Relinquishing control

The bolts of your gates will be iron and bronze, and your strength will equal your days. – Deuteronomy 33:25

“I don’t know what I was thinking in starting a new job,” I lamented to my brother. “I’m not good with change. I like order and consistency.” 

I was in my third week at my new workplace, and things were not going well. From the first day in the office, I struggled to connect to intranet sites that I needed to perform my duties. My computer issues were getting worse instead of better. Programs weren’t working, and my inbox had to be rebuilt three times. 

It’s hard enough to learn a new position, but having to do so without help while experiencing technical difficulties was too much. After spending nearly four and a half hours on the phone with the Help Desk one day, I was nowhere near a resolution. “We’ve never seen anything like this before,” the technicians told me – a statement that provided anything but comfort. 

Adding insult to injury, my thirty-five-minute commute took an hour and a half that day. I arrived home feeling exhausted and broken. I need your help, Lord, I prayed. I can’t do this on my own. 

Perhaps I’d made a mistake in starting this new job. It had seemed like such an answer to prayer when I first accepted the position. The interviews had flowed smoothly, with God giving me the answers I needed to make a good impression. My new employer and co-workers were genuinely grateful for my arrival. And despite the new obstacles, I felt confident that I could demonstrate God’s light in this new environment. 

All that went out the window after four consistent days of problems evidencing themselves in my job performance. As much as I wanted to lay my head on my desk and cry, I kept a smile on my face and remained upbeat. 

I can’t let this defeat me, I thought. I described myself in my interview as positive, persistent, and patient. The very last thing I can do is demonstrate the opposite when faced with these difficulties. Lord Jesus, I prayed, please help me.

With those reflections in my mind, I called on my prayer warrior friends for reinforcement. “I need prayer,” I stated. “I’m wondering if I made a mistake in leaving my old job.”

One of my friends immediately challenged me in her response. “You know as well as I do that Satan will do anything in his power to make us feel we made the wrong choice,” she stated. “God opened this door and made easy and successful your way. Don’t let Satan steal your joy. Start covering yourself with the Armor of God and ask Him to go before you.” 

That response stopped me in my tracks. I had been praying for divine intervention. Maybe what I needed instead was to stand and do battle. Even more so, perhaps I needed to relinquish governance to God. My familiar way of finding resolution in order and consistency wasn’t working. Clearly, I was out of my element, and only God could provide the strength to overcome. 

After surrendering everything that was plaguing me, I felt the pressure slip away. One of my favorite verses came to mind as I yielded my situation to my Creator. “Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)

God had brought me to this role. He would give me the strength to conquer the problems that came with it. 

The following day, I came to work with a new resolve. I would overcome with God’s help. 

During our morning leadership team meeting, my new boss surprised everyone by using me as his weekly example of one who lived up to the company’s purpose: “To inspire and build better lives and communities.”

“Despite all the computer problems that have caused difficulties for Sara over the past few weeks,” my executive began, “she’s remained positive throughout. Even though I told her she had my permission to order a new computer, she’s determined to see this through. She’s my purpose story for the week – for her attitude and dedication.” 

I couldn’t help but smile when I heard these kind words. I knew these obstacles were nothing for God, and I accepted, anew, His dominion over my life.

After the meeting concluded, I tried something God had put on my mind to resolve my computer issues. While my workaround is not a long-term solution, everything that had plagued me all week was resolved, and I was able to get back to the work I needed to complete. With God’s help, I prevailed – with a genuine smile on my face. 

Without God’s strength, I couldn’t have made it through these past few weeks. Instead, He manifested His power, yet again, at precisely the moment when I needed it. I know things won’t always be easy and ordered, but with God’s help, I will overcome.

This week, and every week, I resolve to relinquish authority to the only one who controls my life in the first place.