A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. (John 13:34)

A few days before Valentine’s Day, I awoke inspired to shower my visiting 88-years-young mother with love and attention on this memorable holiday. I rarely get to share this celebrated occasion with my mom as she and my brother, Joe, primarily live in Colorado. While they’re visiting Georgia this month, I was excited to make this day something uniquely memorable.

“I want mom to feel really special,” I explained to my husband, David. “I’m going to fix her hair and makeup, help her get dressed up, and then cook a fancy meal for her. I want to set everything up as if she’s in a restaurant, but I’ll need your help.”

As a young adult, David spent a few years as a waiter in the now-defunct restaurant Bennigans and a few other VA Beach hot spots. He’d told me stories of his experiences, so I knew I needed his assistance to bring my vision to life.

“I want you to dress up like a waiter,” I told him. “I’ll have music playing in the background when Mom and Joe come over. You can seat them at the table, and we’ll serve the food, one course at a time. It’ll be great!”

David eagerly agreed.

Over the next few days, I planned the menu, crafted the dinner invitation, and carefully considered the prep work required to orchestrate my plans. Everything was in place to make this a night to remember – until it wasn’t.

Hours before the evening preparations began, my plans slowly crumbled around me. Try as I might, I had never made it out to shop for the makeup I wanted for my mom’s makeover. I average 10-hour work days, which doesn’t allow much time to go shopping – and I wouldn’t dream of asking David to pick out and purchase makeup for my mom.

That’s okay, I thought. She can use mine.

Then, there was the lack of preparation time on Valentine’s Day. Rather than easing into my orchestrations with an abridged workday, one thing after an other kept me working longer than expected. When I finally shut down my computer, I had only an hour and a half to facilitate everything.  

At 5:00 pm, I began rushing around, grabbing my makeup and fingernail polish – another add-on I thought would be fun for Mom – and then ran next door to my mom’s house. What I had hoped would be fun became stressful at that point.

Upon entering, I found her lying half asleep on her bed. “She didn’t sleep well last night,” my brother explained. “She’s resting now.”

To assist my mom with her night out, I hoped to surprise her by acting out the part of “Shelly, the stylist.” It would be Shelly who would help Mom prepare for her big night out. After finding my mom in her current state, I seriously questioned my judgment in thinking I could do anything like this without informing her in advance of the same.

When Mom called me back to her bedroom to ask what I had in my hands, I explained to her that the curling iron and clothes were for me to assist her in preparing for dinner. “Oh, no,” my mom said, looking shocked and bewildered. “I can’t handle that.”

“That’s okay,” I said, quickly losing the Southern drawl I had planned to utilize in her makeover session. “You just rest. We can do this tomorrow.”

After returning home, David asked me what brought me back so quickly.

“Well,” I began. “Mom is exhausted after not getting enough sleep last night. I told her we’ll try again tomorrow. We’ll see. I hope all of this works out.” I spent the rest of the evening preparing food for the next day so I wouldn’t be caught rushing again.

When the following evening came around, I changed my clothes, adopted my Southern drawl, and moved next door – hoping Take Two of the script would work better than the first round did the day before.

As I approached Mom’s house, I found her slowly walking around the yard. When she saw me, I immediately adopted my drawl, extended my arm, and escorted her back into the house. Much to my delight, my mom laughed and went along with every silly thing I did for her.

As I moved her to her back porch, I asked her which color she wanted for her nails – “Pale pink or hot pink,” I drawled. “In the south, it’s gotta be pink.”

Choosing hot pink, I began painting my mom’s fingernails, something I’d never done before. Seeing how much she loved the experience made me vow to repeat the activity more regularly.

After gushing my way through how “be-a-you-ti-ful” her fingernails looked, I advised her that she would be “beating them off with a stick” over dinner. Thankfully, my mom kept laughing at my silly antics and fake Southern drawl.

After applying lotion to her face, I regretfully explained that I only had a “lighter than suntan” foundation for her skin since my skin tone is much paler than my mother’s.

Much to my surprise, my mom announced that she had purchased some makeup for herself from the “Here and There” store, which I took to be her remembered name of her favorite thrift shop: “Hello Good-buy.” Rushing into her “twa-let” to retrieve the cosmetic, I found the same expensive foundation I had planned to buy her but never had the time to do so. She had purchased it for the special price of one whole dollar, as evidenced by the bright orange sticker on the side.

“What a shopper you are!” I gushed as I smoothed the foundation over her skin. “A good Southerner knows how to bargain shop, and you are indeed the queen of thrifting!”

Her choice of lipstick also delighted me as she chose my own signature red over maroon to tint her lips. As my brother looked on, trying not to laugh, I asked my mom to purse her lips, to which she closed her lips entirely. “Unless you want to look like Tammy Faye Baker, you’d best show me a pouty face so I can see your purty lips and apply this here lipstick.”  

A few minutes later, I outlined my mom’s lips and gently applied the bright color, asking her to go, “Mwah mwah to spread the color around.” She did so, nearly causing me to laugh aloud at her complete cooperation and our absolute fun in the preparation.

After giving Mom a new “bedazzled sweater” to wear to dinner, I returned home to change into my dinner ensemble and begin finalizing the meal. David, too, switched into his white-shirted waiter gear with a kitchen towel over his arm to complete the preparations.

When the appetizers – homemade cheese and bacon potato skins – were ready, I called my brother and made buzzing sounds, advising him that his “table was up” so he could “proceed to the restaurant.”

David greeted them at the door, inviting Mom and Joe into the Casa dell Amore – the name I gave our restaurant. I videotaped their entrance and was delighted as my mom said, “Muchas gracias,” – playing along with our created scenario. In response, I donned a new fake Italian accent, telling them, “Welcome! Welcome!” as they sat down at the table for dinner being held in Mom’s honor.

The rest of the evening went off without a hitch as we all savored the stuffed salmon, asparagus, and sweet potato main course – followed by a strawberries and whipped cream parfait for mom and cherry cheesecake for the rest of us. While Andrea Bocelli serenaded our meal, David played the piano between courses, and we all laughed, relishing our time together.

Amid the “to go” boxes I gave my mom and Joe for their leftovers, they told me what a great evening they had. David and I confirmed the same, saying we enjoyed it as much as they did.

On the way to church together the next day, Mom said the night was “the most fun she’d had in a long time,” which made my heart sing.

Looking back, I know I could have called the whole thing off when my original plans failed – but that thought never entered my mind. I know how important it is to show love. Rather than give up, I took it all in stride and tried again the next day. And look at the memories we made as a result!

The entire event reminds me of how easy it is to let simple opportunities to show love disappear. We’re too busy. We might be rejected. It’s too much effort or risk. Yes, things don’t always work out, and there is always the prospect of failure, frustration, and disappointment.

But what potential joy do we relinquish by failing to extend love at every opportunity? Even if we are turned down, stepped on, and pushed away nine times out of ten, isn’t the tenth worth it? Didn’t Jesus Himself feel disappointment and rejection? Didn’t he suffer and die on the cross, bleeding to save our undeserving, unrepentant souls to show us what love is all about?

John 3:16 embodies the gospel message of God’s all-encompassing love by reminding us that our Creator sacrificed His Son so we can live forever by simply believing in Christ.

In a similar way, 1 John 3:16 reminds us to live out this theology by loving others just as He demonstrated to us: “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”

Take a chance, beloved. Let love fill your house. Let it overflow into your life and onto others at every opportunity. Love is a place where we all should live – long beyond Valentine’s Day. It should be celebrated, practiced, and lived in – every day of the year.