Tag: #SurrenderToGod

The darkness will not overwhelm the Light

The darkness will not overwhelm the Light

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For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41: 13)

“The darkness will not overwhelm You, but sometimes it can overwhelm us. Give Sara your strength and perfect peace. Send your angels to surround her and help her escape to the place where you want to plant her feet.” – Pastor Gerry, St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.

The first time I was approached by a recruiter on LinkedIn and invited to apply for my current position, I knew this company wasn’t one I could support. I initially turned the recruiter down as I had no desire to proceed. 

And yet here I am. 

I sometimes wonder how any of this happened. How could I have accepted a position in a place that seemed counter to my beliefs? Was I fooled, misguided, led astray, beguiled, or just foolish? 

After being approached by the recruiter again, I wondered if God wanted me there to bring His Light into the darkness. “Maybe I’m supposed to be in this role for a specific reason or purpose,” I told my husband, David. 

And so I applied – and prayed. If this isn’t what I should do, Lord, shut the door. Instead of shutting it, He blew the door right off the hinges. 

From my first interview, I testified about my faith. “I am a Christian,” I told my boss when she asked me to talk about my spiritual journey. “My faith is everything to me. It’s who I am.” I rejoiced at that testimony, knowing that no matter what happened, I had been unashamed to stand for Christ. 

I testified again to my boss before signing the agreement to work for my employer. “There are lines I can’t cross,” I explained. “I cannot offer any praise, honor, or adoration to any deity other than to God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit. To do so would be blasphemy to me.” 

“I understand,” came the response. “I completely respect that.” 

And yet she doesn’t. Every day, I’m unhappy – with the job, the lifestyle, and the culture. Every day since I started, this job has been wrong for me – on multiple levels. 

After drawing that first line, my boss introduced me to a former missionary, Mark, who told me how he’d met the billionaire funding this enterprise – along with his wife, the CEO. He said that he liked and admired them. He is also fully funded by them, as well.

“Their wealth burdens them,” Mark explained. “They feel compelled to ‘do good’ with it. If I had to comment on their beliefs, I’d say they are misguided. I could also say that they are not moving in the direction that I prefer. Still, I have no qualms about their sincerity.”

Mark’s description might be the worst depiction of lost souls I’ve ever heard. “Not moving in the direction that I prefer”? Just wow. 

I’ve long suspected that Mark’s heart is not as burdened at the idolatry and spiritualism in all this as I am since he told me he’s known, worked with, and bound his organization to these philanthropists for financial reasons for years. Knowing and working with them is one thing. It’s quite another to attend their annual 2-week retreat and participate in their energy transference sessions, which Mark has done. That’s something I could never do.

Mark’s wife, he admitted, believes the organization is a cult. She is not happy with his involvement. I think he’s compromised his faith due to his shared business involvement with them since they are his corporation’s only financial backer.

What I know is that this company’s culture is entirely pagan. In addition to partnering with so-called Christian mystics who believe in reincarnation and clairvoyant healers who believe in energy transference, placing giant stones on the land and crystals throughout their offices to supposedly “transfer and receive energy,” practicing meditation sessions that involve bringing one’s “Divine Self” into one’s body, and asking “permission” from the woods before entering it, they also house a spiritual “school of consciousness” on a European property that trains future spiritualists to facilitate their practices. 

The executive director of this school notes in her biography that she is the daughter of a “full-trance medium” while wholly acknowledging that one needs “protection” during their practices. In her own words, “Old world teachers and occultists are reborn in this setting.” The more I learn, the more I know I need to get away from all of this.

While researching this school, I discovered a recorded meditation that validated everything I believed about their ungodly mindset. What I saw and heard shocked me with its mockery of God’s divinity. 

In one video, the spiritual “guide” – the school’s founder – leads listeners to “Follow the beam of Light that is anchored in your heart up into the greater source above you. Know that you are in a body of matter, and you are also a source of Light.”

“Here, in the center of the earth, you’ll find the ‘I am,'” explained the guide. “Bring the ‘I am’ up from the earth, through your inner beam of Light, and out into the heavens.”

I couldn’t listen any further – research or no research. What I’d heard was blasphemy against God, the one and only “I am” – as repeatedly referenced throughout scripture. The below references offer only a few examples of this:

  • “I am El-Shaddai — ‘God Almighty.'” (Genesis 17:1)
  • “I Am Who I Am. Say this to the people of Israel: I Am has sent me to you.” (Exodus 3:14)
  • And God said to Moses, “I am Yahweh — ‘the Lord.'” (Exodus 6:2)
  • “Be still and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.” (Psalm 46:10)
  • Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. (Isaiah 41:10
  • “I am the Lord; that is my name! I will not give my glory to anyone else, nor share my praise with carved idols.” (Isaiah 42:8)
  • I, yes I, am the Lord, and there is no other Savior. (Isaiah 43:11)
  • “From eternity to eternity I am God. No one can snatch anyone out of my hand. No one can undo what I have done.” (Isaiah 43:13)
  • This is what the Lord says— your Redeemer and Creator: “I am the Lord, who made all things.” (Isaiah 44:24)
  • “Remember the things I have done in the past. For I alone am God! I am God, and there is none like me.” (Isaiah 46:9)
  • “I, yes I, am the one who comforts you. So why are you afraid of mere humans, who wither like the grass and disappear?” (Isaiah 51:12)
  • “For I am the Lord! If I say it, it will happen.” (Ezekiel 12:25)
  • “I am the Lord, and I do not change.” (Malachi 3:6)
  • Jesus answered, “I am. And in the future, you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of God, the Powerful One, and coming on clouds in the sky.” (Mark 14:62)
  • “I am the light of the world. The person who follows me will never live in darkness but will have the light that gives life.” (John 8:12)
  • Jesus answered, “I tell you the truth, before Abraham was even born, I am!” (John 8:58)
  • Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me will have life even if they die. (John 11:25)
  • Jesus answered, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. The only way to the Father is through me.” (John 14:6)
  • “Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me.” (John 14:11)
  • The Lord God says, “I am the Alpha and the Omega. I am the One who is and was and is coming. I am the Almighty.” (Revelation 1:8)

And yet, the people I work with believe they can find the “I am” in themselves, the earth below them, and the heavens. Such a thing can never be. There is only one “I am.” He is the God of all creation. You can’t find God by visualizing yourself bringing Him into your body – which is what these pagan teachings suggest. Only through accepting Jesus Christ as one’s Lord and Savior can anyone experience the true “I am.”

In hindsight, Mark was correct when he said, “You are jumping right into the deep end. You’re like Jonah entering Nineveh.” 

Ironically, Mark’s timing was nearly spot-on, too. Only a few months into my job, I traveled to the U.K. for work while my daily Bible reading led me to travel into the biblical Nineveh. Mark’s words reflected in my mind while I was there. 

I’d dreaded the trip from the first time I learned about it. I knew it would be a mental and spiritual journey, and I was right. I hadn’t been under such work duress since I traveled to France while working as the assistant to a university president eight years ago. 

With only a few hours of sleep on the overnight flight to London, I was expected to remain sunny, bright, and constantly social as we met with our U.K. counterparts for an afternoon ice skating activity that quickly became the living embodiment of my social awkwardness. The drinking began as everyone (but me) gushed over how much they loved the company. It started early, at 3:30 pm, with much imbibing of mulled wine and cocktails over the next several hours. 

London’s ice skating rink at Somerset House – surrounded by the King’s College campus.

This practice continued in earnest at the “winter party” the following evening – a party we had traveled across the ocean to attend. Apart from the cocktails, the steady stream of refilled wine glasses before, during, and after dinner rendered everyone (but me and perhaps one or two others) completely inebriated – as was evidenced by a video later circulated in our company’s group text. 

Fortunately, I strategically extracted myself from this dinner when the laughter and boisterous behavior turned into exuberant dancing. Seeing my boss move to the restroom and another team member to the cloakroom, I grabbed my coat, mouthing “thank you” to our hostess and waving goodbye while walking as fast as I could out of the exit. 

Later that evening, I dared to open the gift bags we’d been presented earlier. Amidst the bottle of champagne and notepad I received, there was a book of the Spiritual Poems of Rumi. With curiosity, I skimmed the book to determine if it was as unfettered as I presumed it would be. 

It was. 

Muhammad Balkhi Rumi was an Afghani mystic who lived between 1207-1244. During his lifetime, he served as an Islamic scholar and teacher, writing 65,000 verses – many of which were quatrains. 

