book of the Spiritual Poems of Rumi. With curiosity, I skimmed the book to determine if it was as unfettered as I presumed it would be.
It was.
Muhammad Balkhi Rumi was an Afghani mystic who lived between 1207-1244. During his lifetime, he served as an Islamic scholar and teacher, writing 65,000 verses – many of which were quatrains.
A sample page from The Spiritual Poems of Rumi that was provided to me as a gift from my employer.
Some of these poems are Rumi’s exposition on the meaninglessness of life. Others speak of death and his belief that the afterlife is nothing more than a return to the collective universe, as is evidenced in his poem, Again my soul:
the day my soul begins the journey to the skies is the day my body is scattered all over the earth but if you write “rise” in the ground with your finger I’ll jump out of the earth and my body again will come to life
With these crazy thoughts – seemingly embraced by my company – swirling in my head, I began our next day’s venture.
Saturday was our last day in the U.K. Our team had planned to partake in a tour of London together via a city Hop On Hop Off bus. Only 3 of the 13 people invited to participate joined me in seeing the city after the prior night’s festivities.
A double-decker tour bus waits outside St. Paul’s Cathedral in London.
About 45 minutes into the tour, the bus stopped at St. Paul’s Cathedral, and I knew I needed to get off. It was here that I parted with my group to experience this beautiful church. After two days of associating with New Agers, I was more than ready to be in a place where I felt comfortable – God’s house.
St. Paul’s Cathedral exterior, London, England.
Upon entering the cathedral, I discovered I’d have to pay an entrance fee of 25 British Pounds to tour the sanctuary. Since I wanted to pray more than anything, I moved to the free chapel to the left of the main sanctuary. After beseeching my Heavenly Father to show me how to escape my job, a female chaplain entered the space, asking everyone what brought us to their church.
The free chapel inside London’s St. Paul’s Cathedral, where I prayed during my trip.
When she came to me, I didn’t need to say much for her to sense the pain in my heart. She quickly moved into the pew beside me and invited me to talk. I poured out my heart to her.
Chaplain Gerry and I share a smile after she prayed with me in St. Paul’s Cathedral.
“Spiritual warfare is a powerful thing,” the chaplain began. “We need to continually ask God to give us strength even while we’re praying for His protection and guidance.”
The chaplain, whose name I learned was Gerry, asked if she could pray for me. To my impassioned affirmation, she did so.
Exterior front and side of St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.
“Guide Sara’s feet,” Gerry beseeched, “and show her where to plant them.” While Gerry petitioned God for my protection, she said something I’d never considered. “The darkness will never overwhelm You, [Lord], but it can overwhelm us.”
What a beautiful reminder, I thought. I felt such strength, comfort, and relief from those words. My Savior is in control of everything. I am reminded of that fact every day.
She could only smile when I told Gerry I’d been prayed over by a street preacher the night before and by chaplains at Samaritan’s Purse in Asheville, NC. I also explained how David and I met, which led her to ask, “What does your husband think about all this?”
Me and the London street preachers that prayed with me during my visit.
“He told me to quit,” I replied. “As did the Samaritan’s Purse chaplain. I trust God, but it’s hard to think of quitting without another job waiting for me. I’ve never done that before.”
“God will show you what to do,” she ended.
I left the chapel with extreme gratitude, knowing that my Heavenly Father would continue to guide me.
The afternoon’s challenges continued as my tour bus never returned to pick up many of us who had hopped off to see Buckingham Palace. Darkness soon descended during the hour and a half we stood waiting in the cold. I knew then that I’d never return to the hotel in time for our group’s evening activities.
After calling my boss and admitting the same, I began walking, seeking shelter from the frigid air. In addition to my distress at the bus never coming and the icy cold that had permeated my bones, I was flustered by the thought that my boss would perceive this as another failure.
Throughout the journey, I sensed her frustration with me. I wasn’t participating. I didn’t have all the peripheral transportation items on her calendar that she wanted (a fact she texted to me while we were seated directly opposite one another during our first afternoon’s lunch).
And then there’s the fact that I couldn’t fake enthusiasm for a trip I didn’t want to be on while everyone else was excited to be there. In short, I felt angst at not performing well and realized I could never be myself at this job.
On the last morning of our trip, I woke up with a new commitment to trust God wholeheartedly. I knew I could no longer say, “I trust God, but…”. I know I need to leave this role. It’s time for me to evidence trust with every ounce of my being – including believing that God will sustain me if I leave my job without another one already in place.
“I do trust you, God,” I prayed that morning, tears streaming down my face. “I’m going to take that trust a step further and give this job to you. I will give my 2-week notice this week.”
As validation of the rightness of this decision, I discovered that my boss had circulated a plan for our group to meet in January to hold a “team practice day.” Translation? She wants to facilitate an all-day activity with an “alignment meditation” as they do in the U.K.
I previously determined that I’d never participate in one of these activities. After researching my work’s “Team Practice” page, I learned that the ideals espoused in these sessions are entirely humanistic and blasphemous. One of the alignment practices repeats the search for “The Light That I AM” that I discussed earlier in this post.
Meditative alignment practices detailed on my work’s Team Practice Page.
I’ve already found the “I AM.” He is GOD – my Heavenly Father, the Author and Finisher of everything. The Creator of all humanity is not someone I’m going to locate through the “magnetism of the earth and the current of light from the higher dimensions” that my work’s website details, nor can I breathe Him into myself of my own accord or find that the I AM is really me, myself, and I – as they seem to believe.
Instead, all I have to do is “Be still and know that I am God!” as Psalm 46:10 tells me. I have felt the presence of the Almighty I AM my entire life while my teammates are still searching for Him.
I cannot support cultural practices that are so far from God. I will no longer give any implied consent to their mindset and mission. I can now leave my job, knowing I’ve gone to Nineveh. I testified to thirteen people while I was there. I told anyone who would listen about how God brought David and I together, my surrender to my Heavenly Father, and my peace in knowing where I will go when God calls me home. All but one of these people walked away while I was talking.
I have done my part. While I didn’t cry out in the streets as Jonah did, I now know I can leave, fulfilling my promise to stand for my faith in every possible way. It’s not up to us to save anyone. Only our Creator can do so. He just told us to obey whatever He tells us to do.
Now is the time for me to trust that my Heavenly Father will lead me forward and that He will “place my feet where He wants them next,” as Chaplain Gerry said. That means I need to trust with my whole life – even without a safety net. While that thought frightens me beyond belief, it also fills me with peace.
God is in control. I may never know the reason and purpose of why I was placed in this role – but that doesn’t matter. God does. I’ve done what He asked and lived out my faith in a pagan culture. I will now leave Him to move me as He chooses.
The darkness will never overwhelm the Light – and I pray it will never overwhelm me again. If it does, I will always remember this journey.
For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41:13)
I surrender my fear, understanding, and control to you, Lord Jesus. I know you will help me. I surrender all.