A sample page from The Spiritual Poems of Rumi that was provided to me as a gift from my employer.

Some of these poems are Rumi’s exposition on the meaninglessness of life. Others speak of death and his belief that the afterlife is nothing more than a return to the collective universe, as is evidenced in his poem, Again my soul: 

the day my soul 
begins the journey
to the skies
is the day 
my body is scattered
all over the earth 
but if you write
“rise” in the ground 
with your finger 
I’ll jump out of the earth
and my body 
again will come to life

With these crazy thoughts – seemingly embraced by my company – swirling in my head, I began our next day’s venture.  

Saturday was our last day in the U.K. Our team had planned to partake in a tour of London together via a city Hop On Hop Off bus. Only 3 of the 13 people invited to participate joined me in seeing the city after the prior night’s festivities. 

A double-decker tour bus waits outside St. Paul’s Cathedral in London.

About 45 minutes into the tour, the bus stopped at St. Paul’s Cathedral, and I knew I needed to get off. It was here that I parted with my group to experience this beautiful church. After two days of associating with New Agers, I was more than ready to be in a place where I felt comfortable – God’s house.

St. Paul’s Cathedral exterior, London, England.

Upon entering the cathedral, I discovered I’d have to pay an entrance fee of 25 British Pounds to tour the sanctuary. Since I wanted to pray more than anything, I moved to the free chapel to the left of the main sanctuary. After beseeching my Heavenly Father to show me how to escape my job, a female chaplain entered the space, asking everyone what brought us to their church. 

The free chapel inside London’s St. Paul’s Cathedral, where I prayed during my trip.

When she came to me, I didn’t need to say much for her to sense the pain in my heart. She quickly moved into the pew beside me and invited me to talk. I poured out my heart to her.

Chaplain Gerry and I share a smile after she prayed with me in St. Paul’s Cathedral.

“Spiritual warfare is a powerful thing,” the chaplain began. “We need to continually ask God to give us strength even while we’re praying for His protection and guidance.” 

The chaplain, whose name I learned was Gerry, asked if she could pray for me. To my impassioned affirmation, she did so. 

Exterior front and side of St. Paul’s Cathedral, London, England.

“Guide Sara’s feet,” Gerry beseeched, “and show her where to plant them.” While Gerry petitioned God for my protection, she said something I’d never considered. “The darkness will never overwhelm You, [Lord], but it can overwhelm us.” 

What a beautiful reminder, I thought. I felt such strength, comfort, and relief from those words. My Savior is in control of everything. I am reminded of that fact every day. 

She could only smile when I told Gerry I’d been prayed over by a street preacher the night before and by chaplains at Samaritan’s Purse in Asheville, NC. I also explained how David and I met, which led her to ask, “What does your husband think about all this?” 

Me and the London street preachers that prayed with me during my visit.

“He told me to quit,” I replied. “As did the Samaritan’s Purse chaplain. I trust God, but it’s hard to think of quitting without another job waiting for me. I’ve never done that before.” 

“God will show you what to do,” she ended. 

I left the chapel with extreme gratitude, knowing that my Heavenly Father would continue to guide me.

The afternoon’s challenges continued as my tour bus never returned to pick up many of us who had hopped off to see Buckingham Palace. Darkness soon descended during the hour and a half we stood waiting in the cold. I knew then that I’d never return to the hotel in time for our group’s evening activities. 

After calling my boss and admitting the same, I began walking, seeking shelter from the frigid air. In addition to my distress at the bus never coming and the icy cold that had permeated my bones, I was flustered by the thought that my boss would perceive this as another failure. 

Throughout the journey, I sensed her frustration with me. I wasn’t participating. I didn’t have all the peripheral transportation items on her calendar that she wanted (a fact she texted to me while we were seated directly opposite one another during our first afternoon’s lunch).

And then there’s the fact that I couldn’t fake enthusiasm for a trip I didn’t want to be on while everyone else was excited to be there. In short, I felt angst at not performing well and realized I could never be myself at this job. 

On the last morning of our trip, I woke up with a new commitment to trust God wholeheartedly. I knew I could no longer say, “I trust God, but…”. I know I need to leave this role. It’s time for me to evidence trust with every ounce of my being – including believing that God will sustain me if I leave my job without another one already in place. 

“I do trust you, God,” I prayed that morning, tears streaming down my face. “I’m going to take that trust a step further and give this job to you. I will give my 2-week notice this week.” 

As validation of the rightness of this decision, I discovered that my boss had circulated a plan for our group to meet in January to hold a “team practice day.” Translation? She wants to facilitate an all-day activity with an “alignment meditation” as they do in the U.K. 

I previously determined that I’d never participate in one of these activities. After researching my work’s “Team Practice” page, I learned that the ideals espoused in these sessions are entirely humanistic and blasphemous. One of the alignment practices repeats the search for “The Light That I AM” that I discussed earlier in this post.

Meditative alignment practices detailed on my work’s Team Practice Page.

I’ve already found the “I AM.” He is GOD – my Heavenly Father, the Author and Finisher of everything. The Creator of all humanity is not someone I’m going to locate through the “magnetism of the earth and the current of light from the higher dimensions” that my work’s website details, nor can I breathe Him into myself of my own accord or find that the I AM is really me, myself, and I – as they seem to believe.

Instead, all I have to do is “Be still and know that I am God!” as Psalm 46:10 tells me. I have felt the presence of the Almighty I AM my entire life while my teammates are still searching for Him.

I cannot support cultural practices that are so far from God. I will no longer give any implied consent to their mindset and mission. I can now leave my job, knowing I’ve gone to Nineveh. I testified to thirteen people while I was there. I told anyone who would listen about how God brought David and I together, my surrender to my Heavenly Father, and my peace in knowing where I will go when God calls me home. All but one of these people walked away while I was talking. 

I have done my part. While I didn’t cry out in the streets as Jonah did, I now know I can leave, fulfilling my promise to stand for my faith in every possible way. It’s not up to us to save anyone. Only our Creator can do so. He just told us to obey whatever He tells us to do. 

Now is the time for me to trust that my Heavenly Father will lead me forward and that He will “place my feet where He wants them next,” as Chaplain Gerry said. That means I need to trust with my whole life – even without a safety net. While that thought frightens me beyond belief, it also fills me with peace. 

God is in control. I may never know the reason and purpose of why I was placed in this role – but that doesn’t matter. God does. I’ve done what He asked and lived out my faith in a pagan culture. I will now leave Him to move me as He chooses.

The darkness will never overwhelm the Light – and I pray it will never overwhelm me again. If it does, I will always remember this journey. 

For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41:13)

I surrender my fear, understanding, and control to you, Lord Jesus. I know you will help me. I surrender all. 
We all need Jesus

We all need Jesus

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Know that the Lord is God. It is He who made us, and we are His; we are His people, the sheep of His pasture. (Psalm 100:3)

We all need Jesus. What a profound statement that is. I’ve spent the past five weeks of my life working with people who purposely choose to deny that fact. I’m not sure I want to spend many more surrounded by such denial.  It hurts me to see such misguided pursuits. It’s one thing to know that there’s such repudiation in the world. It’s another to be in the middle of it without ever being able to speak against it or share what I know to be true – to be able to say out loud, “You all need Jesus.”

I woke at 4:45 am the other morning, knowing something had to give. After a month of work dreams and oppressed days filled with mentally and physically exhaustive actions, I’ve nearly had enough. These are not my people. I cannot support their culture.

I’ve never held a job where I’ve been pressed to join something counter to who I am – until now. I was promised that I was being hired to support my boss administratively and that I didn’t need to ascribe to the New Age ideals this environment espouses. That wasn’t true. In fairness, I don’t think my boss knew how untrue that statement was when she made her promise to me.

As an executive assistant, I can support anyone to the highest level of care that they require – whether that’s reading lines to someone in their underwear in preparation for a recorded interview (yes, I really did this) or washing dinner dishes from a 15-person event at 10:00 pm after a 15-hour work day (I did this a few days ago). I’ve traveled with my executives, packed for them, made their daily pitchers of iced tea, and reminded them of personal commitments as well as business events. I care about their families and fret over their lack of sleep. Despite the exhaustion, their support extends into my life, and I pray over and love them all.

And yet, there are lines I can’t cross. I see them everywhere in my current role, and I think it’s time for a giant step back.

The day after our national elections, my boss organized a “post-election meditation” with a friend and mentor of hers – Susan Salzberg. Susan is a woman who says things like, “We don’t need any sort of religious orientation to lead a life that is ethical, compassionate and kind.”

 While Susan’s statement may be true, what she’s forgotten is that she still needs Jesus. Life is more than being “ethical, compassionate, and kind.” It’s about worship. It’s about serving a Savior who loves us enough to send His Son to die for us. It’s about daily surrendering our lives to the only one who can ever save us. We can never do so ourselves.

Despite my desire to never participate in another guided meditation session at work, I was pressed to do so on November 6th. This time, as the group sat on porch chairs around a 56-inch mobile computer monitor to connect with Susan Salzberg via Zoom, I stood on the porch and looked out at God’s majestic mountains surrounding the campus. This time, I prayed to God with my eyes open – figuratively and literally – giving each of my team members to their Creator while praying over them as this guru guided everyone to “give themselves permission to heal.”

Instead of participating in the group “meditation,” I concentrated on worshiping the Creator of the Blue Ridge Mountains beyond the Marshall, NC campus where I stood.

The session began with my boss expressing that “we are all extremely distressed over the election of a person filled with hatred who will now govern our nation” – an opinion she assumed I shared. I don’t. She then said how our leadership team’s children “are afraid to go to school.” She continued, “We’re all so upset that we cried together earlier.”

While I knew she wasn’t speaking for me, and I can’t begin to understand her mentality, her elucidations were nothing compared to those this would-be guru of New Age cultism shared.

As the session continued, Susan responded by comparing the election to the dropping of the atomic bomb on Hiroshima. At the time, Susan explained, rumors expounded, including some that proclaimed trees would never bloom again. “They did,” she affirmed, “and people found within themselves the will to go on.”

As the half-hour session continued, I concentrated on my Savior and His created majesty. At the same time, my coworkers were led to focus on their breathing and silently meditate on questions such as “May I be healthy again?” and “May we be happy again?” Per Susan’s guidance, everyone should permit themselves to do so after raising these questions.

Susan then directed everyone to silently repeat the name of someone who made them happy while allowing themselves permission to smile in remembrance of that name. I smiled at this suggestion as I’d already been calling on the only name anyone ever needs to be happy and whole – Jesus. Jesus got me through that session, as He has every other questionable belief I’ve uncovered about this group’s mindset over the past month.

Jesus, I cried. These people are so lost. Be with them. Show Yourself to them. You are always with us. I see you in these mountains and this beautiful sky. They look inward to find their peace when Your peace already surrounds us. They can’t see You, even though You are always here. You created them, the world, and everything in it. Open their eyes, Lord. Open their hearts and help them to see You.

When the session was over, my boss effused over the empty words that she saw as healing – words that spoke to me of loss and desperation. Only God can heal the spirit, I knew. Only Christ can give us peace.

And so, after waking early to capture these thoughts, I wonder how much longer I can maintain my new role. I know I can’t be a part of this culture of madness that is seeking “mindful consciousness” when I have already found peace and security in Christ. I will never ascribe to their ideals. I can’t get excited at guided “sky gazing” – a practice our “Director of Net Offerings” detailed over lunch last week. He explained that the activity is one in which he frequently leads participants. When questioned about the activity, he clarified that – with his guidance – one can “become one with the sky and let it carry you away then gently bring you back to a better state within yourself.” I will never “recognize that both [me] and the sky are parts of the larger universe.” I know that I am not “the universe experiencing itself,” – nor will I think that “[I am] the universe looking into a mirror.”

Conversely, I am a created being, made in the image of God, and yet I can never be God – something I fear these people believe is possible. To me, such notions are blasphemous.

There is only one divine being – the triune God, Yahweh – my Heavenly Father, His Son, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit.

When exposed to such thoughts over the past month, I frequently repeat Psalm 100 to myself. This precious song has always been one of my favorites. I memorized it as a child; its words have become my daily touchstone.

Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before Him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is He who made us, and we are His; we are His people, the sheep of His pasture. Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise; give thanks to Him and praise His name. For the Lord is good, and His love endures forever; His faithfulness continues through all generations. 

We all need Jesus. I would be lost without Him, even as I believe everyone I work with is. I pray for them daily and give them all to His tender care.

I also pray that God will continue to guide me to do what He wants me to do. No matter where I look or how someone tries to guide me to see otherwise, I will always see Jesus.
God establishes our steps

God establishes our steps

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In their hearts, humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps. (Proverbs 16:9)

Being chosen is one thing. Being selected after initially rejecting, auditioning three times, and then praying for validation with absolute certainty by God is quite another feeling entirely. Please allow me to explain what I mean.

I closed my laptop for the last time at my former job a few days ago. It still hasn’t fully hit me yet, but my life is about to change dramatically with my new employer. I was recruited for this job through an executive search company. While I will still be an executive assistant, this role is entirely different because of the corporate structure, mission, and my executive’s background. My new company is small, based out of the United Kingdom, and wholly funded by a billionaire hedge fund manager the British government knighted for his philanthropic work.

If that’s not impressive enough, the executive I will support was voted as one of Fortune magazine’s “World’s 50 Greatest Leaders” – alongside Prince Harry and Meghan Markle as well as Bill and Melinda Gates in the same year. In addition to her charitable work, serving as CEO of an organization that worked to end five of the world’s Neglected Tropical Diseases (NTDs) – ultimately administering over 700 million NTD treatments – she led international programs for Operation Smile and disaster response for International Medical Corps. With service in over 70 different countries, board service to groups such as the World Economic Forum’s Global Health Security Advisory Board, and ultimately writing a book whose forward was written by Bill Gates, there can be no question as to the extraordinary work accomplished by the woman who chose me to assist her.

How on earth did I get here? How did this role ever come to find little old me? I can only answer, “It had to be God.”  I make that statement with absolute assurance. It has nothing to do with me.

For starters, I initially turned down the role after being asked to apply. While that may sound shocking, my rationale was solidly founded. First and foremost, I wasn’t sure my faith could support the prospective company I was being asked to work for.

My faith means everything to me. After my initial research into the philanthropic organization, I said, “Thanks, but no thanks,” to the recruiter – citing pay as my rationale. The salary threshold being close to my former position’s, it was simple to decline the role with that excuse.

When the recruiter reached out again – a whole week later – assuring me that the employer could go higher, I talked to David. My initial rejection was due to my faith, but that was before a small voice inside me said there may be a godly reason why you should be there. I couldn’t discount that thought.

Countless times in my past, I have felt strongly that my Heavenly Father put me in a position to be His light in a dark place. How could I so quickly turn a similar situation down? Those thoughts filled my head even before the recruiter reached out again. “I need to apply,” I told David. “God is in control. Let’s see what happens.”

What occurred next blew my mind. After submitting my application and writing sample (required in this role), I interviewed with the third-party recruiter. I was asked to meet with the search committee for a second interview one week later. Still unsure of how I felt about the role, I nevertheless wanted to do my best.

Unfortunately, my tech wouldn’t work on the interview day, and my test Zoom call with David, who was in VA Beach then, was a complete failure. “I can’t hear anything you’re saying on the call,” David said. Try as I might, my speakers wouldn’t connect.

Minutes before the interview, I told David I needed to pray.

“You’re in control, Lord Jesus,” I said. “I’m afraid I will look like an absolute fool, but I’m giving this all to you. Please help this work out if it is Your will. Your words. My lips.”

Upon connecting, the hiring manager confirmed my fears. “I can’t hear you,” Helen (name changed) said. Praying silently and frantically again, I clicked something on my computer, and miraculously, everything was perfect. I can’t even be sure what I did. The action must have emanated from God.

Forty-five minutes into the interview, Helen noted that I’d mentioned having “a strong faith” in response to how I handle stress. I further discussed my mission trip to Nicaragua after Helen talked about witnessing global poverty – something I confirmed having also seen first-hand and been affected by.

“You mentioned your faith several times,” Helen noted. “I’m curious about your spiritual journey. You know this is a non-denominational position. Tell me about your faith and how you’d handle working with others whose own path might be very different than your own.”

“I’m a Christian,” I immediately responded. “My faith governs every aspect of my life. It’s who I am and the biggest part of my character. That being said, I completely respect the fact that everyone has to make their own spiritual journey. I will never judge anyone whose experience is different from my own.”

After the interview ended -15 minutes later than initially intended – I called David and my brother to explain what happened during the call. “I’ve never been asked about my faith in an interview before,” I gushed. “No matter what happens, I feel incredibly blessed that God allowed me to testify to what I believe in. God opened my microphone, yes, but He also gave me the voice to say, ‘I’m a Christian’ in profound way.”

A week later, the hiring manager herself called to connect with me again – this time asking me to fly to meet over Labor Day, requesting an entire day to show me around their Center and spend more time with me in in-person. After working out the specifics, my ticket and overnight accommodations were purchased, and my trip was ready to begin.

Despite the devil doing everything to keep me away – including a delayed flight, a missed connection, a canceled flight, and the inability to get an Uber from the airport after midnight – I slept a few hours. I met Helen and a few of her “guests” a short time later for breakfast.

Conversations over the breakfast table left me questioning anew whether this job was right for me.

The on-site events further solidified the same musings. Over the course of the day, I heard about the “Sound Ceremony” the group celebrated the evening before, witnessed an indigenous guest stand in the mud that was “calling him,” and learned that another guest was an astrologer who frequently gave readings to those whose events she participated in.

“These people are worshiping creation,” I later told David. “I worship the Creator. I don’t know if this could ever be right.”

The 500 acres my new employer owns in North Carolina are a testament to the beauty of God’s creation.

For this reason, I told Helen I needed some time to talk to my husband before I could accept the job offer she graciously extended to me at the end of the day. “We wouldn’t have brought you here if we didn’t think you were the one we wanted in this role,” she told me. “I think you’d be perfect for it.”

I couldn’t yet say the same, and Helen was visibly stunned by my admission. I just wasn’t sure and needed to pray.

Later that evening, after talking to David, I began earnestly petitioning God.

“Lord,” I began, “I don’t know what to do. How can this be right for me? I love Helen’s heart already, and the offer is so generous – but how can I do this?”

It was then that the thought came to me, “Tell Helen how you feel.”

I had been transparent throughout every interaction I’d had to that point – even telling Helen about my past abusive relationships, something that shocked me after my admission. Instead of being horrified at my faux pax, Helen told me she was proud of me and said she knew I would use my past to help others in the future. I had been entirely candid with Helen and knew the same thing was required regarding my faith. I needed to explain my thoughts – no matter what happened.

Hard hats were required as I visited a building under construction during my all-day interview.

On the way home the next day, I reached out to one of the chaplains I’d bonded with during my first Samaritan’s Purse work. After explaining the situation and my proposed response, my friend promised to pray that I would have clear guidance regarding what I should do and say.  

Following my discussion with David upon my return to VA Beach, I asked Helen if I could talk to her the following day to clarify an important matter. We made plans to speak the next morning.

When Helen and I spoke the following day, I explained how an activity we’d shared on-site had affected me. Two days prior, Helen and another guest had laid flowers on and around a statue I didn’t recognize. The act made me pause, step back, and pray.

“Forgive me, Jesus,” I silently petitioned. “I can’t do that. That’s not right.” After learning that the statue was of a Buddhist goddess, I knew my instincts were correct. I needed to explain the same to Helen.

I picked flowers and vegetables from one of the gardens I visited on my site tour.

“In the garden,” I began, “I didn’t know anything about Quan Yin. but I knew in my heart that I couldn’t do what you were doing. Before we go further, I need to explain there are lines I can’t cross. In Christianity, I can’t offer any worship, adoration, or token to anything other than God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That’s sacred to me. I can’t cross that line.”

“I fully respect that,” Helen said. “In fact, I’ve been thinking we need a Christian on staff to help us in decision making. We may actually take that statue out as I don’t think we should have any icons of any type if we’re going to be non-denominational. If you’d like to” she continued, “I can connect you with someone who may speak your language better than I can.”

After agreeing, Helen introduced me to Mark, co-founder and CEO of Mana Nutrition, an organization that creates ready-to-use (RTU) foods to help the world’s malnourished to survive, sustain, and thrive. Mark and his wife spent ten years as missionaries in Uganda – one of the countries they now serve with their product. Incredibly, their manufacturing facility resides about 2.5 hours northwest of where I live, and they’re currently building a warehouse near my former place of employment. This additional connection to me was profound, considering that their headquarters is in NC.

Adding to that, I was surprised to learn that Mana is primarily funded by the same billionaire that bankrolls my new company. “In fact,” Mark explained, “I’ve known [your potential employer] for the past 13 years.”  

Additionally, after hearing my story of how David and I met through Samaritan’s Purse (SP), Mark told me that Mana Nutrition is the number one supplier of RTUs to SP. God’s fingerprints are all over this work – whether they even realize it or not.

As we discussed my trepidation about the role, Mark put my fears to rest. “The way I see it, you’ve been given an opportunity to be a Jesus follower in a rare spot,” – an astute observation that immediately made me smile as it put my spirit at ease. “Think about Paul speaking to the residents in Athens who worshiped so many gods that idol-makers were everywhere. “He didn’t have to go there and talk to them, but he did. We can’t sit in a box and expect to make a difference.”

Over the next few hours, Mark and I spoke of our shared faith, willingness to go wherever God leads, and do whatever we’re asked to do. “You will be challenged more than you’ve ever been in this job,” Mark observed, “but I believe you’re being called to do it.”

I was filled with God’s presence as I walked through the woods during my site tour.

An hour later, I signed the job offer letter and spoke to Helen one last time. “I’m sending you the agreement,” I told her. “I’m so excited to accept.”

“That makes me happy,” Helen said. “I heard from my number two candidate today and she wanted to meet with me in-person. I wasn’t sure what you would say so I didn’t want to turn her away – but I really wanted Sara.” I have no doubt Helen felt my joy at hearing that affirmation as I clapped my hands in response and assured her of my enthusiastic acceptance.

After petitioning God for direction and consulting with other believers, I have perfect peace about this new position. As Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no guidance the people fall, but in abundance of counselors there is victory.” How very true that is!

I always pray that God will guide my steps, open the doors that should be opened, and close those I shouldn’t walk through. Throughout this decision-making process, I believe my Heavenly Father not only opened doors but also blasted down any walls that stood in my way, saying, “Go, my child. I am with you.”

God will always guide us down the paths we should follow, just as He did with me during my all-day interview in the mountains near Marshall, NC.

I can’t even imagine what will lie ahead, but I’m excited to see where God takes me next. While I may have thought I was plotting my course a few times in life, I now know that by surrendering to my Creator, yet again, He is establishing my steps down a path I might never have taken on my own.

To be chosen is one thing. To be given the words, peace, and guidance I prayed for by God is quite another thing entirely. Above all, this I know: I am incredibly blessed.

When we’ve done everything – STAND

When we’ve done everything – STAND

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Therefore, put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. (Ephesians 6:13)

Over the past decade, our world has become decidedly darker. I don’t mean that in the literal sense, as the sun and moon continue to cycle in the same manner that they always have. I’m talking about morality, decency, and even liberty being under attack like never before in the history of humanity.

We’ve seen more than our share of wickedness permeate our society. Since same-sex marriage was legalized in in 2015, a Pandora’s box of evil and ungodliness was unleashed upon our nation. Sexuality has replaced the sanctity of life. Children are told that their gender is dependent upon how they feel rather than how God created them. Legislators, doctors, and even parents have endorsed and allowed minors to butcher their bodies without thought of their future psyches. “Pride” in sexuality is celebrated in the workplace. Our nation’s military touts gender diversity over strength and preparedness. Parents are labeled as domestic terrorists by our government’s highest agencies for daring to stand up to school boards pushing indoctrination, victimhood, and perversity on minors. Many church denominations now condone same-sex marriage and allow spiritual leaders to live in same-sex relationships openly. Over 63 million babies have been aborted in America since abortion became legal in 1973. Our nation – and, in fact, the world – can’t sink much lower in morality.

Even seemingly neutral subjects like sporting events have taken a decidedly deep dive over the past decade. In addition to the consistently outrageous mindset that transgender athletes – read that as men who identify as women – should be allowed to participate in and dominate women’s sports – we now have the organizers of this year’s Olympic games taking a pot-shot at Christianity in their opening event.

Gone is the parade of athletes formerly featured at the world’s Olympic games. Instead, this year’s Summer Olympics opening featured a disturbing recreation of Leonardo Da Vinci’s “The Last Supper.” In a live and profoundly irreverent interpretation of the same, the artistic director of the opening, Thomas Jolly, utilized Drag Queens in lingerie as the disciples, an obese woman in a low-cut, sequined garment sporting a halo, chains, and tattoos as Christ, and even more uncomfortably, a child seated at the table, surrounded by this debauchery. When I first read the headline announcing the same, I had to ask, “What on earth does poking fun at one of the most meaningful events in Christian history have to do with sports?” Seemingly nothing. But that didn’t matter to the event organizers.

Advocates of this blasphemous display worked hard to defend it for two days – insisting that the tableau was not “The Last Supper” but rather an artistic interpretation of a festival of Dionysus. After all, the production also featured a blue-painted actor sprawled astride a lavish serving dish on the same table where the Drag Queens posed – seemingly depicting the Greek God.

As the outcry continued, organizers of Paris 2024 later admitted, “For the ‘Festivities’ segment, Thomas Jolly took inspiration from Leonardo Da Vinci’s famous painting to create the setting.” Jolly ultimately referred to his presentation as a celebration of “tolerance” – despite its blatant intolerance and mockery of Christianity.

So, what caused organizers to bow and apologize to anyone who saw this display as it was intended – as a degradation of our faith in a completely inappropriate venue? They could have maintained their tight-lipped stance regarding what some have declared a simple “parody” of a sacred event. As Paris 2024 explained, “[Jolly] is not the first artist to make a reference to what is a world-famous work of art. From Andy Warhol to ‘The Simpsons,’ many have done it before him.”

Was it the profound condemnation of the event that filled social media accounts over the weekend that caused the tables to turn? After all, many noteworthy leaders spoke out against the performance.

Elon Musk, the founder of Tesla and owner of X, wrote on his platform, “This was extremely disrespectful to Christians.”

Harrison Butker, the Kansas City Chiefs kicker who recently made headlines by standing for his faith at a college commencement ceremony, responded to the controversy by quoting scripture. “Be not deceived, God is not mocked. For what things a man shall sow, those also shall he reap. For he that soweth in his flesh, of the flesh also shall reap corruption. But he that soweth in the spirit, of the spirit shall reap life everlasting.’ Galatians 6:7-8.”

Radio host Clint Russell observed, “There are 2.4 billion Christians on earth and apparently the Olympics wanted to declare loudly to all of them, right out of the gate NOT WELCOME.”

House Speaker Mike Johnson wrote on X, “The war on our faith and traditional values knows no bounds today. But we know that truth and virtue will always prevail.” Johnson, like many others, backed his statement by quoting scripture: “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” (John 1:5)

Italy’s Deputy Prime Minister Matteo Salvini also issued a statement that read, “Opening the Olympics by insulting billions of Christians around the world was a really bad start, dear French.”

Despite this outrage, it wasn’t until advertisers like TN-based tech company C Spire used their wallets to pull event advertisements that organizers suddenly seemed to care about the controversy. As C Spire posted on X, “We were shocked by the mockery of the Last Supper during the opening ceremonies of the Paris Olympics. C Spire will be pulling our advertising…”

Twenty-four hours later, Paris 24 organizers half-heartedly apologized by saying, “Clearly, there was never an intention to show disrespect towards any religious group or belief.” When money is involved, everyone listens.

Events such as this will hardly end after this controversy. The world will remain dark and continue to manipulate whatever it can to gain attention, satisfy powerful perversions, and mock the light of the world – Jesus Christ.

The question is, how publicly are we willing to stand up for our faith? Will we do so even when others stand against us? Will we speak the truth to a lost world, even when threatened with hate speech, fear-mongering, and public ridicule? How many of us are ready to take a stand when the prince of this world – the devil himself – wants us to fall?

I’m committed to staying plugged into the Word of Christ – one of the surest ways to remain strong in the faith. David and I are vigilant in reading scripture together every night. We know that things aren’t getting better for Christians in the world. In fact, the fires will assuredly become hotter and more hostile towards anyone who proclaims the name of Jesus in the future.

That’s why it’s more important than ever to put on the armor of the Lord. Without it, we, as Christians, can never “take up the shield of faith, with which [we] can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.” (Ephesians 6:16)

The battle is only beginning. Gird up your loins and prepare. If we intend to bring God’s light into a blindingly dark world, we must stay attached to its source – Jesus Christ.

If we do, no matter what happens, even after we’ve done everything, we will still stand. (Ephesians 6:13)

God will make a home with you

God will make a home with you

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Jesus replied, “All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and We will come and make Our home with each of them.” (John 14:23)

David and I recently celebrated our 5-month wedding/10-month meeting anniversary on August 12th. Although I realize we’re still considered newlyweds, our love and appreciation for each other are timeless.

How many people marry and tire of each other in just a few weeks or months? Far too many, I fear. And yet, David and I can barely stand to be apart. We’ve waited a lifetime to be together, so every moment is a gift.

That statement is far from hyperbole. With my full-time, remote employment and David’s general retirement status, we are blessed to spend nearly every hour of every day together. We couldn’t do that if our lives weren’t so harmonious. Time apart is as minimal as we can muster. Togetherness, in my estimation, is the truest test of enduring love. We could easily tire of one another if we weren’t well-suited.

David and I share a smile as we kayak together near Jekyll Island, GA.

As someone who was previously married for 14 and then 12 years, respectively, I’ve lived on the opposite side of the spectrum for far too long. As a Christian woman married to professed believers who turned out not to share my faith, I used to feel it was my duty to be the best spouse I could be – all the while praying for hearts to change that had no desire to do so. For 26 years of my life, I endured physical and psychological abuse believing God would convert souls that were both immovable and unrepentant. Pray as I might, our incompatibilities and unequal yokes made for decades of misery that I’ve worked hard to forget. I never had five days or five even hours of anything good in those relationships – let alone five months.

All of that changed when God brought David into my world. My life, my entire existence is different with him. David and I thrive when we’re together and never tire of each other. Before every meal, we consistently pray – thanking God for the miracle of our love. Every day, we laugh, affirm, hold, kiss, and cherish each other more profoundly than the day before.

Every day, we gaze into each other’s eyes and celebrate the incredulity of finding one another. “We met on a bus” or “We got married” are our frequent refrains as we revel in the joy of such blessings. Simple as they sound, these declarations never cease to astound either one of us. We know the Originator of our happiness, and we are so grateful for the same. Our meeting, our compatibility, and our love for one another are all based on our joint devotion to God. We met because we both surrendered to our Savior. Two strangers from different states met under seemingly random circumstances to serve God – never imagining that in doing so, we would find our long-sought soulmates.  

And yet, here we are.

Still, David and I didn’t just meet on a bus, nor did we just happen to get married. I told David we need to refine our simple declarations to better reflect the magnitude of God’s magnificence.

The day after David proposed to me in Fort Myers, FL, the two of us served again with Samaritan’s Purse.

David and I met on a Samaritan’s Purse bus after surrendering our lives to our Heavenly Father’s calling. In response to a natural disaster and in joint service to our Creator, it was there that we found the other piece of ourselves that we’d been searching for since birth. Had we not surrendered, we would never have received the blessing we hold in our hands and hearts today – true love and absolute compatibility. How else can we explain how we can love the same music (from contemporary Christian to classical), the same food (from spaghetti to seafood), and identical taste in movies and TV shows (from period dramas like “All Creatures Great and Small” to epic motion pictures like “Lord of the Rings”). Thankfully, there’s never any fighting over the remote control in our household.

A metal bird bath David and I acquired at an estate sale needed cleaning and sanding before it could be repainted.

David and I understand what it means to work hard – which is a good thing as we’re continually doing so. With the heavy responsibilities of maintaining our GA home as well as my mom’s when she is in CO, our yard work never ends. Two weeks out of every month, we travel back to VA Beach – where we are now – to work on David’s former house or renovation jobs that involve massive, manual labor. I often ask David if he could have ever imagined working with his wife in such a way. He always responds with a resounding, “Never!” Whether we’re digging ditches or re-shingling a roof, we still take the time to kiss, hug, and say “I love you” a thousand times a day.

Our freshly repainted bird bath.

Most importantly, throughout our hectic, helter-skelter existence, we cling to one another and God – celebrating the gift of true love presented to us by our Savior.

Although David and I didn’t do anything special on our anniversary, just being together was reason enough to celebrate. We both worked on renovation projects in our GA yard that day – me sanding a metal bird bath and David spreading epoxy on iron chairs – prepping both for repainting. As I began my project, I paused to turn on one of my favorite contemporary Christian music channels to praise God while I worked.

The first song played was one from our wedding – a favorite of ours by Jeremy Camp, entitled “Getting Started.” As the opening chords began, recognition dawned. David and I immediately gravitated to one another, as we always do, dancing and singing the lyrics to one another and God.

Formerly rusty iron table and chair set David restored and prepped for repainting.

Looking up at the sky while we danced, I was struck by a 2-year-old memory of crying out to my Creator in a rare moment of abject loneliness while formerly working alone in my yard. I still remember the emotions that flooded my spirit as I looked up and told God how much I loved Him – even as my heart despaired at the absence of earthly love. As the cleansing tears streamed down my face, I recall surrendering my despondency to my Heavenly Father. In complete submission to His will, my Creator filled my spirit with His love and faithfulness – as He always did – providing me with everything I needed to go on.

Flash forward to our anniversary. As David and I danced in my yard, singing to God and each other, the tears fell anew as I realized how God always knows what I need when I need it. Two years ago, God knew then – as He always has – what He had in store for my future. I could never have imagined my resounding joy in finding David. Never in my wildest dreams could I have foreseen the beauty that would fill my soul at the reality of being loved.

And yet, here we are.

The repainted table and chairs that David and I restored now graces our GA screen porch.

God’s promises are real. God has always made a home for me and David. Whether we have five years or five millennia together, David and I know how blessed we are. Every day is a gift from God. All we did was heed our Creator’s call. In doing so, our Heavenly Father fulfilled His promise to us. As Christ said, “All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and We will come and make Our home with each of them.” (John 14:23)

To that, I can only say, “Yay, God!”

Who the Son sets free

Who the Son sets free

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So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. (John 8:36) 

David and I celebrated our first Fourth of July together a few weeks ago while working on his VA Beach house renovations. His home is a long-postponed fixer-upper – built in the 1960s – that we’re enjoying renovating together. Well, David is renovating. I’m helping and encouraging him every step of the way.   

David’s original living room with concrete floors and taupe walls.

Watching the transformation is astounding. I’ve always enjoyed restoration jobs myself. I’ve stripped and restored furniture, planned and orchestrated vast landscaping projects, and removed a horrific chalk wall in my former kitchen. I used to think my undertakings were pretty good. They’re nothing like David’s. To see the concrete floors of David’s home be replaced with beautiful Pergo wood plank flooring is phenomenal. What a difference the flooring has made in his house! And the renovations are just beginning.   

A swath of lighter paint shows the future color of David’s walls above his original concrete flooring.

More than that, I remember the day David came to me in GA, jumping up and down in our garage like a little kid. He was so full of energy, joy, and excitement that his actions surprised me. We’d only been married for a few weeks when David decided to flush all his anti-depressants down the toilet. A counselor had prescribed them to him years ago, and he’d faithfully kept taking them, thinking there was no way he could stop doing so.   

“I feel so good! I feel so good! I feel so good!” David kept saying. I remember thinking, is this for real? Could this reaction last? All I knew at the time was that his transformation amazed me.  

I’m happy to report that the changes did last – and the results are beautiful.   

That got me thinking; how many people are walking around today with lives wholly controlled by medication, illegal drugs, or believing that some form of surgery will somehow “make them better”?   

While 2023 statistics are still being calculated, 2016 figures reported that one in six Americans were taking anti-depressants – not yet considering COVID isolation escalations. According to the UK-based Pharmaceutical Journal, in 2022, anti-depressant use escalated by 5.1%, with a whopping increase of 35% in new users over the past six years.   

David sits on the couch in his renovated living room.

The real question is, how many of those who now use anti-depressants genuinely need the medication? According to the Economist, independent studies have shown that only 15% of those taking anti-depressants showed improvement with the drugs versus those taking placebos.   

In 2021, I watched a dear friend plummet from happy to suicidal within months. Despite her previously diagnosed depression, I witnessed firsthand my loved one’s determination to thrive. In just a few short months, Patty had recently recovered from hip surgery, bought herself a new car, and consistently gave God praise and glory for her many blessings in life. After months of not seeing her long-term counselor during her post-surgical recovery, she visited him, prompting a medication modification.  

Freshly painted walls and new flooring completely changed the look of David’s living room.

 Unfortunately, this prescription alteration mutated Patty’s behavior from jubilant to joyless in just a few short weeks. I watched her lose her will to do anything – including cleaning her apartment, bathing, seeing me, or caring for her cat.   

After a month of decline, I called Patty’s doctor to inform him of her altered mood and my concern. He was reluctant to adjust his prescriptions, opting to give her more time to adjust to his prescription changes.   

A little over a month later, after not reaching Patty by phone, I requested a welfare check from her apartment’s management team. Mere words can hardly express the shock and horror I felt after learning that my friend had been found dead. To this day, I remain confident that Patty purposely took her own life via a drug overdose of prescription medication. I still miss her greatly.  

Similar to the societal desire to utilize mood-altering anti-depressants, illegal drug use is continually rising – with fentanyl becoming one of the deadliest offenders. Between 2016 and 2021, fentanyl-related overdose deaths increased by 279% in our nation. David and I recently passed a country home near Chesapeake, VA, with a banner strewn across their front fence featuring the face of a loved one whose life had been tragically ended by fentanyl at a young age. A few years ago, I listened to prosecutors detail the devastation this drug can inflict on a community as I sat on a federal jury seeking to convict a drug dealer on six counts of the distribution of fentanyl. We found him guilty on all counts.  

And what about the rise of life-altering surgeries being pushed on minors who’ve been convinced by the media, teachers, and the internet that they will not be happy until they fully embrace their “self-identified” gender? Apart from the loss of innocence of our youth, the confusion, madness, and chaos inflicted on families facing these challenges is unfathomable.   

Just ask Erin Friday, a California mom who battled the sinister propaganda machine that sought to steal her daughter from her for the gender cult. “This is a $11 billion industry,” Friday said. “It’s a multi-headed hydra. There are people who are pushing this for financial gain; the medical community and the Big Pharma are pushing this because each trans-identified child is worth a million to a million-and-a-half dollars. They are lifelong medical patients.”  

My friend Patty and I celebrated our last Easter together in 2021.

And so I ask again, how many people believe they need something that harms them – sometimes irreparably – because someone told them they needed it?   

How many people are like the woman that news reporter Laura Ingraham interviewed (1:51) on the streets of San Francisco, crying because she felt she had to have fentanyl to cope with life?   

How many doctors prescribe medications to “help” people who don’t need them?   

How many people think they need a drug, medication, or surgery to “fix” what only God and love can do?   

Such thoughts come from the devil. He’s manipulating countless people into seeking anything other than God.   

David and I in Savannah on Memorial Day.

But not David. Not any longer. David is free, thanks to his Savior. My husband is a wonderful, handsome, talented, intelligent, gifted, tender, kind, thoughtful, and uniquely magnificent man. I’m so grateful to God for giving David to me as my husband – and for giving David his freedom.   

While I’m continually amazed by David’s ability to transform projects into masterpieces, I’m more impressed by what our Heavenly Father has done to ultimately convert David’s body and spirit into a new creation. As 2 Corinthians 5:17 reminds us, “If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a] The old has gone, the new is here!”   

David’s and my lives are better for our Savior’s touch. We perpetually pray that all those seeking God will find liberty in His transforming power – just as we have. After all, as John 8:36 reminds us, “if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” 

How did we get here? – The David and Sara Saga, Part 2

How did we get here? – The David and Sara Saga, Part 2

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“I will exalt you, Lord, for you lifted me out of the depths and did not let my enemies gloat over me.” (Psalm 30: 1)

“How did we get here?” David’s brother, Jeffrey, asked at the start of his toast to his brother and me during our wedding reception. “How did we get to where they’re married?”

Unlike traditional toasts that provide anecdotes while congratulating the lucky couple, Jeffrey built his speech around whether God knows or cares about us when we’re hurting. His words struck a chord with not just David and me but everyone privileged to hear the “backstory,” as he called it. 

David and I stand in front of one of the shore-stranded and stacked shrimp boats in Ft. Myers, FL – post-Hurricane Ian in January, 2023.

If you read my blog, you already know how David and I met and how unexpectedly beautiful our God-given love story is. Neither of us was looking for love when we traveled to Florida to help Samaritan’s Purse with disaster relief in Ft. Myers, post-Hurricane Ian. Anyone attending our wedding knew the same. 

Instead, Jeffrey elaborated more on who God is and how much He used the love of our Creator to unite us. 

“Yeah, you might say that they met on a hurricane project – a clean-up project in Ft. Myers on October 12th,” Jeffrey continued. “But I want to know where they were before that. I can tell you, there was a lot of pain. There were hearts that were shattered – broken relationships, dreams obliterated, enduring years of disappointments, wondering where God was in the pain of it all. They were begging for help.”

“I wonder if God did know the agony of their souls,” Jeffrey questioned. “Does God really get us? Does God really know what’s going on in those times?”

For the next five minutes, Jeffrey shared scripture with the spellbound room as he turned to passage after passage of reminders that God understands our heartaches. 

  • My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? O, my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer, and by night, but I find no rest. (Psalm 22: 1-2)
  • Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck. I sink in the miry depths, where there is no foothold. I have come into the deep waters; the floods engulf me. I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail, looking for my God. (Psalm 69:1-3)
  • Lord, you are the God who saves me; day and night, I cry out to you. May my prayer come before you; turn your ear to my cry. I am overwhelmed with troubles, and my life draws near to death. I am counted among those who go down to the pit; I am like one without strength. I am set apart with the dead, like the slain who lie in the grave, whom you remember no more, who are cut off from your care. (Psalm 88: 1-5)

“I think God does get it,” Jeffrey affirmed. “At least two thousand years ago…people were hurting but hanging on. God does know that we suffer. He [gives] us these words to give us comfort, to know we are not alone.”

I couldn’t agree more. Despite everything I’ve been through, my love for God never changed. His Holy Word kept me focused on my Savior and less on myself. In fact, my eternal love for my Heavenly Father sustained me during moments that could have broken me otherwise. The times when I felt utterly rejected by the world, I always knew that God was with me and loved me. That thought continually gave me hope. 

By worldly standards, I was the perpetual outcast – shunned, spurned, and shamed in past relationships. 

And yet, I never lost sight of my Father’s love. God’s grace pulled me up from the depths of despair more times than I could ever mention. I was committed to loving and serving my Savior – no matter the cost. 

“What got them to this place right there?” Jeffrey continued. “Their love of God. They didn’t know each other, but they loved God. And that was the key component that they required in anyone else.”

David and I were privileged to serve with Samaritan’s Purse in Ft. Myers on Monday, December 12, 2022 – the day after he proposed to me.

Jeffrey went on to explain David’s ultimate decision around a year ago not to date anyone unless they loved God. That decision only came after another broken, worldly relationship pulverized his heart. Despite his best intentions in helping others, David learned the hard way that his pursuit of love with anyone who didn’t understand Christ would inevitably end in heartache. 

“When he first told me about Sara, I knew she had passed the test,” Jeffrey explained to the sound of chuckles. “It was their love of God that got them there, despite all the lonely trials…Despite the effects of loneliness, they still heard God cry out that He needed people. God said, ‘Hmm. Tragedy in Florida. Whom shall I send?’ And David in Virginia Beach and Sara in Georgia, like Isaiah, said ‘Here am I, Lord. Send me.’ That’s how we got here. Their love of God became their love for each other.”

As David and I ponder the amazing grace that brought us together, we are continually in awe of the love we share and our God-aligned, astounding compatibilities. How many people in the world fully understand God’s love? And how many of us have surrendered our plans to our Heavenly Father’s? Of all the relationships currently standing, how many are built on God’s love, first and foremost? 

As Jeffrey said, David and I loved God and placed Him first in our lives. Despite my fears and David’s missteps, we knew we were called to serve our Savior. We would never have met if we hadn’t entirely surrendered to God’s will over our own. If either David or I had once said, “I can’t do it. It’s too hard. It’s too much. I’m too busy,” or even “Maybe next time,” our paths would never have crossed. 

How often, I wonder, do we miss the blessings that God has in store for us because we aren’t willing to relinquish our will to God’s? There may come a day when we all stand before our Heavenly Father in heaven and learn what our lives could have been if we’d only listened to God and done what He asked us to do instead of following our own plans for our lives. 

I hope and pray that I will always obey my Savior’s calling. I want to hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” (Matthew 25:23). I’ve made many mistakes in my life that I’ve had to live with. I don’t want to regret another moment when I could have done more for God but chose not to.

After all, it’s only when I fully surrendered to my Heavenly Father’s sustaining grace that I received the biggest blessing of my life – finding my soulmate in David. 

Whatever my Heavenly Father has yet to ask of me, whatever else He needs me to do, may I always be ready and eager to do so. After all, I’m a living testament to God’s outstanding provision. My life with David – finding true love with him is so much more than I ever could have asked for or imagined. 

And I wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t yielded to my Savior. I have true joy beyond imagination because I said the simple but meaningful words: My life is yours, God. Guide me. Use me. Send me.

May those words always be on my lips and yours, beloved. 

God is in this story – Part 2, The dress

God is in this story – Part 2, The dress

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I will thank You, LORD, among all the people. I will sing Your praises among the nations. (Psalm 108:3)

In my last blog – God is in this story – Part 1, The Ring – I talked about how my Heavenly Father preserved my sister’s diamond for decades until I met my soulmate and needed an engagement ring. 

A few weeks before David and I even considered rings, I met with my best friend, Didi, to share the good news of my engagement. I knew I had to tell Didi my story in person, so we arranged to meet at her house at the first opportunity.

My best friend, Didi, and me outside her home.

After detailing my story, I intended to ask Didi to be my Maid-of-Honor at the wedding. Before I could do so, she jumped up from her stool and exclaimed, “I have a dress! I have a dress!” 

As surprised as I was at her announcement, I wanted Didi to hear my request. “I’m not done with the story yet!” I laughed. “Sit back down and hear the rest of it!” 

After hugging and confirming her consent to join my wedding party, Didi jumped up in excitement again. “I have a dress! I have a dress!” 

Before I could stop her, my friend ran to her garage and returned with a zipped garment bag with the most beautiful dress I’d ever seen. 

“It’s from Bulgaria,” Didi explained. “My father brought it to me. I didn’t know what I’d do with it but thought maybe Sasha (Didi’s daughter) might wear it someday.” 

As Didi explained, her father still lives in Bulgaria. He surprised her with the dress years ago. His unexpected transportation of Didi’s former gown may have surprised her when he first presented it, but that could hardly match my shock of seeing a wedding dress come out of my friend’s garage. It even boasted a veil and crinoline.  

“It’s gorgeous,” I exclaimed. “I don’t know if it will fit – but it’s amazing! I can’t believe you had this in your garage.” 

Didi’s table setting for our visit included her mother’s Bulgarian plates and tea service.

“You don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to,” Didi demurred. “But you can’t even find a dress like this here. It was handmade and hand beaded. If you like it, you can wear it in your wedding!”

“I love it,” I affirmed. “It’s absolutely stunning!” 

“Try it on,” Didi pressed. “I think it will fit you.” 

Without hesitation, I tried on the perfect offering in shock and amazement at my heavenly Father’s provision. 

Miraculously, it fit!

“I can’t believe it!” I kept saying as Didi took pictures of me smiling in the dress – my face filled with joy at the incredulity of it all. 

“This is incredible,” I said. “God is so good! I can’t believe you had a wedding dress in your garage – and that it fits!” 

“You look beautiful in it,” Didi gushed. “It was meant to be.”

And so, I now have one more God-ordained component to add to my story. My Creator brought two strangers together in hurricane relief work and prompted my soon-to-be spouse to forget his lunch on the very day I had extra food to share. 

Two days later, God placed the notion in my head to ask needy homeowners to tear down their kitchen wall – leading me to David, the wall-breaker. Little did I know then that David would eventually tear down my psychological barriers, as well.  

That milestone achieved, my Creator brought me back to FL to help in the home where David would ultimately propose. 

The next morning, we returned to serve with Samaritan’s Purse, precisely two months to the day when we first met. I had planned our service day together long before David’s proposal was even a thought.  

And yet God knew how significant that day would be. 

The following week, I remembered my gifted diamond that would inevitably become the symbolic stone of my engagement. My sister had given it to me while she still lived in Fort Myers – the city where David and I were to meet by divine providence decades later. 

And then came my dress gift from God – perfectly preserved in my friend Didi’s garage. My Heavenly Father knew I would require it someday, so He compelled an earthy father to bring it from Europe for me. Although no one understood until now why the wedding dress was here, God knew I’d need it. In His omniscience, He provided a gown for me years before Hurricane Ian hit Florida and led me to serve with Samaritan’s Purse, let alone meet David.

And as unlikely as it seems, despite our size differences, Didi’s handmade dress fits me perfectly.

Step by step, God has demonstrated that He is not just in our story. His fingerprints are all over my life. No one could ever convince me otherwise. 

And so, I will continue to recount my miracles to anyone I can – the jewelers, my friends, everyone coming to our wedding, the clerk in the county marriage office we met on Valentine’s Day (another story entirely), the pilot that brought David and I back together again on the holiday, my new doctor, all the clerks at Hobby Lobby who helped us find church decorations, my bosses and co-workers – and now all of you. I can’t stop talking about my miracles!

So, you see, God is in this story. 

Even more, our Heavenly Father oversees all our stories – even when we don’t see or feel Him. There’s no moment He hasn’t already foreseen. He is right there with us through our trials and triumphs, our challenges and victories.

I feel God’s power over my life in a whole new way. I know that God loves me and has given me my heart’s greatest longing – His unconditional, unwavering, unearthly love, all wrapped up in the earthly body of a man named David. 

Let my story strengthen your faith, beloved. Let it remind you that God knows what will happen in our lives, even before birth. If I can find my soulmate in the aftermath of a hurricane, a handmade European wedding dress in a friend’s garage, and a diamond in a long-forgotten box sent by my deceased sister decades earlier – there is nothing our Creator can’t do.

God knows you, beloved. He longs to bless you, give you hope, and a future (Jer. 29:11). Surrender to Him and let Him shower you with blessings as He has me. Our God can do anything. Let my story show you how very true that is. His fingerprints are all over your life – just as they are mine. 

[Note: I will post a picture of my beautiful wedding dress here after my wedding on March 12th. Stay tuned!]

God is in this story – Part 1, The Ring

God is in this story – Part 1, The Ring

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Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and He will establish your plans. (Proverbs 16:3) 

In just three short weeks from today, I will walk down the aisle to pledge the rest of my life to the man God sent me while serving Him. I have no doubt about making that claim. God’s fingerprints are all over every aspect of our story.   

When David and I began looking at rings, I was shocked at the price tags, which exceeded my expectations. We checked a pawn shop first but quickly learned that wedding sets might be hard to find.  

“I don’t need a ring,” I told David as we left the store.   

“Yes, you do,” David confirmed. “We both do.”  

We went to Sam’s Club next and found a beautiful set, only to learn that what you see is what you get in a big box store. If the men’s and women’s rings fit, you can buy them. If they don’t, you’re out of luck. These rings are one-size-fits-all – even though they don’t.   

As David and I considered trying the jeweler at our local mall, I realized I had another option.  

“I have a diamond,” I told David. “Years ago – maybe decades – my sister sent me a diamond, still in the necklace setting but without the chain. I asked her what I should do with it. She told me to keep it and that I should just save it.”   

There’s so much more to this story that needs to be shared. My sister, Jackie, was living in Fort Myers, FL, when she sent me the precious stone. The fact that she lived there is one of the reasons I chose to help Samaritan’s Purse in that location. I could have served in Punta Gorda or Englewood – also affected by the hurricane – but I went to Fort Myers for two reasons. First and foremost, Fort Myers was the hardest hit city in the storm. I wanted to serve where I could do the most good.   

I also wanted to go there because that’s where Jackie had previously lived. Married three times, she resided in Fort Myers during her second troubled marriage as she fought for custody of her daughter and the ability to leave the state.   

Eventually winning that privilege, Jackie moved to Colorado and married again. A few short years later, Jackie and her daughter were killed by her third husband, who later took his own life.   

I hadn’t thought about the diamond Jackie gave me in years. Only at that moment did God choose to remind me that I already had a precious jewel in my possession.   

“I’m not sure I can find it,” I told David, “but if I can, maybe we could put it into a ring. It would be incredibly symbolic, since Jackie lived in Fort Myers, and that’s where you and I met.”  

“You should look for it,” David agreed. “We should definitely do that.”  

Amazingly, despite not thinking about it for years, I found the diamond the first place I looked.   

The next day, David and I took the jewel – in its long-forgotten orange velvet box – to the mall. The first store we visited was not for us – but we met Jimmy at the second.   Jimmy McSpadden is the assistant manager at Reeds Jewelers. After offering to help us look at rings, I told Jimmy about my diamond. He asked to look at it. When I showed it to him, he told me he’d get someone to check it. A few minutes later, Jimmy confirmed that I had a half-carat diamond that would have cost us $2,500 if we’d bought a similar ring straight out of the case.   

“You should put this on a band,” confirmed Jimmy. “It holds great significance to you.”  

After explaining how David and I had met while performing disaster relief work in FL for Samaritan’s Purse, I detailed my sister’s story and how she’d gifted the diamond to me.   

“She lived in Fort Myers,” I detailed. “It’s partly why I chose to go there. Decades before my sister’s death, she sent me this diamond, although I never knew why. I’ve barely thought about it for years.”   

“Let’s find you a band to put it on,” Jimmy said. “That’s quite a story.”   

After choosing a band and sizing my finger, we chose a ring for David and requested that it be sized, too. We promised to return for our rings after Christmas – long before David suggested I fly back to FL rather than GA after visiting my family over the holidays. I agreed with David and knew our rings would have to wait.   

As noted in my last blog post – Building an ark is never easy but always worth it – it’s safe to say that David and I lived through the fire in January. Our initial plan was for me to help with the rebuild over the long New Year’s Eve weekend. After seeing how much work was left to complete, New Year’s weekend soon turned into a week and, ultimately, a month. There was too much to do, and I was more than happy to help.   

And yet, doing so quickly escalated into a more significant challenge than either of us expected.   

While other couples may live with their respective families early in their marriages, David and I lived with strangers, working twelve-to-fifteen-hour days while rebuilding a home from the inside out. The only breaks we took were to eat and sleep – continuing our work through the weekends. Nightly supply runs were the only time we stepped away from the house we lived and worked in.   

With a shared bathroom, kitchen, and communal space, we encountered daily opportunities to demonstrate patience, kindness, and service not just to each other but also to the homeowners whose house we shared.  

Still, as David likes to say, “There was never a cross word between us.”   

During that interval, we learned to assist, encourage, pray for, and support one another to the degree that few other couples ever experience. God was with us in that place, and I am so grateful for our time together there. It significantly strengthened our relationship. 

David and I share a joyous moment with our new rings.

David and I couldn’t pick up our rings until late January, as a result. When we finally returned to GA, it was our priority to retrieve them – but only if Jimmy was there. “He’s a part of our story, too,” we both agreed. “We can only get the rings from Jimmy.”   

David called the jewelry store twice to confirm that Jimmy would be there. When we arrived, Jimmy stepped into the back to retrieve our rings and returned with the jeweler who had sized them both and mounted my diamond.   

“This is the couple I told you about,” Jimmy told his teammate. “The ones with the special diamond.”   

My special diamond, provided by God, decades ago.

“God brought us together while serving Him,” I explained. “Thank you so much for your help!”   

After reiterating our story and sharing photos of the FL rebuild, we reminded everyone of our testimony. “When you surrender to God, He will give you the desires of your heart.”   

As we walked away from this momentous occasion, I was reminded how great our God is. Long before David and I met, my heavenly Father gave a diamond to my sister, who then sent it to me. Our Creator knew then that I would meet David – decades later – unexpectedly fall in love and need a unique jewel for my ring. I’m continually amazed at my Father’s provision, orchestrated long before finding my soulmate. David and I would never have met if I hadn’t followed God’s calling.   

David and I celebrate our God-given engagement with unique rings.

Instead, we share a love story that grows more profound daily. To think that my Father orchestrated everything years ago still astounds me.   

But that’s the God we serve. He knows everything and longs to bless us. If we only surrender to Him, our Creator can and will give us the desires of our hearts. It all begins with a simple act of obedience – and total surrender. I thank God daily for the blessings He’s bestowed upon me.   

This story is far from over. Be sure to read part two to see what God provided next!   

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